All That I Want Is All That You Are

[xchazx]

Chapter 8

Mid-day Sunday.

Luc's dad has invited Mattie round for dinner to apologise properly about Jack's behaviour. What she doesn't know is that Jack will also be there. She is ready to forget and move on but Jack isn't. Will Jack see sense and accept her, it is very doubtful...

Mattie's P.O.V.

Luc has just let me in. I kiss him and he cuddles me.

'Alryt you two thats enough of that!' i feel my face go red, Luc's dad jokes. Luc just laughs.

'Matilda I am so sorry for the way Jack acted and treated you last night. I think it was just the emotions running high, you know what with it being the anniversary...'

'It's ok Tony can we just forget it. It's in the past' I cut him short, it was in the past for me.

Ten minutes later...

Luc's P.O.V.

Jack has just arrive, I instantly grab Mattie. lead her towards the sofa and protectively put my arms around her.

Jack looks at Mattie in disgust, wht can't he just leave it? I know he is my brother but he doesn't even know Mattie, he hasn't given her a chance.

'What are we here for dad?' Jack asks.

'To have a meal, that is not awkward or tense and for you to apologise properly to Matilda. She ash done nothing wrong and you treat her disgracefully. I will not have anyone treated like that.You better be civil and repsectful to her Jack!' My dad tells him, finally he might get the message.

'I don't have to apologise, I don't have to do anything thankyou father. Now can we eat' i can feel the anger inside me building up. I turn Mattie around to face me and she looks worried and upset.

'Hey none of this is your fault baby. He is being an idiot, don't worry I promise that there will never be a repeat of last night. Just ignore hime, if he is to ignorant to see what n incredible person you are then it is his problem not yours' I whisper to her. She looks thankingly at me.

I pull her close to me and just hold her. Jack makes a 'urghhhh' sound and I shoot evils at him. Why can't he just be happy that I have found someone? I can't deal with much more of this. I know he is my brother but I love Mattie and if he can't accept that then I may welll have to reconcider my relationship with him.

'Let's eat' dad says which breaks the tension building up.

45 minutes later....

'Are you sure you don't want me to wash up?' Mattie asks my dad. SH eis so conciderate.

'No love you are a guest' He replies. Godd she shouldn't have to.

Jack comes back into the kitchen.

'Mattie come on we will watch T.V. whilst the others washa and dry' you are a guest and you are my guest so neither of us have to do it' I tell her trying to keep her away from Jack, he is still being a complete arse towards her.

'So that's why you invited me here to get yourself out of doing the washing up' she jokes.

'Damn, you caught me' I laugh.

We walk to the sofa, sit down and watch some T.V.

I can hear jack moaning about why she isn't doing teh washing or why she hasn't offered. I wish he would just shut up. I turn the T.V. up to drown it out so she doesn't hear it, but it's too late she already has.

'Luc I told you I should have done the washing up. Maybe then he wuold like me' why does Jack hvae to be like this about her.

'Mattie ignore him. He isn't worth it.' I tell.

'Luc he is your brother, of course he is worth it.' why does she have to be so nice.

'Mattie come here. as long as we love each other then it doesn't matter about anybody else.' I grab her and pull her as close to me as possible.

'Do you quite mind, I would like to watch some T.V. but I can't with you and your little bitch all over each other, it's quite off putting' Jack shouts.

'Shut it Jack. She is a little bitch, she is incredible and beautiful and I love her. So just leave her alone!!' I shout back.

'Love her ? I don't think so, you just love the sex! Surely you do have some standards Luc. Come on she isn't much to look at is she. Is she good in bed ? She must be why else would you be with her!' how dare he. Who the hell does he think he is.

'Come on Mattie I'll take you home. I am not having you listen to him'. We stand up but I have to say something to Jack.

'Jack, you know nothing about her. She is beautiful and gorgeous and for your information we haven't slept together it's not like that!!Will you just but out, I am sick of you shouting her down, you don't even know her you haven't given her a chance, so what exactly gives you the right to judge her. You always make assumptions based on what exactly? Your personal experiances? Cause lets face it, we all know how easy your girlfriends have been. Don't we!' his face drops, he steps forward and it looks like he is about to hit Mattie, whilst trying to im for me.I push Mattie out of the way onto the sofa and get his full forced punch into my stomach. I fall on top of Mattie and it really starts to hurt.

'Jack get out!!' dad shouts.

'Luc I'm sorry. I don't know...' he runs off.

Mattie wriggles from underneath of me, she sits me upstraight, her face full of worry.

'Luc are you ok? Stupid question I know , does it really hurt. I'm sorry that is another stupid quest....' she is rambling.

