Love Problems

[Symphony]

There was this guy msn'd me tonight. I've dated / seen a few guys in my lifetime. Out of that [small] handful, there were two that I knew I could have fallen deeply, in love with even - if the timing had been right. He was one of the two; and hearing from him now, tonight, for the first time in over a year - and its brought back so many happy memories for me! not that we'll ever get back together; our time together is gone now, I know that - but .. oh it just made me smile a lot tonight

[Symphony]

I feel like I should make this thread my second home!

Anyway, today's grumble is about my boyfriend, yes the one I broke up with and was so happy to be finally back with and everything is going heaps better and we're more in love than ever bla bla bla.

The thing is, we were broken up for a bit over a month and I just found out that he got with (I'm assuming slept with) someone else in that time. I know we were broken up and I was the one that initiated it so I can't be upset with him about it and I'm trying my best to be cool about it but man it hurts! I was so depressed in that month I couldn't think about anyone else. And I know it's different for guys but still

And that's not really the problem. The problem is that I didn't find out from him. I found out from a mutual friend that just let it slip. So now I don't know whether or not to confront him about. I know that in that month what he did was none of my business and he hasn't outright lied to me. But I can't help but feel betrayed. Is this me just being hysterical? I'm not sure. Anyway, anybody got any advice? Do I talk to him or let it go?

My advice isn't what you want to hear; because I'd advise you to try and let it go [even though I *know* it seems like the hardest thing in the world]

You're not being hysterical; we're all only human, and the thought of anyone else sleeping with your man, even if you guys were taking a time out at the time, is so hard to come to terms with - you want to cry and scream and rant and rave and hit someone/something all at once.

But at the same time, he was technically a free man; also, note you're assuming - they couldd've just meant a kiss; do you know the situation it was? ie at a party, was he drunk etc.

If he chose not to tell you, perhaps he was trying to save from hurting you - or, perhaps, assumed that he needn't as you guys were broken up then.

So to me, I think bringing it up will only cause more upset, he'll know he sees it in your eyes when he looks at you - might cause rows, etc....

*hug* but its not easy, i know that.

[rachel&kim]

I feel like I should make this thread my second home!

Anyway, today's grumble is about my boyfriend, yes the one I broke up with and was so happy to be finally back with and everything is going heaps better and we're more in love than ever bla bla bla.

The thing is, we were broken up for a bit over a month and I just found out that he got with (I'm assuming slept with) someone else in that time. I know we were broken up and I was the one that initiated it so I can't be upset with him about it and I'm trying my best to be cool about it but man it hurts! I was so depressed in that month I couldn't think about anyone else. And I know it's different for guys but still

And that's not really the problem. The problem is that I didn't find out from him. I found out from a mutual friend that just let it slip. So now I don't know whether or not to confront him about. I know that in that month what he did was none of my business and he hasn't outright lied to me. But I can't help but feel betrayed. Is this me just being hysterical? I'm not sure. Anyway, anybody got any advice? Do I talk to him or let it go?

My advice isn't what you want to hear; because I'd advise you to try and let it go [even though I *know* it seems like the hardest thing in the world]

You're not being hysterical; we're all only human, and the thought of anyone else sleeping with your man, even if you guys were taking a time out at the time, is so hard to come to terms with - you want to cry and scream and rant and rave and hit someone/something all at once.

But at the same time, he was technically a free man; also, note you're assuming - they couldd've just meant a kiss; do you know the situation it was? ie at a party, was he drunk etc.

If he chose not to tell you, perhaps he was trying to save from hurting you - or, perhaps, assumed that he needn't as you guys were broken up then.

So to me, I think bringing it up will only cause more upset, he'll know he sees it in your eyes when he looks at you - might cause rows, etc....

*hug* but its not easy, i know that.

Yeah it was a girl that he had a brief thing with way back, before we got together. So the fact that they've got history, however brief, is getting to me as well. Does he have feelings for her? I'd be much better about it if was just some random at a bar. But it wasn't, he wasn't even drunk as far as I know. And he stayed over with her so I guess they probably slept together.

But it's driving me crazy not knowing! And I just want to get it out in the open and talk to him. I think he knows something's up and I'm trying not to let on I'm preoccupied about something but it's so damn hard! Anyway, what you're saying makes sense. I know I should try and let it go, I guess it's just going to take time. Thanks for the advice though.

And what about your man? Is there definately no chance for a reconciliation? It's so nice when you hear from someone in your past you haven't seen for ages. Like a little happy reminder!

