Behind Closed Doors

[allibaz91]

Thanks loads, Lil, Chrissie and Jess

Right, sort-of-teaser-type-thing

I made this before the other one and realised after that it had spoilers, so I couldn't use it then, and had to make the other one

So you can have it now.

[allibaz91]

Right, you can have a long update!

I say long, it's not that long, but longer than usual

Chapter 38

“How long can it possibly take for them to be able to tell us something?!” Clare paced up and down the corridor, twirling her hair, as she always did when she was nervous. Peter was sitting with his head in his hands, but at the sound of her voice, he glanced up. He reached out and took her hand, pulling her down into the seat next to him.

“The doctors are doing everything they can for her,” he said soothingly, but his voice was hoarse even to his own ears. It had been over an hour since anybody had spoken.

“What if that’s not enough?” Clare whispered.

He didn’t have an answer for her. He sighed and held her in his arms tight, and kissed the top of her head lovingly. Thankfully, she didn’t seem to have noticed the dirty looks Dan was still shooting the pair of them. A few moments later, she sat up slowly.

“I, uh … I’m going to go get something to drink, do you want anything?” she asked.

“No, I’m okay,” Peter said, stroking her face. “Remember – positive thinking, yeah?”

“Yeah,” she repeated, trying to smile, but he could see that she didn’t really believe it. The second she was out of earshot, he was on his feet, grabbing Dan by the arm.

“You and I need to talk,” he said angrily, and dragged his brother into an empty room. The door swung closed behind them, and Dan turned to face him.

“Well?” he said coldly. Peter scoffed loudly, pacing the room restlessly.

“Well, what do you think?” he snapped. “You think either of us needs this any more than you do right now? You don’t think I wish things had worked out differently, too?!”

“Oh, I don’t know, Pete – everything seems to have worked out pretty damn well, for you! You’ve got Drew back; you and Clare are together again, although Christ knows how that even happened; you’re going to be a dad again; you’ve got your life back! Everything, as usual, has turned out exactly as you’d like it to – congratulations, big brother!”

“Oh, yeah, that’s right, Dan, you figured it all out! I really wanted my son to be tormented by gangsters and my family torn apart – I actually enjoyed living under a false name, not being able to see the most important people in my life! What a bloody genius you are!”

“You’re telling me you don’t like having Clare back? That Drew thinks you’re a hero?”

“That Lucy might be dying?!” Peter shouted. That stopped his brother in his tracks. “No, you never thought of that minor detail, did you? I wish more than anything that none of this had ever happened – yes, okay, you got me: I’m glad Clare’s back in my life, because she is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And I’m glad to have a second chance with Drew, because all I’ve wanted for five years is a chance to get to know him! But don’t you dare accuse me of wanting things to work out this way, because if I had my way, I would never have gone into Witness Protection in the first place! That wasn’t the way I wanted any of this to happen, but it has, and all I’m doing is trying to make the best of a bad situation. But all you seem to want to do is to make the bad situation worse!”

“That’s really where you were?”

Suddenly Dan’s voice was calm again. He looked at Peter like he hadn’t for years – since they were kids, Peter thought. Like he actually respected him. Like … like something he had done, or something he had to say, was of some significance. Almost an awed look.

“Yeah …” he said, bemused. “I already told you: Sam Murphy put in the order while I was unconscious; I didn’t have any say in the matter. If I had, I wouldn’t have gone.”

“I know, I just … I thought you only said that to cover your back,” Dan admitted.

“No. If I wanted to cover my back, I would’ve invented something that made me come off sounding much better than: ‘I spent three months in a house in the middle of nowhere recovering from the burns I got in the fire.’ Doesn’t portray me in the best light.”