'Mattie I'm ok and they are not stupid at all. It shows me that you care' I tell her.

'It doesn't hurt that much, it is just sore more than anythiing' I tell her trying to reassure her.

'Come on I will take you home' I say.

'No Luc, it is ok you stay here' dad ahs just given me a ice pack.

'NO!!!! I am taking you home' I almost command to her, she looks upset.

'Sorry Mattie. I just want to make sure that you get hoem ok, now come on' I tell her reassuringly.

'Ok' she says unconvinced.

I walk her to her door, obvious that I am in pain.

'You shouldn't have come Luc. I only live next door. You should have stayed at home.' she tells me.

'No I wanted to Mattie, end of conversation' I tell her back.

'Ok, well thankyou for sticking up for me and for protecting me. Luc I love you so much you know that don't you' she asks, that is odd for her, she is acting like normal, hardly surprising I suppose.

'Of course I do. I love you to, now come here' I pull he close adn kiss her with all the passion my body has got. I go to pull away but she pulls me back and continues to kiss me. This is our longest kiss ever.

She hugs me and I moan in pain. She goes to pull away. I pull her back, all I want is to hold her, the pain subdues quickly anyway.

'Bye Mattie love you' I say after breaking off our hug.

'Bye Luc adn I love you no matter what' she replies to me, there is definately something up with her.

I walk home and go and lye on my bed.

A while later....

Mattie's P.O.V.

As I sit here in my room, I just don't know what I should do. I have to end it.

I have to end things with Luc. He is going to end up hating his brother all because of me. I am not worth it, he will see that.

I love him so much though, I can't imagine being without him. I never thought that I would have to, but his family has to be more important to him than me. He can get other girlfriends but he can't get another brother or family. It is for the beest. No matter how many times I tell myself that, it doesn't make it any easier. I have to do this, for him.I just have to.

I can't tell him face to face because I won't be able to do it to him. I have to text him.

'Hi Luc,Mattie here. I am rlly sory but we cant b 2getha nemore...I begin to cry...I love you more than anything and I no you love me 2 but you will find someone else. I dnt want you 2 end up hating your own brother because of me. you can get another girlfriend but you cant get another brother. you of all people know how important you fmily is. i cant b the reason for you hating your brother. Never forget that no matter what I do and always will love you Mattie xx' I send it and grab my pillow and just sob my heart out I don't know what else to do. I don't know what else I could have done...

Luc's P.O.V.

My phone vibrates in my pocket. It's Mattie, the sight of her name on my phone gives me butterflies.

I read it and begin to cry. The door goes I hope it's Mattie to say that it was a mistake but it turns out to be Jack. It's all his fault, I don't even want to see him never mind speak to him.

'Luc, come here please' dad shouts. It hurt sto move but I can deal with pain in my stomach its the pain in my heart that hurts more. I dry my eyes and walk out.

'Luc I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...its just, she is not good enough for you, I don't like her she seems selfish and easy, despite what you say you are sleeping with her.It's not love it's lust Luc' I tense up what exactly does he know?

'Well Jack for your information, she is not a slag or easy, we haven't slept together we haven't even talked about sex. I do love her and she is not selfish, but because of you she ahs ended things with me. She said that she would rather I found someone else and not end up hating you, than stay with her and hate you. Does that sound like a selfish peson to you Jack?' he smiles.

'So you want to go out soemwhere, find yourself a real girl, one who is good enugh for you and who will be good for you.' he is unbelieveable, he doesn't even care.

'No Jack I don't. I am going to Mattie's to try and persuade her to go back out with me. I don't care what you think anymore Jack. I love her, she would rather hurt herself than have me upset, she is incredible and I don't deserve her.So either you acceot it Jack or you don't, but if you don't I don't want anything to do with you until you can' I tell him seriously.

'Luc come on she is just some girl, there will be plenty of better ones out there for you. Your not going to stopp talking to me over a girl. I am your brother, I am way more important than some little slag.' he just doesn't get it.

'No Jack you just think you are. I love Mattie and I am going to get her back, you can act how you want I am past caring about you Jack, but if Mattie is with us you better not ever speak to her the way you did today or yesterday. I have always been there for you Jack, I have never judged any of your girlfriends so I don't understand why you can't. Either you accept me and Mattie or get out of my life until you can!!' I shout loudly at him.

'Dad I am going to Mattie's I have to get her back dad I just have to' I tell him.

'Good luck son' dad tells me.

I go to walk towards the dorr and hear dad shouting at Jack.

I knock on Mattie's door...

