Cess Richards

Cess Richards (2006; 2007)
Lester Morris
Episodes: 4326; 4395


After Kim’s car had broken down on the morning of his wedding and he had hitched a lift half the way there with a bikie, Kim was again left stranded until the bowling ladies minibus, driven by Cess passed by. Indeed, it did pass by, Cess stopping the bus 100 metres down the road from where Kim was standing as if the brake pedal was an eggshell.

After picking Kim up, Cess after making sure there wasn’t anyone within 2 miles of him started driving down the road. Betty Alsopp complained at the speed that Cess was driving at until they suffered a puncture. After Kim had managed to take off the flat tyre it was discovered that the spare was also flat, something that he was supposed to have fixed.

He replied that he had been too busy, to which Betty replied “Yes, with Madge Wilkins”.

Cess later acted as umpire when Colleen challenged Betty to a bowls match with a team comprising Alf, Irene and Leah. He organised the toss at the start of the match, which Colleen won by calling heads, and listened to Colleen’s claims that Betty’s bowling meant they would need to replay a game. Unknown to anyone but Belle, Drew, who had been appointed ball polisher, tampered with one of Betty’s balls, moving the stickers so they indicated the weight was on the wrong side. When Betty’s last ball went well wide of the jack, Colleen celebrated until Betty revealed the foul. Cess not only gave the game to Betty but told Colleen that she was disqualified and banned from the club for life, prompting her to faint.

In the closing credits, Cess was credited as Cess Green. However Betty had called him Cess Richards during his first episode