Support Group

[Sam =)]

Kat I can understand where you are coming from.

My parents seperated last yr and it was then that I realised how much I needed him. My mum tends to get jellous when I spemd time with him too and takes it out on me, but I just miss him I spande every day with my mum, brother and sister growing up I was always daddy's gorl and I find it hard with out him.

[Cerise]

Yeah, I generally prefered my dad to my mum. But i still wanted to be alone all the time but now...

But my Parents havnt seperated or anything (they arnt even married ) he just moved there for a job...

[Pierced Musie]

For the last few weeks I have been absent. Though my laptop was broke, I could have used my sisters at anytime but I couldn't. The past week I have mostly been crying and feeling angry, alone and unwanted.

I am getting a lot of pressure at Connexions and my new PA has basically ignored everything I have said (phobia of using a phone, communication with people is hard etc...) but I am too nice to say anything. A loud mouth from Connexions has been staying next door and it puts me on edge because this is my comfort zone. My parents make me feel unwanted and I guess this week I have really realized that I am not needed. They seem to only jump when my other sisters need something.

The more pressure I am getting, the more I have been getting suicidal thoughts and thoughts of just leaving in the early morning. I've also been scratching my wrists and hands a lot, along with cleaning them. I just feel so scruffy and dirty all the time.

I don't want to see another therapist.

I just feel I am not right for this world.

< /Seriousness >

[Cerise]

It sucks that you feel like that. But its not true that your not right, its just a feeling that people get when they're sad, angry or under pressure. I cant really give any advice, but y'know you have support from everyone here.

[Ashirr-Leigh]

Jess, if you're not right for this world then none of us are. Who's to say what like you have to be to fit in? I know it sounds like a terrible cliche but everyone really is different. Even the people that act the same are different, they just don't have the courage to be themselves.

Maybe you can try talk to the new PA? I know you're saying that's what's hard but yeah.. sucky advice, sorry. Just, I can't explain myself properly! I'll try rephrase if it comes to my head later.

As for the missing a parent thing, I get that. My mum died about a year and a half ago and I miss her. I wasn't close to her, at all, hadn't lived with her since I was five but still.. she was my mum. She had various mental health problems and just really, yeah.. I didn't really much see her or anything but it's just the way that everyone has a mum, you know? And I well.. I don't anymore. Don't get me wrong, I have a wonderful family, a great stepmum involved in that and it's amazing but yeah, I miss her.

Rosey! Totally, totally normal how you're feeling about this boy. It sucks but it'll probably happen more than once in your life. Growing up is hard! But please, if there are girls picking on you or whatever, you should tell someone and get something done about it because if it's so bad that it's making you not want to go on school trips and things then yeah.. it's not good.

Ah ok! So I feel like immense guilt.. and I don't know how to get rid of it. I've learned that if I had done something a long time ago, it would have stopped two other people from suffering. There's literally nothing I can do.. can't go back and change what I did, or more to the point, didn't do. But yeah, it's a horrible, awful, awful feeling.

[emmasi]

I just feel I am not right for this world.

I've almost convinced myself that I'm a goddess that's been trapped in a mortal body for some kind of punishment, but I don't remember what it is I've done wrong... This comes after years of thinking that I'm actually a gay man trapped in a woman's body as punishment for some... things... that I feel I might have done in my past life... Or, failing that, I'm simply an animal - possibly a wolf or a cat - that's been trapped in human form, again, as punishment.

Basically, I feel like I'm not meant to be in this body, and the reason I am is because I've done something wrong and deserve to suffer. Which is ridiculous, really, seeing that my body could be quite nice if I bothered to look after it - there's nothing irriversably wrong with me, physically... mentally however... yeah, I have issues.

I believe in God, which doesn't help. Because God has a plan, and if you reject his plan for you then you reject him and he'll be pissed. I'm not sure if I actually believe that, but I feel like I SHOULD believe it, and even questioning it is enough to warrent more punishment!!

I'm screwed.

But everytime I feel like an affront to God for wishing that I was someone I'm not, I liken it to someone giving you a dress that doesn't fit. You really appreciate the thought behind it, and it is a really nice dress, but you just don't feel comfortable in it - it's not the right dress for you. That's how I feel about my life sometimes... like God has given it to me with the best intentions, and I am grateful for the thought, but it's just not fitting right, and I'm not comfortable here...