Mattie's P.O.V

10 Minutes previously.

I can't help but cry I don't know what I am going to do. Ring Rach, that's what I have to do. She will be able to help me.

'Rach, I just dumped Luc, even though I didn't want to...

It takes me about 5 minutes to explain. She starts to gie me advice. She asks if I want her to come over, buti don't want to disturb her even more so I decline.

'Thanks Rach love you and I'll see you tmorrow' I say pushing the 'end call' button on the phone.

I start to think about Luc, I begin to cry again. I can't help it, I love him so much, but its for the best, I keep telling myself that in the hope that I might actually believe it.

There is a knock at the door.

'Ill get it' mum shouts. It can't be Rach, I wonder who it could be.

Then I hear his voice, Oh no its Luc. I can't deal with him right now.

'She is in her room go through Lucas dear' oh no mum has invited him in and worse than that she ahs told him to come in to my room.

He knocks and enters. I try to dry my eyes, but he sees me. I try not too look at him, at the hurt in his eyes, I just want to hold him right now but I know I can't, it ouldn't be fair on him.

'Mattie, why Mattie. I thought you said you really loved me. Am I that easy to give up on' how could he ever think that, does he have any idea what it was like having to send that text.

I don't answer, I can't no matter what I say it will hurt him. He moves closer and sits on my bed.

'Mattie plese, you could at least explain why. I know you said about Jack but i don't care about him' of course he cares, thats his brother.

'Look Luc, I did what I did. I told you wht I did it. MAybe I didn't love you as much as I made out, your right you are that easy to give up on, now if you don't mind' I see the hurt in his eyes.

'Mattie how could you say that' does he think any of this has been easy.

'Isn't that what you wanted to hear?' I say not knowing what else to say.

'No I thought you loved me as much as I love you, turns out Jack was right, you aren't worth it' it's better this way, if he hayes me then it willease his pain and he can move on.

'Jack was right then wasn't he how fantastic now get out!' I shout hoping he hurries up as I don't want him to see me cry.

He walks out and shuts the door, I sob my heart out, there is no chance of us getting back together now, I have wrecked everything for good. the door opens again.

I turn and see Luc stand there, why won't he just leave. This is hard enough as it is without him saying anymore.

'Luc just get out, go back to your house and live a happy life, I hope you find a girl that you and Jack both agrre on. Please just go' I plead with him.

'No Mattie, I won't. I know you didn't mean whta you said' why can't he jjst give up.

'Was it not clear enough for you. I don't amd mever have loved you. Now get out!' I raise my voice.

is eyes fill agin with rejection and hurt.

'Mattie, stop it. You don't mean that. I never meant what I said about Jack being right. I know you love me Mattie and I love you. I don'care about what Jack thinks. I told him that before I came here. If he can't accept you then he has to stay out of my way until he can. I won't let him ruin everything. Mattie you are everything to me. Please forget about Jack, forget about everything, it can be just me adn you that is all that matters' I can tell he means every word. I want to agree with him but I can't.

'No Luc. Ok I do love you so mcuh, but we can't be together. He is your brother and you have already lost your mum. You need your dad and your brother. They are the only family you have. You can find a new girlfrind someone prettier and cleverer than me, someone that Jack approves of. I would never forgivemyslef if you fell out with your brother because of me. He is never going to accept me, so why cause more heartache further down the line. It is easier to do it now. I will always love you but we can't Luc, you need your brother. So please just forget about me, move on and rebuild your relationship with your brother. It is the best thing you can do' I don't want him to, but it is what he has to do.

'No! I won't. Mattie I love you. My brotehr will come roudn eventually. My dad is talking to him and will make him see sense. I know that I am not leaving this house until you take me back. So it is upto you Mattie. We will sit down and talk to Jack right tonight, once we have sorted you and me out if you want to but I am not doing it without you. So you can eitehr take me back or have me live in your bedroom until you give in' He just isn't giving up.

'No Luc, we can't you should talk to your brother not me. You don't need me in your life.'

'I do need you . I love you, if I speak to Jack then it will be with you by my side'

'No!We can't Luc' I wannt to but it will just end up worse than it is now.

'Fine!' he sits infornt of the closed door.

'You asked for this to happen Mattie, I'm not moving until you agree to go back out with me' he sots there.

I can't do it to him. He needs his brother more than he will ever need me.

Ten minutes later...

'Luc please just get up and go' he is so stubborn, he stil won't move.

'Im not moving until you agree to take me back, this is your choice Mattie' I really want to but what if it hurts him even more. He looks at me and can tell I am close to relenting.

