Inactive User Posted March 20, 2009 Report Posted March 20, 2009 Great two chapters. I am enjoying this fanfiction Update soon Well you should know I will be away tomorrow to a family reunion for the weekend so I will not be on here to coment on the next update. I will back on Sunday sometime whatever time we will be home. So I don't have to take my laptop with me, lol. Quote
Red Ranger 1 Posted March 20, 2009 Report Posted March 20, 2009 you never fail to disappoint us RR1 - looking forward to the next installment In case any Adelle fans are disappointed that I split them up again...sorry.Genuinely.I know it's no fun reading about your favourite couple splitting up.I wasn't even planning on doing it when I first had this idea but as it went on I realised I needed to.Given that this is the third, possibly fourth, fiction in which I've done it, I'm worried it's becoming a compulsion. Quote
Jody Posted March 20, 2009 Report Posted March 20, 2009 “Actually,”Aden replied,“Belle’s the one person I’ve always been able to be myself with.I’m just not sure it’s ever been the same for her.I always expect her to be this perfect girlfriend who’ll take whatever I throw at her.And she always does.I upset her today.Over something that wasn’t even important, that wasn’t even really about us.And I know that if I go round there and apologise, she’ll forgive me.” I liked this because it made the scene between them in the last chapter seem less ridiculous, I found that scene between them to be quite laughable. For Aden to question her respect for him or even be bothered in the slightest by Belle not filling him in on the fact that Geoff was spending an evening with a friend is pretty unrealistic. This chapter helped that. Aden's 'over something that wasn't even important' comment made it like his reaction wasn't about caring about the Tam/Geoff situation but rather his own one with Belle. I liked his thoughts on their relationship. It's very true. It's good that Aden seems to realise how he behaves when it comes to their relationship. I hope this realisation of his leads somewhere. Hopefully Belle won't apologise and if she does then he snaps at her and lets all this out, I could see this happening. I'm sure he'd rather have a fiesty girlfriend who keeps him on his toes rather then one who acts like shes helpless around him. The Geoff/Mel scene, in the last chapter, was good. I loved how she seemed more annoyed then anything at him blaming her. Looks like his opinion doesn't mean much to her anymore. Love that. The Aden/Geoff scene from that chapter was good as well. I enjoyed Rachel and Tam's talk. Rachel made a good point about how Geoff is going to feel about her now after she ruined his relationship. Quote
Red Ranger 1 Posted March 20, 2009 Report Posted March 20, 2009 “Actually,”Aden replied,“Belle’s the one person I’ve always been able to be myself with.I’m just not sure it’s ever been the same for her.I always expect her to be this perfect girlfriend who’ll take whatever I throw at her.And she always does.I upset her today.Over something that wasn’t even important, that wasn’t even really about us.And I know that if I go round there and apologise, she’ll forgive me.” I liked this because it made the scene between them in the last chapter seem less ridiculous, I found that scene between them to be quite laughable. For Aden to question her respect for him or even be bothered in the slightest by Belle not filling him in on the fact that Geoff was spending an evening with a friend is pretty unrealistic. This chapter helped that. Aden's 'over something that wasn't even important' comment made it like his reaction wasn't about caring about the Tam/Geoff situation but rather his own one with Belle. I liked his thoughts on their relationship. It's very true. It's good that Aden seems to realise how he behaves when it comes to their relationship. I hope this realisation of his leads somewhere. Hopefully Belle won't apologise and if she does then he snaps at her and lets all this out, I could see this happening. I'm sure he'd rather have a fiesty girlfriend who keeps him on his toes rather then one who acts like shes helpless around him. Glad you thought that because that was pretty much my thought.I kept thinking about that scene and couldn't get it to work and then I thought of that bit with Aden and Roman and it was like "Ding-that'd work." Quote
Slade Posted March 21, 2009 Report Posted March 21, 2009 (edited) That whole scene with Geoff/Melody/Aden made me smile (especially liked Melody’s remark). Did Aden really do that for Nicole? Initially I thought he just wanted to stir things up for his own amusement or perhaps he was harbouring some jealousy but maybe he just didn’t want that happening to him. I do remember you breaking Adelle up in Life on the Inside but hadn’t realised you’d done it in your other fanfics as well. I’m guessing subconsciously this reflects how you want things to eventuate on the actual show. I liked the dialogue between Rachel and Tam. I could just picture Rachel being like that as well. Not only was Tam unrepentant but actually pleased with how well things proceeded too. Edited March 21, 2009 by Slade Quote
Red Ranger 1 Posted March 21, 2009 Report Posted March 21, 2009 I do remember you breaking Adelle up in Life on the Inside but hadn’t realised you’d done it in your other fanfics as well. I’m guessing subconsciously this reflects how you want things to eventuate on the actual show. Yeah, that was the "possibly".I also did it in Light and Shade and Family Matters.(Ahhh, Light and Shade, the only time I was threatened by a reader...although even then they apologised straightaway.)I really hope it's not become an obsession of mine, this one's my least favourite break-up because it does just seem to have come out of nothing. Quote
Inactive User Posted March 23, 2009 Report Posted March 23, 2009 Great chapter. Loved it Update soon please Quote
Jody Posted March 24, 2009 Report Posted March 24, 2009 (edited) Apart from the Annie bits in the last two chapters I can't say I'm feeling this story much anymore. I liked Annie not reacting very positively to Tam only to realise that she's not the enemy. And then in this chapter sticking up for her. Geoff and Melody's talk was good. Geoff's realising that he doesn't feel exactly the same way he did with Nicole was good as well. I may not like Nic/Geoff but I could see that happening. The rest just left me cold, even Tam which is surprising. As for Aden, he seems to be contradicting himself in the last few chapters when it come to his reaction to the Geoff/Tam/Nic stuff. Also I feel like one minute he is being written like he is now on the show and then a while later he is being written like some watered down version of his old self. The scene in the diner with Geoff definitely the latter. This fic had potential. But I honestly I can't seem to get into it anymore. The last two chapters just didn't do anything for me. It was good while it lasted though. And there was a positive, I managed to get through reading about Geoff/Nic without too much eye rolling. I guess the presence of Tam helped with that but still. Edited March 24, 2009 by Jody Quote
Inactive User Posted March 24, 2009 Report Posted March 24, 2009 Great chapter. Had enjoyed reading it Update soon Quote
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