How Does It Feel

[I love music]

Enjoyed reading, Kristina, will review when I have a lilttle more time.

[I love music]

Great chapter, Kristina, and I one hundred per cent agree wtih Red Ranger 1 - the Kane scenes lifted into a much more dramatic episode. I enjoyed the scene where Kirsty finds the old T-shirt and also the conversation between herself and Ollie. I'm intrigued to know who Kane's new cellmate is - I have two ideas as to who it could be tho (could be completely wrong about both ) but I'll find out next update!

[Slade]

I’ll play copy cat and say great chapter for the third time. Kane hadn’t been in it for a while so as mentioned at least it adds more to the overall plot of the story and gives it direction, although I did really enjoy the stuff with Kirsty and Martha that you wrote previously.

The scene where she smelt his T-shirt was a lovely touch. It was just a reminder that she just wanted anything to be close to him, not to forget him (I know this was different but it actually reminded me a while back where Ric caught Jai smelling Matilda’s clothes because her perfume reminded him of his mother who had passed away).

Lovely scene with Ollie. Very emotional. Firstly when he wanted his daddy and Kirsty said she wanted him too. Then when Ollie asked Kirsty if she was going way and finally when he asked if his dad still loves him.

The scenes with Kane have got me really excited. As I love music said, I thought that there were only two people who it could possibly be - Scott or Jesse. Let’s wait and see.

[I love music]

The scenes with Kane have got me really excited. As I love music said, I thought that there were only two people who it could possibly be - Scott or Jesse. Let’s wait and see.

No, I didn't think of Scott Phillips, I forgot all about him! I only thought of Gus and Jesse.

[Kris10na]

Thank you for your comments

Chapter 11

Kane stood as though he was spiked to the floor. He managed to close his mouth and he wanted to say something. However, there were so many words and he could not sort them into sentences. Only one word made sense alone and he said:

“Jesse?!”

It was Jesse standing in front of him. His old mate Jesse and he could not believe it.

“Kane!?” Jesse said in the same surprising voice.

“So you’re my cell mate?” Kane asked.

“Yep. Well, actually you’re my cell mate as I had this cell all by myself before you came.” He smiled. “Come here,” he said, stepped forward and gave Kane a hug. “You have to tell me how you ended up in here. Did the police catch ya on the run?”

They sat down by the small table in the middle of the room.

“No, they didn’t,” Kane began and told Jesse about how Kirsty, Oliver and him came back to Summer Bay three months earlier.

“Oliver? Your son?” Jesse asked.

Kane nodded.

“We always wondered what happened to you guys and if everything went okay with the baby. We were hoping for something to come. Well, I know Irene did. A letter or a phone call to tell us about the baby, but…” his voice died out.

“No, um, we wanted to call Irene, we did. But we couldn’t stay in the hospital for long after Ollie was born. I had to sneak Kirsty out and drive as far as we could.”

“It must have been terrible for you guys. I mean, watching your back all the time and money. How did you manage to work when you could not use your real names?”

“We had to take jobs where there were no questions asked and where we could get the cash in hand as we could not use our bank accounts. We did a couple of fruit picking jobs, I worked a week here and a week there after Ollie was born. But we didn’t want to stay too long in the same place.”

“I couldn’t have been easy mate. But tell me, what happened when you and Kirsty came back.”

“Well, I pulled a robbery…”

“You did what??”

“I know. It was stupid. I pulled a robbery and Ric recognized me.”

Kane continued his story. Jesse listen carefully, nodding or shaking his head at the right times. Sometimes he asked questions such as “who’s Aden?” and “what did he say then?”

…

It was Saturday morning in the Caravan Park House. Everyone had slept in and by 10 o’clock Kirsty came down for breakfast. Miles and Jai weren’t up yet, only Ollie sitting by himself playing with his cars. His t-shirt was put on back to front.

“Good morning sweetie!” Kirsty said to him.

“Morning Mum! I’m hungry.”

“Okay. I’ll make you breakfast. I just have to put your t-shirt on the right way.”