'Come on Mattie, I love you and you love me. We will work through it together I promise. I am never going to give up on you Mattie' I don't deserve him.

'Mattie, you are incredible, you are so selfless. You would rather cause yourself pain than make me go through pain. I love you please Mattie, come on you love me just as much' I am crumbling. Maybe I should go back out with him. He did say we could talk to Jack. Oh i'm probably going to regret this but...

'OK Luc' I look down at him and he smiles.

'Really, you will go back out with me again?' he says surprisedly.

'Yeah, but we have to talk to Jack today' I say.

'Of course w will I said we woudln't didn't I. Mattie promise me that you won't do this again, we have to talk about everything ,no matter how much we think it will hrut the other person, please Mattie' I can tell I have really hurt him. I never meant to I just didn't know how else to deal with it.

'OK Luc, I didn't want to hurt you,I know I have and I'm sorry I didn't know what else to do' I begin to cry again.

'I know, can we just forget about it. We are back together adn that is the most important thing. Now come here' he wipes my tears and holds me tight, I hold onto him for dear life as well not wanting to ever let him go again. He kisses me passionately and I respond. The kiss becomes more intense. He breaks it off and holds me tighter again. He grabs my hadns and leads me to my bed.

'No Luc I'm not ready for anything like tha' i go to get up but he grabs me.

'Hey I never meant anything like that. It's just i can't stand for too long, my stomach starts to hurt. Mattie I said we would talk to each other about evreything. I wouldn't just expect anything like that. I am not ready either' I feel so stupid now. It's just when a boy leads you to your bed it tends to mean only one thing, but Luc isn't like any other guy.

'Sorry Luc, I just thought...I'm sorry' i tell him.

'Hey its ok, now come on lets get comfy' he lies back on my bed, resting on my pillows. I don't know what to do or where to go. I don't want to hurt him.

'Come here then baby' he is so sweet. I climb up next to him and cuddle into him, he puts both arms around me and kisses my head.

'I wish we could stay like this forever Luc' I say to him, it felt so right, so perfect.

'I know and maybe soon we will be able to. We have got 16 weeks off together everyday. We won't miss each other too much' I spose he is right.

'I miis you at night Luc, I wish we could hold each other adn fall asleep in each others arms. My double bed is so lonely at night' I say truthfully about how I feel.

'Me too Mattie, I miss you aswell. I hate to ruin this Mattie but can we go and talk to Jack now?' he asks shyly.

'Ok come on then, we are in thsi togetehr Luc. I am really sorry and won't ever do anything like that again. I love you' I tell him trying to reassure him.

'I love you too Mattie. Now come on lets get it over with' I spose it could go well....

[xchazx]

Chapter 9

Talking to Jack...

Luc's P.O.V.

I really hope dad has talked to Jack and made him see sense. I lead Mattie into my house. I notice that Martha is here now.

'Jack can we talk to you please' I ask him calmly.

'Errrrm ok, but first I just want to apologise to Mattie, I am sorry I don't know what came over me' Maybe he has finally seen sense.

'It's ok, can we just leave it in the past now' Mattie says, she is so forgiving. I on the otehr hand still have my doubts.

'So can we talk now JAck' I say again.

We sit and talk for about an hour. He seems to have accepted her.

'I'm just going to the garage to get something' dad says.

'I'm going to the loo, then dad. Mattie do you want to grab DVD from my room, Jack will show you where they are. Won't you Jack' I say to her adn him.

'Yeah sure follow me' he tells her.

Mattie's P.O.V

I'm so gald this thing with Jack is sorted.

'Thankyou Jack. It means a lot to Luc' I say honestly.

'Shut up, you stupid cow. I will be nice when Luc is around but not any other time' he grabs me and oushes me against the waal.

'I am going to spilt you and Luc up and make sure he knows what you are really like. You will never be good enough for him and soon enough he will find someone better who is intelligent and beautiful, everything that you're not.' he whispers to me nastily.

'Jack get off of her, leave her alone' Martha grabs him and he releases me.

'You even think about telling Lucas and I will make you wish you hadn't' he says angrily to me.

The top of my arms are sore now, he grabbed them really hard.

We walk out and Luc notices instantly that something is up.

'Well me & Mattie are going to watch a movie in my room. See you guys in a bit' he grabs my hand and leads me to his room.

'Mattie what is it? Come on what is th matter' He inquires. Should I tell him. I have to, no more lies he said, even if you new it would hurt the other person he said.

'Well Luc, Jack threatened me. We went to your room and I just said thankyou adn then he started saying things. He said that he would split us up and make sure you new what I was really like. He won't will he Luc.' I ask waiting for reassurance.