But then I remember, God has a plan, and if his plan is for me to be screwed up, then I guess I just have to deal with it

Yep, religion screws you up royally.

[Sam =)]

I'm really having a run of bad luck at the moment and it's starting to take a toll on me

At school I have become really left out of my group because I live so far away from everyone I don't get to spend every afternoon with my friends like they all do and I justfell like I do't really have any good friends at school anymor.

My parents are on the verge of getting a divorce and I fould out since they seperated my dad has been with someone just never told us.

And today I was at Miranda just shopping and I got abused by this lady and I can't even say what she called me on here but it was terrible in the end I just moved away and ingnored it. Later on these two girls started following me around and I had enough so I hoped on the train to come home and they followed me there too so I sat down and just tried to ignore them but once I got on the train they chucked food at me and stole my bag then one of them punched me.

As it was I was already having trouble keeping my food down with everything else that is going on and now I have an assignment due tonight which I already had an extention for and the teacher will take no excuses even after I got my uncle who is in the police to call him and explain it all I still have to get it done by the end of the night but I cant do it I keep throwing up just thinking of it and crying. How the heck and I supposed to get an assignment done?

[emmasi]

Screw the teacher, he's a bastard. Go over his head and get your uncle to call the pricipal. You sound like you're fairly traumatized right now, which is completely understandable. What happened to you is awful. If that happened to me, I wouldn't even be going to school the next day - forget about doing assignments! If you hand in your assignment a day late, you shouldn't lose too many marks... just don't let that teacher push you around. Most of them are jerks and bullies and like to think they're better than you, but they're not. The majority are just losers who were too lazy or talentless to do what they really wanted to do, and too insecure to move on from highschool... There are the special few that actually care about their students and want to educate them for a better future, but this guy doesn't sound like one of them. Don't take any crap from him. If he thinks some random assignment is more important than your mental health, than he's a small, petty man, and don't be afraid to show him just how weak he really is.

[ilovekateritchie]

No one proberly wants to readthis, but my eating pattern goes liek this somtimes

Monday [or random day of week]

No breafast, No lunch, Forced dinner by parents and at night sometimes alcohol [shush!] or redbull on the odd occasion

Tuesday [or random day of week]

Maybe muffin for breakfast, no lunch, no dinner, more alcohol.

I did a BMI in the middle of the week, and it told me I was obese, bit ironic really. I neevr thought of myself like that. I though I was just a little bit overweight, but oviously not.

You can try it for your self if you think I'm lying, i'll PM you my details

Meanwhile, if you must spend time in the library, check out he dictionary.

Read a dictonary? Crazy..but I could try it.

but you see in my school, everyones labbelled. Theres the emos, the punks, the losers, the nerds, and what not.

i'm starting to think I classify under all of those. I dunno. I'm sorry for moainig somuch. Its 1 am and I just cant stop thinknig about it.

Oh sweetheart... I don't know what to say. I've had some friends with issues like these and dealing with it is hard... First of all - NEVER skip a meal. Especially not breakfast. Second of all - Alcohol will NEVER make things better, it just RUINS everything. (And it has a lot of sugar in, all in all, it's bad for you.) You can't drink your problems away because you have to face them. And when you've stopped drinking, they are still going to be there.

Try this - eat three meals a day, but healthy meals. Try salad and stuff, but cut out on the oily and sugary stuff. Don't eat in between and don't starve yourself, because that's not only unhealthy, but also dangerous.

And then - you have to accept yourself for who you are before other people can. If that makes sense. Being overweight isn't nice, I know that. (I was overweight before I became a fitness fanatic). You also have to exercise a lot. At the beginning it's really hard, but the more you go on, the easier it gets. And if you don't feel confident with going to a gym, then exercise at home. PM me if you want me to help you with an exercise program and so on, I'll be happy to!

As for being labelled - that happens at every school. In my old school I was the freaky writer kid who all the guys would have punched if I wasn't in the rugby team. But you know what, I was happy - because I was being true to myself. Don't worry about being labelled - it's stupid kids labelling you and frankly WHO GIVES A DAMN WHAT THEY THINK???

Sam... I wish I could say something to you to help. But all I can tell you is to hang in there. Things will get better. And if you want to talk about it - PM me. *Hugs*

[Zetti]

Its hard to lose parents for whatever reason. My parents split up and now I am staying with my uncle because I couldnt choose who to stay with.

My point is decisions can be hard but you have to go with the flow.