Support Group

[Cerise]

no matter how unrealistic people have told you, there's no reason why you can't acheive it.

That's a useful piece of advice, something someone should have told me before I went to Career Guidance. "That's a little unrealistic, don't you think, Katarin?" was what I got every meeting with every single idea I had.

[rising-flame]

what ideas did you have?

I told my careers guidance person i wanted to be an astronaut, to which i was told i was too tall (I'm not). I also consider being a fighter pilot, but that was unrealistic and unacheivable because i've suffered from migraines in the past and there's a history of them in my family they can't risk having me fly a fighter jet.

[Cerise]

Well, first I said I'd like to be a Teacher.

"Do you really think judging from your performance this year so far you'll get the grades to go into education, Katarin?" (Stop using my full name, lady.)

Then I said I'd like to do something to do with Art.

*Pulls out my art folder*

"I'm not going to lie to you, Katarin, not many Job opportunities arise with the way you draw." (That's both insulting and totally off mark. I know I can draw, WHAT I draw may not always be very realistic but I can draw whatever the hell I want. And she used my full name.)

Then I said something about liking writing.

"I can see that, but from what I've seen from your stuff you may not be able to keep up with the standard in a Journalism course, Katarin." (Like I WANT to go to Uni to study that anyway.)

I said something about liking Photography.

"Yes, but that's not a very solid career with a big wage, is it, Katarin?" (I don't care about money, and secondly, my name is Kat.)

Then I'm really sick of it and say how about I work in a cafe as a waitress for the rest of time.

"That would be perfect for you, Kat."

She was very insulting and rude.

[valli]

Seriously, she said that? That's like.... very rude I'm glad Norwegian schools don't have that sort of stuff. I don't like talking to strangers about what I want for a career. Not even my parents know what I want to be. I'm not quite sure myself

[Cerise]

I spent literally half my life in a counsellors office. So I was used to those annoying, reasonable voices. but she still did annoy the hell out of me.

[valli]

I spent literally half my life in a counsellors office. So I was used to those annoying, reasonable voices. but she still did annoy the hell out of me.

Really? I spent half my life refusing to go, even if everyone else told me that it'd be good for me Pfft, just because I have no real friends and used to cry myself to sleep, doesn't mean that it'd be good for me

[Cerise]

Ah, you do that too? So did I for most of my Secondary School life.

Yeah, I have. First when my dog died. I'm not kidding. I was so depressed at 5 I could hardly move. So I went to this special younger kids counsellor thing. Then, 14 until this very day anorexia/bulimia/depression/self esteem lack of. And then, last September until this very day, the death of my best friend. And the dreaded sessions in the guidance counsellor office, plus all the hours in the school counsellors office.

[valli]

I hate talking about serious stuff. I just can't stand it. Talking has never done me any good, other than getting me really frustrated. And I'm still not coping with the loss of my grandfather My dad told us that we should visit our grandmother and I said that I didn't want to go, he accidentally said "...visit grandmom and granddad" before he realized the mistake he had done. And that was enough to set me off for hours. I just can't face the empty chair where he used to sit

[Barbara]

^ Unfortunately, you're going to feel like that for a while. At least, you still have your grandmother and she still needs your support. Maybe you could your dad if your grandmother can't come and have dinner at your place. That way you would get to see her but you wouldn't have to face your granddad's chair.

When my granddad died, we had to empty his house because my grandmother died years before. Losing him was bad enough, especially seeing that it happened so quickly, but cleaning the house brought back all those memories and it made everything even harder. That summer was horrible! He died the day of my last exam (which I failed, the other exams weren't that great either), just a few days before my birthday (which sucked) and before we left on holiday (which wasn't that great either).

Well, first I said I'd like to be a Teacher.

"Do you really think judging from your performance this year so far you'll get the grades to go into education, Katarin?" (Stop using my full name, lady.)

Then I said I'd like to do something to do with Art.

*Pulls out my art folder*

"I'm not going to lie to you, Katarin, not many Job opportunities arise with the way you draw." (That's both insulting and totally off mark. I know I can draw, WHAT I draw may not always be very realistic but I can draw whatever the hell I want. And she used my full name.)

Then I said something about liking writing.

"I can see that, but from what I've seen from your stuff you may not be able to keep up with the standard in a Journalism course, Katarin." (Like I WANT to go to Uni to study that anyway.)

I said something about liking Photography.

"Yes, but that's not a very solid career with a big wage, is it, Katarin?" (I don't care about money, and secondly, my name is Kat.)

Then I'm really sick of it and say how about I work in a cafe as a waitress for the rest of time.

"That would be perfect for you, Kat."

She was very insulting and rude.

We don't have guidance counsellors in Belgium. We have student fairs where you can go and ask questions to people who have a certain job.

You can also take a test to see what kind of jobs would be good for you. Maybe you could take such a test if they have that where you live. I have a few friends who took it and they were pretty happy with the results.

That woman was rude and nasty. Isn't she supposed to help you? It looks like she wants to destroy your dreams. What kind of a person would do that!

[valli]

^ Unfortunately, you're going to feel like that for a while. At least, you still have your grandmother and she still needs your support. Maybe you could your dad if your grandmother can't come and have dinner at your place. That way you would get to see her but you wouldn't have to face your granddad's chair.

Wouldn't do much good. First of all because she lives too far away and is too old to be travelling that far. Second of all, just facing her makes me cry. Seeing her reminds me of him and that is what makes me cry

It's just so horrible, because my term exams and exams are coming up, so I have no time to grieve properly. I need a day where I can sit for myself and remember him the way I need to. The funeral didn't do that for me, because the minute he was buried, it looked more like a celebration than a funeral. But do you think I get that time? Nooo, because school is sooo important that I can't grieve when I need to