'Are you sure Mattie, he said he was ok, you know you were there.' he doesn't believe me.

'So you don't believe me thanks Luc! I new this wouldn't work. What happened to what you said only a couple of hours ago. Why would I make it up. You know what. I hope you and your brother are happy together' I get up and storm out.

'No Mattie Wait!!'he shouts, I'm done listening to him.

Martha grabs me. 'Come here' she pulls me in and holds me tight.

'What is the matter?'she whispers.

'I told Luc about what happened and he didn't believe me' I whisper back. Jack looks at us and signals for Martha to get off but she doesn't.

'Mattie I'm sorry,I didn't know what to think' Luc shouts.

'Save it Luc' I snap.

'Well Jack, you got what you wanted. He doesn't believe me. So now you can find that girl who is intelligent and beautiful, like you said everythig that I am not' He smiles Luc catches his smile.

'Did you do it Jack? Tell me the truth' Luc shouts at him.

'Luc, why would I. I told you I accept Mattie. Come on who are you going to believe it sher word against mine' Luc looks at JAck and then at me.

'Luc it's ok. We are over, so you don't even have to choose. Why would I lie though Luc. I love you and you said you loved me. The only reason I told you was because yousaid that we had to tell each other everything even when we new it might hurt them. Thanks Martha, at least you were there for me.' I go to leave, wait Mattie.

'Luc, Mattie is telling the truth, Jack did threaten her. You should have believed her, Jack is an arsehole' Martha finally says.

'What!' Luc shouts.

'I got him to let go of Mattie's arms. When I went in he had up against the wall and was whispering stuff to her' oh no, she didn't have to mention that bit.

'Martha, what are you doing?' Jack asks in disbelief.

'I am standing up fo what is right thats what. You were out of order Jack. I hope Luc doesn't frgive you. You don't deserve it' Jack looks like he is going to errupt with anger.

'Mattie is that true, he grabbed you?' Luc asks me sorryfully.

'What does that matter, you didn't believe me Luc. I told you the truth like YOU said we shoudl and you didn't believe me. Thankyou Martha but you didn't have to' I am about to leave Luc grabs the top of my arm.I wince in pain.

'Mattie' Luc grabs me and rolls up my sleve. My arms all bruised, with outlines of jack's fingers on it.

'Mattie I am so sorry. I did believe you , I just didn't want to believe it. Jack you are an absoloute ****** and I hate you!As far as I am concerned I don't have a brother' Luc shouts at him.

Tony walks in, 'What the hell is going on here now' he shouts.

'Well Jack threatened Mattie and then he grabbed her , look at her ars. Jack did that' Luc errupts.

'Jack get out of this house and don't come back unil you have sorted yourself out. For the first time in my life I ashamed to call you my son. Now get out!' Tony fierecly orders. oh no i have cause more problems.

Marha goes with Jack.

'Matilda, I am so sorry' Tony hugs me.

'Now I am going to do some errr stuff and leave you to alone' Tony says and walks out the back door.

'Mattie can we go to my room, it is more private' I nod cautiously. we go in and he starts.

'Mattie I am so sorry, I just didn't think that JAck was like that. He promised that he was ok' he pleads.

'Luc, this isn't going to work is it. Your familyis being torn apart because of me'

'It is not your fault, its Jack's. I will never doubt you again. I promise. Please Mattie. I can't live without you' he starts to cry. He really means it I can tell but can I risk it.

'I dunno Luc, is it really worth losing your brother?' I ask.

'Yes you are. YOu are worth everything to me. I don't have a brother!' maybe if we stay together I can help sort him and Jack out.

'OK Luc, but this is it. It's not fair on eitehr of us. We have to trust and have faith in each other 100 percent' he stops crying and holds me.

We lie on Luc's bed and snuggle up.

The next morning...

Luc's P.O.V.

I wake up and notice that Mattie is in my arms. It feels so good.She looks so angelic. What about her mum? What about my dad?

The door knocks and dad comes in.

'Are you both ok?' does he know she slept the night.

'Yeah, did you knwo she was in here?' I ask.

'Yeah Luc I came in last night and you were both sound asleep, so I rang Beth and she said to leave you. So I did' omg I spent the night with Mattie, she was the last thing and the first thing tha I have seen.

'Ill leave you to it' dad says and closes the door on his way out.

I wake MAttie.

'Mattie baby wake up. She slowly comatoses and realises where she is.

'Luc I have to get home, mum will go mad' she starts to panic its kind of cute.

'Calm down, your mum knows where you are, my dad rang her and it was her idea to leave us alseep' she relaxes and smiles.