“I guess not …”

“Look, Dan, I don’t blame you for being angry with me, okay?” Peter said. “And I don’t even blame you for being angry at Clare. But Lucy … she’s Clare’s niece, and her sister doesn’t even like her all that much. She’s basically the only family Clare has left. I was left alone with her for a couple of days, way back, and … I don’t know. Luce never had her own father around, and apparently I’m the closest she ever got. She looks up to me, Dan, she sees me as a father figure. Clare’s like a mother to her. And we love her as much as any biological parents would, too. The last thing we need when we’re this worried about her is for you to be causing more tensions. And I don’t think Drew wants it either.”

“You really do want a chance with him, don’t you?” Dan said, sounding thoughtful.

“More than anything,” Peter admitted.

“Peter?” There was a soft knock on the door, and Natalie appeared looking nervous.

“What’s up, Nat?” he asked her, shooting Dan a look to silence his curiosity.

“Uh, I just spoke to the paramedics who brought Lucy in. I mean, they don’t know what happened yet, but … Oh, Pete. Did you tell them you were her father?”

“I’m the best she has, Nat,” Peter answered, ignoring Dan’s shocked look, and the fact that she groaned aloud. “Somebody had to take responsibility for her then and there, and who else was going to do it? I couldn’t exactly tell them about Julie – you saw her earlier! She doesn’t give a damn about Lucy and never has. Clare and I are her best hope.”

“You know Julie can have you arrested for this? Assuming a false identity, and all?”

“Yeah, what about what I’ve been doing the last three months?” he joked. Dan sighed.

“Peter, this is serious,” Natalie informed him. “How are you going to explain to Clare?”

“Clare knows exactly how I feel. She loves Lucy like a daughter, same as I do. She’ll support me in looking out for her. Somebody has to.”

Clare came through the open door just then, and closed it wordlessly behind her.

“Are you okay?” Peter asked, moving closer to her, and ignoring Dan’s pointed look in the opposite direction. Clare nodded, trying to force a smile, as he slipped his arms around her waist and pulled her close to him. She sighed and looked up into his eyes.

“I, uh … I made an ultrasound appointment,” she said quietly. Peter was surprised to see that she had done something so definite about their child, but that was nothing compared to the shock he registered passing across Dan’s face in the corner.

“You did? When is it?” he asked, brushing some hair out of her eyes. “Which doctor?”

“I don’t know which doctor it is, but it’s in two weeks,” she told him. Right now, it was like there was nobody else in the room. All that mattered was them, and their family.

“You’ll go with me, right?” she asked, her voice wavering for just a moment. He grinned.

“Wild horses couldn’t keep me away,” he promised, and he kissed her lovingly. This proved too much for Dan, who stalked past them and out of the room. Natalie quietly excused herself and followed him, closing the door after her. Clare smiled faintly.

“I’m sorry it took me this long to come to my senses,” she said softly. He kissed her.

“All that matters is that you have,” he replied. She looked at him for a moment before leaning up and kissing him tenderly again. As he kissed her back, he felt an immense but inexplicable wave of love for her washing over him all over again.

The door flew open right then, causing them to spring apart guiltily. Drew stood there, and his expression was unreadable. He didn’t say a word. After a few moments of awkward silence, Clare cleared her throat pretty loudly, and turned to Peter again.

“I’ll leave you to it,” she said quietly. “I want to see how Lucy’s doing, anyway.”

“Thanks …” Peter said, and she left. Drew just stared at him for several very long, very uncomfortable moments, until it really began to get on his nerves.

“Look, I’m sorry about that,” he said finally. Drew couldn’t seem to control himself any more, and he snorted with laughter, leaning casually against the doorframe.

“Man, the looks on your faces!” he chuckled. “Now that was priceless.” Peter laughed.

“Yeah, all right, you’re hilarious, mate,” he joked. “What was it you wanted, anyway?”

“Uh, I just … I really hope Lucy’s okay,” Drew said seriously. “I mean, if it weren’t for her I reckon you would’ve died back there. And you guys seem to care about her a lot.”

“Yeah, well, she’s like a daughter to Clare and me,” Peter admitted.

