Support Group

[Lise]

I'm sad that you've left here, Jem. I hope you can work everything out though.

[HAA Girl 08]

It'll definitely be very lonely around here without you Jem. I hope you work everything out. xx

[adellejefferiesxox]

feeling really down about my weight. I have trouble gaining and maintaining a healthy weight....meaning I'm really skinny for someone my age... last week at work I was putting away some plates in a high up position and I was reaching up and one of the girls at work said "oh my god, you have no meat on you" whilst she said that she kind of pulled up my shirt, but I pulled away and she didn't manage to pull it right up. It hurts when people say "Omg you're so skinny" because to me it's like like "omg you're so fat!". I just wish I was a normal weight. You hear about people in the media and on the tv about losing weight, diets etc, but I have the problem of putting on weight.

Just needed to get that off my chest... feel better now.

[thelonius]

I'm really sad you're leaving Jem as I've loved reading some of your posts and your insights. But I'm happy for you that you're able to move on. I hope you're able to work through everything you need and sincerely wish you all the best *hugs*

[Hannah-K]

feeling really down about my weight. I have trouble gaining and maintaining a healthy weight....meaning I'm really skinny for someone my age... last week at work I was putting away some plates in a high up position and I was reaching up and one of the girls at work said "oh my god, you have no meat on you" whilst she said that she kind of pulled up my shirt, but I pulled away and she didn't manage to pull it right up. It hurts when people say "Omg you're so skinny" because to me it's like like "omg you're so fat!". I just wish I was a normal weight. You hear about people in the media and on the tv about losing weight, diets etc, but I have the problem of putting on weight.

Just needed to get that off my chest... feel better now.

i have no experience in this but is it because you might be stressed or have you never been able to put weight on.

i wouldn't worry about it. its your own body, so only you as to feel comfortable about yourself.

hope you feel better soon

[Lise]

Steph, you know I had the same problem but It's always hard when it's all over the media about people having trouble losing weight when you have the exact opposite problem. I don't have a solution for you but try not to let people get you down. They seriously aren't worth the effort. What other people think of you is insignificant - it's only what you think about yourself that matters. I know what your talking about when pepole say your skinny. I hate the word. It's as bad as calling someone fat but people don't seem to realise that.

I feel like I need to get something off my chest, too. Lately I seem to be having more and more days where I'm just down. I'm already on a very low dose of anti-depressants to try and control my anxiety (I went through a period last year where I had a string of panic attacks). It's the littleist things that set them off, too. These days just tend to be a write off because I can't get motivated to do anything so I just end up staying at home doing nothing. It's just a waste of a whole day. The good thing is that my Mum seems to be really aware of these days now but there isn't really anything she can do it about them.

[adellejefferiesxox]

Thank you Lise & Hannah K I really do appreciate your responses.

I have no idea what has caused my weight loss, sometimes I don't feel like eating and I think that is mainly to do with stress so sometimes I'll skip meals. I'm often stressed due to the fact my mother drinks a lot(and smokes) that bothers me. Also she is very critical of me. I'm not sure if you can define it as "emotional/psyogical abuse" but sometimes it feels that way....

When I was in high school I would suffer from panic attacks.

I just want to be a normal weight regardless of what people say. I want to feel good about the way I look.

[bubbleburst]

omg I just found out that my sister is gay!!!! I'm freakin out!!!! She told my parents and they hit the rooof!!!! I'm scared I'm losing my sister, how can she be gay for godness sakes!!! I'm known her all my life, not once did I see this coming! Some of my friends are phobic of gay people So I'm scared to tell them my sister is gay. What do I do??????????!!!!!

[bikinikill]

Hey

This is tough, thinking you knew someone so well, but then not seeing this coming. Its important to remember, that your sister is still your sister. No matter what she is still your sister. Give your parents time, they need to come to terms with it in their own way. And as for your friends, you don't have to tell them, thats your sister's decision. And I suggest talking to your sister about telling people beforer you do, she might want to tell them herself, she might not be ready to share it with people external to her family yet. So let her guide you about that, because that is her decision. And truly, its not your friends business at all. Not even a little bit.

Its tough, but just make sure you keep your communication lines open with your sister and your parents and you will get through it.

Take care.

[thelonius]

I can understand why you're scared about finding out your sister is gay because it is so embedded in society that being attracted to the same sex is not "right". But just think, how does this really change your sister? How do you really lose her because she likes girls instead of boys? I don't know your sister but if she's nice, mean, funny, serious, shy, outgoing, whatever - being gay doesn't change that. All it means is she will be attracted to girls rather than boys. It doesn't have to affect you unless you make it.

Given how badly your parents took the news, your sister must be so brave to have taken the steps to be true to herself. Think about how she must be feeling. Imagine if the world were the other way around and it was normal to be gay or lesbian and you were attracted to the opposite sex. How would you feel? Could you force yourself to love girls? It's something that's completely out of her control.

What you tell your friends is your decision but just ask yourself whether or not they are friends worth having if they would judge YOU on something that is out of your control. I agree with bikinikill that perhaps it's up to her to share the news when she wants to share it.