'Well, we got what we wanted Luc, we finally spent the night together, now come here' she turns round and slips on op of me. She kisses me and I feel fantastic. We carry on like that for ages...

[sazcaz89]

love the update! Jack is such ****** idiot. luc and mattie are so cute together.

update soon

[heidikri]

Great chapters, they are still together

[xchazx]

Chapter 10

2 Months later (half way through their 16 week break) Mattie & Luc have been togetehr for almost 3 months. Luc still isn't talking to JAck, Mattie is trying to convince him. Will Luc listen? They also both want to sleep together but neither is willing to admit it. Luc doesn't want to put any pressure on Mattie and she doesn't want to be branded a slag and she is worried that Luc is going to shag her and leave her.MAttie has a free house for two weeks. There is only her and Kit but Kit is oiut getting drunk most nights. It's Friday night.

Mattie's P.O.V.

Luc has justa rrived at mine. We are sitting on my bed. I have to bring up Jack, Luc has to see sense and talk to his brother, I also want to bring up moving our relationship further but what if once we have made love, he decides to dump?what if he doesn't want me like that? oh I don't know. First I have to raise the issue of Jack, then I'll see how things go. He catches my gaze.

'Hey baby, what are you thinking about?' he asks me with concern.

'Well Luc, do you think its about time that you and Jack started talking again? I know that he was out of order but he is still your brother. You won't get anotehr one. Luc no-one is going to split us up, we have been dating for a while now and we love each don't we ?' I say to him.

'Mattie, of course I love you. Jack was more than out of order Mattie. He doesn't deserve anything less than the way he is being treated. He treated you disgracefully and unless he can accept you then he does not belong in my life! No-one is going to split us up, but you do not deserve to be treated the way he treated you. He is on holiday remember, I might talk to him when he gets back. I want he to apologise to you, treate you properly and apologoise to me. If he does that then we will see ok?' that was alot easier than I thought it would be.

'Thankyou Luc. I new there was a reason why I loved you so much' I grin at him cheekily.

I kiss him and he responds we lie back and the kiss intensifies I pullaway, I have to tell him, the way he made me feel, I know I am ready.

'Luc I want to take our relationship further...' i blurt out.

'Mattie errm' Oh no, I new he wouldn't want me. My eyes fill with tears. I get up and walk out.

'Mattie, wait!!!' he shouts. I run into my bathroom and lock the door.

'Mattie I'm sorry' he tells me as I begin to cry.

'Luc, just go away.I'm sorry i thought you wanted me like that' I tell him truthfully.

'I do!God why wouldn't I you are beautiful and smart and funny and I love you. I just didn't want to puit any pressue on you, not if you weren't ready. You could have just talked to me about it properly Mattie' I can tell he means what he says. I unlock the door and walk out.

'Hold me Luc please' he grabs me and holds me tightly, I cling to him for dear life, never wanting to let go, but he pulls back.

'How about we go and sit in the lounge and talk?' he suggests.

'Ok' I reply.

We walk and sit on the sofa.

'Well baby, you can start' he tells me, how kind of him.

'Well Luc, I think I am ready to give myself totally to you, but I am just scared that you will shag me and then dump me' I look him in the eyes and I can see the hurt.

'Mattie, I thought you new me by now. I could and would never do that to you. I love you so much I can't hurt you, why would you think that?' he asks me and I instantly feel guilty.

'I don't know Luc. I know you love me adn I love you but I've seen it happen before. My sister and her boyfriend seemed so in love like us and then he shagged her and dumped her straight after. We all thought he was diffferent to all the other blokes, but he turned out not to be.' I tell him honestly.

'I love you so much Luc and I don't want that to happen. I had to pick up the pieces and it was horrible my sister was a wreck, she ahsn't loved or trusted anyone since. I can't take that risk with myself. I don't think you are like that and I love you so much it hurts sometimes but if tehre is the slightest chance you would do that then I can't take the risk' I hope he can understand.

'Look Mattie, I would never do that. That was your sister not you. I am not that guy and I would never, ever, ever do that!! That is digraceful, I can only imagine what that would feel like, Mattie you are my world. If I lost you I would rather die than live on. When I'm not with you, I feel empty like I'm not complete and I can't wait until I see you again. When we are togetehr it is incredible. My heart beats twice as fast, my stomach feels with butterflies adn I feel like I will burst with happiness. You are incredible, you are everything to me' I know he means every word, I feel guilty about even thinking that he could do that but i had to ask. Nothing ever goes right in my life.