“Well if she’s anything like Clare, I reckon she’ll pull through. She seems tough.”

“She can be,” Peter laughed. “I seem to have a habit of always going for the awkward ones. Stubborn; proud; headstrong; complete pain in the neck … and yet, I can’t seem to stop loving her for anything. And Lucy’s exactly like her, just fifteen years later.”

“Then you shouldn’t have to worry about whether she’ll make it,” Drew insisted.

“Thank you,” Peter said, looking into his son’s eyes. “It means a lot to me that you’re sticking around here with us. You know, we’re all family now, like it or not.”

“I do like it, Dad.”

Peter smiled a little, and he and his son shared a semi-awkward hug. When Drew pulled away, however, he was grinning bashfully, and the self-consciousness passed.

“So!” he said, grinning. “I’m going to get a brother or sister pretty soon, then?”

“Yeah, I guess so!” Peter laughed. He hadn’t even thought of how it would affect Drew.

“That’s awesome. Seriously, I really, couldn’t be happier for you guys. I mean that.”

“Thanks, Drew,” Peter said, meaning it from the bottom of his heart.

“So, uh, are you coming back to Dan and Leah’s tonight or are you staying here?” Drew asked him, changing to a more light-hearted subject. Peter stopped in his tracks.

“Uh, I’m not sure …” he said honestly. “But, you know, I can’t just up sticks and move into Dan and Leah’s house. I mean, I have Clare and Lucy to think of too.”

“But I thought … you said you wanted us to get to know each other!” Drew said angrily.

“Yeah, and I do, mate!” Peter insisted. “I’d love that! But they’re my family too – they’re your family now! I can’t very well abandon them: not with Clare pregnant and Lucy ill!”

“So all that stuff about me being the most important thing was bull?” Peter had never seen Drew so upset, he didn’t think. “I thought you were putting me first! Turns out I’ll always be second best to someone. If it’s not your brother, it’s your girlfriend.”

“Drew, you are not second best! But Clare is carrying my child, okay? That baby, your brother or sister, is going to mean as much to me as you do, but not more or less! I thought you understood that!”

“All I understand is, something else is getting in the way of you giving a damn about me, just for a change,” Drew spat. “I can’t believe I actually thought you’d changed.”

“Drew …” Peter couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “You know I love you, mate!”

“Then prove it.” His son’s voice shook, but he didn’t back down. “You’ve been telling me for years you wanted us to have a father-son relationship. Well I’m giving you the chance, Dad. If you choose not to take it then that’s your call. But don’t use your new Insta-Family as an excuse. Either you want this to work or you don’t. And you know what you have to do if you do. It’s your call.” A moment later, Drew was gone, and Peter was left standing alone in the dark. What the hell was he going to do now?

*runs away from Lil*

[Lilone]

Awwww awesome update I loved it!

Still don't know about Lucy though! but then again on msn you did say you was going to drag it out

Update soon

[swfc]

First off, I need to say, thanks very much for the *cough*reward*cough*. Absolutely loved them.

Drew going all angsty... Not surprised at all. I still think that he's being a tad bit selfish but can't blame him for it.

I'm glad that Dan has finally grown a brain. Let's hope he's not going to continue to be a thorn.

Love the Clete scenes. Very adorable. But, a tad bit too mushy for me in this chapter. Don't know why.... Loved Drew's interruption. You really love doing that, don't you?

Hope Lucy pulls through but I really hope that you don't drag it out for too long.

Update soon.

[Mrs Bishop]

Fabulas update Ali more soon.

God what I,d give to slap Julie she dosent deserve a child.

[Jess]

Yay! Update!

Sorry it's taken me so long to get around to reading it... hecticness.

I reallllly hope Lucy pulls through. Grrr, first we had Dan being a jerk and now Drew.

Loved it, though, Alli.

[allibaz91]

Thanks loads Lil, Chrissie, Janice and Jess!