[rising-flame]

Just want to say thanks to everyone who gave me advice. The guy i met through work stuff i've now been dating for three weeks. No idea how long things will last, but at the moment i'm happy.

[Symphony]

I feel like I should make this thread my second home!

Anyway, today's grumble is about my boyfriend, yes the one I broke up with and was so happy to be finally back with and everything is going heaps better and we're more in love than ever bla bla bla.

The thing is, we were broken up for a bit over a month and I just found out that he got with (I'm assuming slept with) someone else in that time. I know we were broken up and I was the one that initiated it so I can't be upset with him about it and I'm trying my best to be cool about it but man it hurts! I was so depressed in that month I couldn't think about anyone else. And I know it's different for guys but still

And that's not really the problem. The problem is that I didn't find out from him. I found out from a mutual friend that just let it slip. So now I don't know whether or not to confront him about. I know that in that month what he did was none of my business and he hasn't outright lied to me. But I can't help but feel betrayed. Is this me just being hysterical? I'm not sure. Anyway, anybody got any advice? Do I talk to him or let it go?

My advice isn't what you want to hear; because I'd advise you to try and let it go [even though I *know* it seems like the hardest thing in the world]

You're not being hysterical; we're all only human, and the thought of anyone else sleeping with your man, even if you guys were taking a time out at the time, is so hard to come to terms with - you want to cry and scream and rant and rave and hit someone/something all at once.

But at the same time, he was technically a free man; also, note you're assuming - they couldd've just meant a kiss; do you know the situation it was? ie at a party, was he drunk etc.

If he chose not to tell you, perhaps he was trying to save from hurting you - or, perhaps, assumed that he needn't as you guys were broken up then.

So to me, I think bringing it up will only cause more upset, he'll know he sees it in your eyes when he looks at you - might cause rows, etc....

*hug* but its not easy, i know that.

Yeah it was a girl that he had a brief thing with way back, before we got together. So the fact that they've got history, however brief, is getting to me as well. Does he have feelings for her? I'd be much better about it if was just some random at a bar. But it wasn't, he wasn't even drunk as far as I know. And he stayed over with her so I guess they probably slept together.

But it's driving me crazy not knowing! And I just want to get it out in the open and talk to him. I think he knows something's up and I'm trying not to let on I'm preoccupied about something but it's so damn hard! Anyway, what you're saying makes sense. I know I should try and let it go, I guess it's just going to take time. Thanks for the advice though.

And what about your man? Is there definately no chance for a reconciliation? It's so nice when you hear from someone in your past you haven't seen for ages. Like a little happy reminder!

I know; things like that are hard. I guess, well if it comes up - you could say it but not in a defensive "im mad at you for not telling me way" but more a non-challenging "i'm hurt you didn't tell me" way? might lessen the chance of a loss of temper [hug] good luck with it though, it can't be easy.

As for me & that dude; nope - too much time has passed. i'd probably still feel heartbeat quicken etc if I saw him [or heard his GORGEOUSLY sexy voice - accent!!] but, I haven't seen him in three years or so - I reckon we've both changed a lot since then

[jack+martha=trooluvv]

For now, I'm just sticking with friends/a little bit of fun flirting. Keeps us both happy, and neither of us is ready for a full relationship.

[-Kevin-]

I have been chatting to this guy on msn for about a week and met up with him tonight.We had some fun in the backseat of his car but says that he is not gay.I was just thinking to myself "if this guy isnt gay well then why is he kissing me and touching me".I would actually like to meet up with him again,but he says he is not gay so I wouldnt say he will.

What do you guys think ??

[MissOlivia22]

Arggg! I've been going out with this boy on and off for a while. Outside of school he was lovely and kind and loving. But in school he acted like a complete and utter twat to impress his friends, it pissed me off but whenever anyone else was around, he was different. I broke it off with him, but know he keeps flirting with me via text and msn, but denying it and treating me like dirt when we get back to school. He keeps asking me out and it's pissing me off....

[~Lynd~]

Far freaking out.I haven't seen him for 2 or 3 months and i still can't get him out of my mind.My head seriously needs examining!

[matticus01]

Well this is the place for me then

I was dating this guy I'd known for nearly two years now, for almost 8 months. And...(you guys have heard of the show, carnival, fair) well I do that and will be once again travelling with them.

Well I was so happy to see my bf because I hadn't seen him for so long, anyway, at the moment the Tasmanian shows are happening down here and for the first show, my guy, turned up to the Burnie show holding some other chicks hand and being all lovey dovey.

It broke my heart, and now I'll have to see him again when I go back over, any advice?

he promised me he wouldn't hurt me...... talk about a joke!