'I'm sorry Luc, it's just nothing ever goes right for me, I'm so happy that I just know something is bound to go wrong. It always does, it's like I'm waiting for you to be taken from me. It will happen I know it, I just don't know when. I love you more than anything and if I lost you I don't think I could cope. I want you Luc, every part of you and I want you to have every part of me, if you want me that is' I hope I haven't blown everything.

'first of all Mattie, nothing and no-one are ever going to take me away from you. You are stuck with me!Of course I want you. I have wanted you like that for a while but I didn't want to say anything incase you felt pressured. If you are sure this is what you want then it is what I want aswell' he says to me honestly. I can see in his eyes he means it.

'I am ready Luc, when, where, how?' I sak.

'Well how? I think we both know that one don't we?' he jokes.

'When, well what about tomorrow. Your house as no-one will disturb us and I will tell my dad I am staying at Ric's' I can't believe it, we are really going to do it.

'Errrm...ok. You will stay the night won't you, you won't just you know and then leave me please Luc you have to promise me that afterwards we can sleep in each others arms.' I ask him.

'Hey of course. I am not going to just walk away afterwards I can't, I wouldn't. I will get the condoms' I am quite nervous already.

'Luc I ....I am a errrm....virigin, I thought I should tell you, I haven't actually seen a penis before how do I know what to do? I hope I won't disappoint you' I say embarassed.

'Hey I am aswell, don't worry it will be perfect I promise' he grabs me and holds me tight.

We sit there for ages, just content yet nervous about what tomorrow will bring.

11 pm, Luc has just left. I have to ring Rach, I have to talk to someone about it.

'Hey rach...' I explain to her. She asks me if I am sure, I tell her I am. She tells me that it may hurt and that I must be safe. I thank her and head to bed. My mind filled with Luc and tomorrow night...

[xchazx]

Chapter 11

7-00pm, Saturday night.Luc and Mattie are watching a film. Luc has got candles and rose petals in his bag, he wants everything to be perfect but he needs time to set it up. Mattie is nervous but knows that it is what she wants...

Luc's P.O.V

I am really nervous. I know as the guy in the relationship I should be at ease with sex, but i am not. I want her but I don't want to disappoint her, what if she thinks I am small or what if I don't satisfy her? I also need to set the room up.

'Mattie can I go and get changed into my PJ's. My bag is in your room isn't it?' I don't usually lie, it wasn't a total lie though.

'Yeah sure, your bag is next to the bed I think' I kiiss her and go to her room.

15 minutes later. The room is finally set up. I had to stop Mattie form coming in.

It looks perfect. A trail of rose petals leading to the bed, candles all around the room. I hope she likes it. I just want everything to be perfect.

I get changed into shorts and a vest. I walk out and she is waiting on the sofa for me. She has changed and is no win her dressing gown.

I'm so nervous...

Mattie's P.O.V.

Luc walks back in. I want him I do I am just so scared.

He sits next to me and I cuddle him.

'Mattie are you ready?' this is it.

'Yeah' I stand and he leads me to our room, it has to be known as our room now.

'Mattie I want everything to be perfect' he opens the dorr and it it is beautiful.

'Oh Luc' I gush.

He kisses me passionately. The kiss intensifies. I take off his top and he releases my rope on my dressing gown. He reveals my lacey, underwear.

We remove all our clothing piece by piece. We are now fully naked infornt of each other for the first time. He looks amazing, even better than I had imagined. I push him onto the bed and he falls and pulls me with him.

"Hang on Mattie, I just need to you know' I do know indeed, we have to be safe. He puts it on and starts to kiss me all over. My spine tingles. He makes me feel fantastic. I love him so much. I roll him over and kiss his body. he pulls me up and rolls on top of me, he kisses me.

'Mattie are you sure about this?' I now know that I really am.

'Yeah Luc, I love you' he smiles.

'I love you to' I kiss him and he guides himself into me.

It hurts but after a while the pain subsides and I start to releax and enjoy the sensations he is giving me...

Luc's P.O.V.

This is incredible. She is incredible. I am making love to the most beautiful girl in the world. I love her so much.

2 hours later...

She is moaning quite loud now. I feel like I am about to cum. She holds onto me for dear life and I feel it release. That was incredible. The best experiance of my life. I hope she is ok. I need to go to the bathroom and get rid of the used condom. I don't want to leave her though. I pull out of her and go to get up.

'Luc, you said you wouldn't leave. You promised!' she says hurt.

'I know but i have to go to the bathroom, one obvious reason why. I will be back before you know it' I say and point. She smiles and relaxes. I go to get up but she pull me back down and kisses me intensely.