Must apologise for late update - have had tons of school stuff on with new timetable starting and all!

Summer hols start next week, so hopefully things will settle and updates will be more frequent

And to make up for lateness - nice and long *cough* Lil's a bully *cough*

Chapter 39

“Hey …” Clare half-rose from her seat as Peter joined her in the corridor a few minutes later, having taken time to compose himself before rejoining her. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” he lied, looking around. No sign of Drew. “Drew and I were just talking.”

“Did he rip into you?” she asked quietly. He stared at her blankly. “You know, about him walking in on us kissing?” Clare prompted. He shook himself and faked a smile.

“Actually, I think he found it funny,” Peter said honestly. “He’s a good kid.”

“I guess he has a lot in common with his old man,” she joked. When Peter found himself unable to laugh, her facial expression changed from forced-smiling to concerned.

“Pete, are you sure everything’s okay with us?” she asked unsurely. “I mean, I thought that everything went well with Drew?”

“It did,” he said, but he knew she could see right through him, as ever.

“Look, if it’s something he asked you not to say then I understand, but all you have to do is say that to me. I’d rather know that, than have you lying to me completely.”

“I just, it … it wasn’t about lying to you, I … I just don’t know any more.” Peter sank slowly into one of the hard plastic chairs, and Clare resumed her own seat next to him, and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, rubbing it lightly.

“Talk to me.”

He leant back and let out a deep breath, and glanced sideways into her eyes. All he saw looking back was anxiety, and something he was pretty confident was love.

“I love you …” he whispered, as he felt his chest tighten. “You know that, right?”

“Of course,” Clare said hesitantly. “Pete, you’re scaring me – what is going on?”

“Drew, he … he really likes you, and I honestly reckon he’s totally fine with Lucy being around too. I think. That is, just as long as I put him before either of you.”

“So?” Peter looked up, stunned, and found Clare with one eyebrow raised, looking down at him – his head had slowly sunk into his hands – seeming amused.

“What do you mean, ‘so’?” he repeated slowly, looking into her eyes. She smiled.

“Look, I … I love you too, Pete,” she said firmly. “But I knew a long time ago that you came as a package deal. I’m still here, aren’t I? If putting Drew first right now is what you need to do, then put him first. When he’s ready to make a compromise, well, you know, I’ll still be here. It’s not like I’m going anywhere in a hurry. Not alone.”

“Yeah, but it isn’t just about you and Lucy any more. This baby – I mean, Drew will always be my firstborn, and I’ll never stop loving him. But I’m going to love this kid – our, kid – just as much. And I have a responsibility to him or her too. I can’t ignore that.”

“Nobody’s asking you to choose, Peter …” Clare said carefully, and he scoffed.

“Drew is! He reckons me loving you guys means I don’t love him – that I don’t want to get to know him. He doesn’t realise that’s all I’ve wanted for … since I knew about him.”

“Then you have to do it.” He could hear her voice wavering, but when he caught her gaze, her jaw was set. “Look, I never thought I’d be saying this, but … this baby isn’t going to be born for another seven to eight months. That’s seven or eight months you could be spending bonding with your son. And he wants that. You can’t pass up this chance.”

“You’re saying you want to split up?”

Clare seemed stung, and he saw the tears pricking at her eyelids.

“It’s not what I want,” she said quietly. “But it’s what you have to do. And I can’t lose you again. So if taking some time out to be with Drew is what’s best for you right now, then I’ll support you. And we’ll get through it. I mean, we’ve survived Gillan … haven’t we?”

“Of course we have!” Peter pulled her as close to him as the plastic seats would allow, and he held her there for what seemed like hours. “All this … it’s not about Gillan. It’s just family stuff. I’m just so sorry I left you the way I did. I didn’t want to …”

“I know,” she assured him. “It’s okay. It just proves to me that you’d do anything for your kids. Our kid. And breaking up isn’t what I want. But maybe it’s the only way right now.”

