Support Group

[Ashirr-Leigh]

What age are you, if you don't mind me asking?

And rape isn't something that will ever fully be gotten over, no matter how long ago it was, that's something I can fully understand.

PM me, yeah?

[Cerise]

Sarah, it's hard to get over stuff like rape. My best friend was raped when she was 10, now she's 18 and is still really shaky around people, and practically jumps whenever there's something on the news about attacks. She was just so traumatized, and she tried to commit suicide two years ago, because of that. A lot of things were wrong in her life, and she had the same issues with her dad who never respected her and treated her like a bold bratty five year old (I'm not saying she wasn't mischievous and bratty/bitchy, by the way, but that was only because of her rape), but most of all her dad never really cared, which I find really sad.

I know how you feel about not handling it anymore, when I went into hospital when I was anorexic, there were often moment I couldn't stand being fed and weighed and all that sort of stuff (won't go into any details here) and yes, I did have suicidal thoughts, and I'm not saying I never tried... I was just found in time so they could get me treated. I wasn't grateful back then but I am now, and just don't do it, because you have so much to live for and things WILL get better You just believe it. If you ever need to talk I'm here, ok?

[Frankie]

If you are self harming then the odds are that you at a point where you feel that things are out of contorl, unbearable even, and you feel really low. Self harming may feel like a way to cope.... but there are other ways to cope and to move away from feeling bad. Some of the advice we have given to Andy about his eating is useful here.. as in a way he is self harming too.

You need to talk to someone and the first point of all is your GP... if necessary write it all down before you go... insist on seeing a counsellor. What they will do is to help you learn new ways of coping that do not harm you and also look at how you can feel better about yourself. They may also put you in touch with others who have been through or are going through what you have been through and this can often make you feel better.. you will know you are not alone... the worst thing is feeling that you are the only one to feel like this. There are specific services and supports for people who self harm and who feel suicidal.

This is a website for young people in NZ ... hope its useful for you.. I wasn't sure how old you are.

http://www.headspace.org.nz/young-people/self-harming.htm

[Ashirr-Leigh]

Rape isn't something that's just going to be dealt with easily, it's hard.. but it gets better with time. 3 years might seem like a long time ago but it really isn't. It'll be 6 years ago for me soon and there's times when it can still feel like yesterday. It affects different people in different ways.. I know it sent me out of control for a long time, and it's only recently, the past year or so, that I've calmed down a bit. You just have to find a way of channeling the anger and the pain into something good and productive.

Like other people are saying though, talking to people is the best thing you can do. Suicide may seem like a valid option but it's not, not at all.

[Guest [x]whacko[x]jen[x]]

I weighed myself today and I weigh 55 I'm so fat lol and whenever it's tea time and I say I'm not hungry my mum makes me eat more anyway I think i'm fat for being 13 And I've cut down on junk food and stuff but it's not relly helping muhc.

[homeandawayfanforeva]

I am 15 and weigh 43.5 kilos =O

[Guest [x]whacko[x]jen[x]]

Awww so I relly am fat??

[Sarah_Lewis]

Frankie: Im 18 and thanks for all the info, I've tried counselling but it didnt help at all, I cant believe i stopped for 2 years straight and started again a few months ago =[.

Kirst: thanks for letting me know i can talk to you =p it really helps me knowing people want to listen to me.

=o im 18 and weigh 82KG =o

[emmasi]

I weighed myself today and I weigh 55 I'm so fat lol and whenever it's tea time and I say I'm not hungry my mum makes me eat more anyway I think i'm fat for being 13 And I've cut down on junk food and stuff but it's not relly helping muhc.

I'm 22 and I weigh 90kg. Which is not good, but not THAT bad in the grand scheme of things. I feel fine, most of the time... except that I caught my reflection in a shop window - side on - next to my stick-thin friend... I looked like I was stalking her to eat her . But I think that's what you'd call a distorted body image. I don't think I'm particularly unhealthy, though I could definitely do with some exercise to get me fit again. I was down to about 80 a few months ago, and felt SO much better... but my parents weren't here, and I was taking care of myself. When they came back, they brought all the bad oily food with them . I wish there was some way to say "I don't want to eat rabbit food, but I don't want to eat pure animal fat either" without sounding ungreatful for whatever I'm given. They don't HAVE to feed me anything, after all...

[Oxidizer]

Everythigs wrong in my life, my dad doesnt treat me like an adult, the rape even though it was 3 years ago!! and then there's this guy who wants me to top him up all the time!, I cant handle any of it anymore =[

Have you got someone you can talk to about this offline or anyone you think you could open up to? I know it won't be as "safe" as talking about it anonymously like on here, but you need support on a physical level, you know, like someone to be there for you. I'm not suggesting or saying you're weak by needing someone else's help - far from it - but I think it'll help.

I'm not unaware that this might come off as a little hypocritical coming from me.

I really hope I've worded that right. I'm not very good at this sort of thing, sorry.