'Now you can go' she smiles and lies back.

5 minutes later.

'Mattie I'm back' I say happily.

'Good, I missed you Luc I love you so much' well she doesn't seem disappointed so that is good.

'I love you to but i have to go' I say jokingly.I look at her face, she looks hurt.

'But you said...' I cut her off.

'I'm joking baby calm down. I can't leave you can I ?' she doesn't seem to amused by my joke. She turns her back on me. i grab her and turn her back around.

'I was joking, I love you. Mattie was it ... ok for you? I didn't hurt you or do anything wrong did I?' she smiles.

'Luc it was amazing, I have never experianced anything like that feeling. You were incredible. It was incredible. Luc it was the best experiance of my life' I am so glad.

I kiss her and pull her close.

'I think we should get some sleep, don't you lover boy?' she says.

We dose off happy, content and in each others arms. This has been the best night of my life.

Chapter 12

The morning after their night together.

Mattie's P.O.V.

I have just woken up. I turn to cuddle Luc and he isn't there. I sit up and shout him.

'Luc, Luc are you still here?' I hope he hasn't left. He promised he wouldn't.

He walks in with a cooked breakfast on a tray. It even has a rose on it.

'Hey baby, I thought we could have breakfast in bed' he smiles.

'Now that sounds good' I reply cheekily.

35 minutes later...

'Mattie baby, do you think we should get out of bed now? It is almost 10-30?' He asks, he gets up early, whereas me I like to sleep.

'Do we have to? Can't I just lay in your arms for a little longer? Pretty please?' I ask in my sweetest voice.

'Well I suppose we could.Who am I to refuse the girl that I love what she wants?' I wish it could be like this forever.

an hour later...

We have both had a shower and got dressed. We are sitting cuddled up on the sofa.

'Mattie I think I should nip home. I can drop my stuff off and tell my dad that I'm spending the day with you' I don't want him to leave, but i suppos he has to go home sometime.

'Ok Luc, but be quick' I tell him. He smiles.

'I'll be back in a flash' he says and with that leaves.

An hour has past and he still hasn't come back. Where the hell ahs he got to?

My phone buzzez its from Luc ...'Hey baby, do u want 2 cum 2 myn i av a surprize 4 ya?sorry ive bn so long had to organise it. im in my room and i will b w8in 4 ya. plz hurry lv ya so much xx' ooo I like surprises.

I walk into Luc's and knock on his bedroom door. There is a note. It tells me to go into the garden and into the garage.

I walk in and see Luc has made the garage look cosy and romantic. He ahs even made a picnic. I see the inflateable double bed. I look at him and he smiles.

'So Luc, you ready for round two are you?' I say cheekily.

I lean down to kiss him and he pulls me on top of him. he wriggles us onto the bed. he even has a duvet and pillows.We begin to kiss and it unfolds from there...

two hours later...

I am lying in luc's arms. The realisation has started to kick in, it is an immense feeling, the best in the world. To make love with the love of your life.

'Luc, what happens tonight.I don't want to be apart from you. I want to fall asleep in your arms. I don't ever want to be without you' I tell him frankly.

'I don't know.We both need some sleep Mattie, maybe we should just stay in uor own beds? I will only be next door' he says.

'I didn't meean like that Luc. I just want you there with me. We don't have to have sex just because we will be in the same bed you know. It is not all about sex. I just want to know that you still want me, even when we aren't making love Luc' he seems like all he wants is sex. maybe we shoudln't have.

'Hey, I didn't mean it like that. Of course i still want you. I love you. I loved you beofre we started making love and I love afterwards aswell. I want to fall asleep with you but how can we?' thank god! I thought for one horrible moment there that he didn't want me.

'I don't know.We can figure something out can't we.....

[sazcaz89]

Love the updates!!

update soon

[shortie_689]

This is a GREAT story, I have loved every chapter so far and I am integued by the uncertainty that both Luc and Matilda have it is really well written and I think a lot of teens would really relate to it!!!

Keep up the great work and I can't wait for your next chapter!!!

[xchazx]

This is a GREAT story, I have loved every chapter so far and I am integued by the uncertainty that both Luc and Matilda have it is really well written and I think a lot of teens would really relate to it!!!

Keep up the great work and I can't wait for your next chapter!!!

Thanks. Very nice comment.I don't think it is very good but it is nive to no that someone does . Well I am trying to do a chapter every night but it is quite difficult as I am doing my exams at the moment, so the next chapter will be up as soon as possible.

[tasha7905]

Just caught up and it is a great story. I like how you write their insecurities, its very believeable. Hope there is more soon.