Eli Posted April 3, 2007 Report Posted April 3, 2007 Really good fic, Cal, I have been waiting for a fic about a gang in black! It's really well written, I don't usually like fics written as a script, but you do it well (and I have a weird taste when it comes to litterature). I would however recommend you in the future to write like a novel/shortstory (not script), simply because you use a lot of cursives to describe situations, and if you ask me these makes it harder to read as you constantly have to change the point you're reading from. Scripts work better if you don't have many feelings and expressions like you do, just plain actions and dialogue. Also you changed from present to past tense in your cursives somewhere through chapter 2. This is a mistake almost everyone does, so you're not alone! I think present tense (like the dialogue) makes it easier to read the text with the cursives. Don't get me wrong, I really do like this fic, and I will continue reading your updates to see where this is going. Also I think the length of your chapters is good. I hardly ever read any long fics anymore, cause I get so easily bored (no offence, I have problems concentrating, so it's me, not you!) and never read the chapters properly because they're too long. I really like the storyline, and how this story is developing, I can't wait to see how it goes! PS. I hope you don't mind constructive criticism, it's just that I like to write longer, more detailed responses to fics, instead of short replies with only the good stuff. The reason? I know how much good reviewing can help you become a better writer. It saved my Norwegian grade. I don't know if my reviews are any good or helpful at all, but I hope so! Quote
Sarah_Lewis Posted April 3, 2007 Author Report Posted April 3, 2007 Lol when Beth said are you getting hung, it made laugh lol haha, Awesome update Cal cant wait to read more =]] Quote
Cal Posted April 4, 2007 Report Posted April 4, 2007 (edited) Thanks, Guys! Really good fic, Cal, I have been waiting for a fic about a gang in black! It's really well written, I don't usually like fics written as a script, but you do it well (and I have a weird taste when it comes to litterature). I would however recommend you in the future to write like a novel/shortstory (not script), simply because you use a lot of cursives to describe situations, and if you ask me these makes it harder to read as you constantly have to change the point you're reading from. Scripts work better if you don't have many feelings and expressions like you do, just plain actions and dialogue. Also you changed from present to past tense in your cursives somewhere through chapter 2. This is a mistake almost everyone does, so you're not alone! I think present tense (like the dialogue) makes it easier to read the text with the cursives. Don't get me wrong, I really do like this fic, and I will continue reading your updates to see where this is going. Also I think the length of your chapters is good. I hardly ever read any long fics anymore, cause I get so easily bored (no offence, I have problems concentrating, so it's me, not you!) and never read the chapters properly because they're too long. I really like the storyline, and how this story is developing, I can't wait to see how it goes! PS. I hope you don't mind constructive criticism, it's just that I like to write longer, more detailed responses to fics, instead of short replies with only the good stuff. The reason? I know how much good reviewing can help you become a better writer. It saved my Norwegian grade. I don't know if my reviews are any good or helpful at all, but I hope so! Eli, I find it quite difficult not to write in script. It must be just me. I had a feeling that I changed the tense, damn! Thanks so much for the tips and reply. Much appreciated! Edited April 4, 2007 by -Cal- Quote
Eli Posted April 4, 2007 Report Posted April 4, 2007 The first fic you posted here wasn't a script, was it? I think you were really good at writing that way too! But I know what you mean, it can be hard, and sometimes I just wanna start writing script instead Quote
Cal Posted April 4, 2007 Report Posted April 4, 2007 Yeah, Gale Force wasn't script. But I found that very hard to write....even though it was pure crap. Next chapter soon! Quote
Eli Posted April 4, 2007 Report Posted April 4, 2007 This is just getting better and better! I'm in a different universe when I read this fic, you're really good at cupturing your readers, Cal! Can't wait for an update Quote
Sarah_Lewis Posted April 4, 2007 Author Report Posted April 4, 2007 That was awesome Cal, LOL Laura's hair fell out =] Update soon =]] Quote
Sarah_Lewis Posted April 4, 2007 Author Report Posted April 4, 2007 That was awesome Cal, LOL Laura's hair fell out =] Update soon =]] Quote
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