Support Group

[Summer Bay]

After nearly 2 years with my boyfriend, i finally had to end it because he would not show me he's phone. It may be silly but if he had nothing to hide than he wouldnt have had a problem with showing me. He told me that i could keep he's bed until i bought a new one, he was moving back to he's mothers.

About 2 weeks ago he txt me saying he needs he's bed back because he is moving in with "a friend"....i am really jealous and dont know how to move on. He wont even tell me who he is moving in with.

I was truelly in love with him. What makes things worse is not knowing whether or not he is hurting like i am.

I cant stop thinking about him and i am always depressed...

I am only 17, im not old. And im NOT ugly at all so i know that i will find someone else for me soon. But i cant stop thinking of him.

My head tells me to just move on and let it go, but my heart. My heart is really broken.

Please someone, help me out of this , give me some advice and help me move on. Please

[aejdude]

He probably is hurting like you are, although it's hard to tell.

Listen to your head. Your heart will heal in time.

[KaitieL]

I can understand. It's about trust and if he didn't want to show you his phone, then I would think he had something to hide as well. Or he could be just mad because he thinks you don't trust him.

Until you talk to him and sort out everything, then you won't be able to move on. Have you tried talking to him?

I know it must hurt, 2 years is along time.

So yeah, my advice is just to talk to him, sort everything out.

[claire_louise]

Just out of interest, is there a reason why you felt the need to see his phone? I don't think my boyfriend would let me check his phone either, but not because he has anything to hide, just because it's an invasion of privacy and he would take it to mean that I didn't trust him.

[Summer Bay]

I spoke to him when it all went down and he insists that he wasnt cheating. He just didnt see the issue with me looking at his phone. People may agree with him but for me, If he wasnt hiding anything than there wouldnt have been problem. I need to be with someone that i would never have to doubt. But right now i feel like he is moving on with he's life (probably with someone else) and im just stuck and going to be alone. I want to find someone aswell. I need a fresh start, but i think after everything that has happened i have been left with some serious trust issues.

[claire_louise]

I spoke to him when it all went down and he insists that he wasnt cheating. He just didnt see the issue with me looking at his phone. People may agree with him but for me, If he wasnt hiding anything than there wouldnt have been problem. I need to be with someone that i would never have to doubt. But right now i feel like he is moving on with he's life (probably with someone else) and im just stuck and going to be alone. I want to find someone aswell. I need a fresh start, but i think after everything that has happened i have been left with some serious trust issues.

Firstly, don't go rushing into another relationship just because you don't want to be on your own. If you still have feelings for your ex it will get very messy. There's nothing wrong with being single for a while - like you said, you're only young and you WILL meet someone you really like in time. Give yourself chance to get this guy out of your system first. Secondly, I hate to be blunt, but if you go around demanding to see your boyfriend's phone to check if he's cheating on you he isn't going to like it. That doesn't mean he's seeing someone behind your back, he's just angry and upset because you don't trust him! Think how you'd feel if it was the other way round, and you'd done nothing to justify him not trusting you. You have to try and trust people - despite what you might think, men don't always cheat!

[rising-flame]

LOL. I was just worried and scared of being pushed back to square one.

I know this feeling Mar. I got diagonosed with suffering from depression when I was 18 and started on prozac day after my 19th birthday (i'm turning 26 this July). Everytime i think i'm gonna come off them, something happens to send me back to square one. I think the trick is to realise that although you've been pushed back, you're not in the same place you were and the path to were you just were is clearer (does that make sense to anyone other than me).

Counselling i found useful, i also did group therapy, CBT (cognative behavioural therapy) which is all about getting yourself to think positivitly (not as dopey as it sounds).

the only thing i didn't get from counselling was the chance to lie down on a couch while talking to a therapist, mind you, if i'd done that i'd probably have fallen asleep knowing me!

If you ever wanna talk feel free to message me, sometimes just having someone listen to you can help.

[girl_from_uk]

So Im just going to do this now and it can get moved if needs be, but a friend of mine at work is really worried because afew days ago she came up with a lump just under her eye lid but at the top of the cheek area and although its gone down over the days she doesnt know whats up with it and I dont know either so Im wondering if anyone else whould know what it could be?

MOD EDIT: Merged with Support thread.

[rising-flame]

Suggest you tell your friend to go to a doctor if it's still there. The doctor may take one look and say she's been stung by an insect, it could be absolutly nothing, or if need be they can refer you to an eye specialist. But at least you're friend will know. Better to get it checked out.

[claire_louise]

There are a million and one things it could be, nearly all of them minor. It sounds like some sort of cyst, or maybe an allergic reaction? But the obvious thing to do is go to the doctor.