“Clare, I …”

“Don’t,” she whispered. “I don’t want to think about it. I have to focus on Lucy now.”

“Just don’t go getting yourself worked up,” he warned her. “No stress for Baby Baker.”

“Hey, who said it was Baby Baker?” Clare demanded. “What about Baby Brody?”

“Baby Brody-Baker?” Peter compromised. Clare laughed and nudged him jokingly.

“I was teasing,” she grinned. “Baby Baker suits me just fine. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. This baby – boy or girl – is having its father’s name. I’ve decided.”

“Well, looking at this family, we’ve had nothing but boys for a while,” he observed.

“On the other hand, maybe you’re about due a girl,” she retorted.

They were sitting joking about baby names – Clare’s latest classic: ‘Ursula’ – when Drew appeared around the corner. Peter caught his eye and immediately, the laughter died on his lips. Drew turned and stalked in the other direction, and Peter shot a pleading look at Clare. She smiled, although he knew deep down, her heart was breaking the way his was.

“Go,” she told him. “Catch him up.” Peter squeezed her hand for a moment, then took off down the corridor after his son, finding him just around the corner and down a bit, staring into space and leaving against the wall. Peter leant beside him, looking straight ahead.

“What’s so interesting you’re looking at it?” he asked casually. Drew scowled.

“Go back to Clare,” he snapped. “You’ve obviously made your choice. You know mine.”

“Have you asked Dan?” Peter interrupted. “About me moving in with you?”

“It was Leah who suggested it,” his son admitted sullenly. “I just assumed you’d want to.”

“I do,” Peter said, knowing in that moment, things had spiralled out of his control.

“Yeah, you want to, but you have other responsibilities; Clare comes first; Lucy’s not well; you have a new baby to consider – you already told me all this!”

“No, I mean I want to move in, period,” Peter said. “As soon as you’d like.”

Drew looked at his dad for a moment, and Peter smiled weakly.

“Look, I’m not about to pretend it doesn’t hurt me to leave Clare and Lucy when they need me,” he said slowly. “But you’re my son. The only thing to rival that is this new baby – and that won’t be an issue for a fair few months yet. Maybe, we can just agree to play it by ear for now, and deal with the rest as it comes?” Drew was silent. “I’m trying, mate. I want more than anything for us to have a relationship. Meet me halfway?”

“Okay …” Finally, Drew responded. “And this is it? Your final decision?”

“Like I said, mate. You’re my son. This is important to me too, you know.”

“I do know.” To Peter’s surprise, Drew pulled him into a brotherly embrace. He closed his eyes and hugged his son, immensely grateful for this chance.

When he opened his eyes again, Drew was still hugging him, but over his son’s shoulder, he could see Clare. She leant against she corner of the wall, watching the father and son making peace. Peter met her eyes, and she gave him a watery smile.

‘I love you,’ she mouthed. She then turned and walked away in the other direction.

“Come on, Dad,” Drew grinned. “Let’s go tell Dan and Leah the good news!”

“Yeah, mate. I’d like that,” Peter said, tearing his eyes away from the spot where Clare had stood. “I’d like that a lot.”

[Lilone]

lil the Bully

OMG that was so cute

Poor Clare

But I'm s glad Pete has choose Drew.

Baby Pete

you have to update soon

friggin loved it

Pete

[Mrs Bishop]

Another baby Baker oh how lovley Drew will come round in the end.

great up date Ali some more soon [leasssse

[swfc]

First and foremost, I am not happy at all with this chapter...

Peter has to choose between Drew and Clare.... It's not fair. He shouldn't be made to choose. Drew's a stubborn, spoilt brat for this, I can tell you that.

I cannot believe you broke up Clete... It's seriously a No No.... Why is it that Clare has to sacrifice everything just so that he can be happy? It's no fair.

Apart from that, the good thing about it is:

The awesome Clete scenes and Baby Baker was really

Update soon, Alli.