“I put it on myself Mum. And my pants and I was very quiet because I didn’t want to wake you.”

“That was very thoughtful of you,” Kirsty said while turning Oliver’s t-shirt the right way.

An hour later everyone in the house had had their breakfast and Jai was gone out to see Annie.

Then the door flung open and VJ ran through it. Roman followed right behind.

“I won!” VJ yelled.

“Ah, you beat me,” Roman said, pretending to be disappointed.

“Miles,” VJ said. “We wondered if Ollie would like to come and play soccer with us,” he said as fast as his mouth could move.

There was no doubt in Ollie’s mind when Kirsty asked him, and soon he had left with Roman and VJ. Miles went to clear out some of the vans for new renters and Kirsty went upstairs to look through Ollie’s clothes.

She sat on the bed, looking around in the room. There was the corner where the mirror and make-up table had been and she remembered where her and Jade’s beds had been. As her glance swept across on of the corners of the room, the corner closest to where her old bed had been, she remembered something. Something she had hidden all those years ago and she wondered if it was still there. She quickly got up and hurried to the corner, the curiosity burning inside her. She bent down and kneeled on the floor. Then she tried to lift up a flooring board, and even though she used all her strength, she could not remove it. Had someone fastened it? She tried the board next to it. Slowly but surely she managed to wriggle the board up enough so that she could get her hand underneath and pull out what was under.

She dragged her hand out, in it a piece of paper. She looked at it for a while. It was worn in the edges from being hid and dragged out several times. It was frayed after being read a lot of times and the paper had started to grow yellow after being hidden under the floor for that long. Slowly she folded it out and started reading:

Kirsty,

You probably hate me right now, and I wouldn't blame you. Hate me for kicking you out the car that day, for promising we'd be together and then just running out on you. But I didn't know what else to do.

You deserve heaps more than I can give you. You deserve to have your family around you, and a life to look forward to. It was the hardest thing that I've ever had to do, you have to believe that.

You don't know how much I wish I could pick up the phone and hear your voice, or hold you in my arms. Being with you always made me feel so good, I felt like I could do anything. I now know that I can change my life. I started doing that the day I met you.

And you. You have so much going for you. You can do anything, you just have to go for it Kirst.

Go out there and grab exactly what you want, I know you can do it. I love you Kirsty, I always will and I'll never forget you.

Kane

As she read her eyes became all wet. She managed to get herself into bed, laid down and cried. A few minutes later there was a knock on the door and someone opened it from the outside.

“Kirsty, I found these in the van,” Miles said.

Kirsty sat up, perplexed. She tried to focus her eyes on Miles but it wasn’t easy as they were sore from the crying. She tried to look down so that Miles would not notice that she had cried, but it was too late. What she had been doing was written all over her face in tear-streaked mascara.

“Kirsty! What is wrong?” Miles came towards her.

He sat down beside Kirsty, put his arms around her and she cried into his shoulder. Neither of knew how long they sat there, but Kirsty’s sobs faded away and eventually she was completely calm. She lifted her head up and peered against the low afternoon sun coming in through the window. Her hand brushed her hair away from her cheek and she looked into Miles’ eyes.

“Thank you,” she said shyly.

“Anytime,” he answered. “You know I’m here for you whenever you need me,” he said, not as a question, but as a statement.

Kirsty nodded and looked at him again, thanking him with her eyes. Then she leant her head onto his shoulder again and he let her, putting his arms around her and comforting her. She relaxed and the warmth and the intimacy of the hug made her pleased yet confused and sad. Kirsty slowly sat up again, but Miles would not let her go completely. His arms were still around her, resting on her back and holding her close to him. Kirsty didn’t know what to do, her head was bent down and she didn’t know whether to keep it bent or to look at Miles again. Eventually she lifted her head and when her eyes meet his they were much closer than she had dreaded. Their noses were only millimetres from touching and Kirsty froze. She wanted to run away, but her body wouldn’t move. Kirsty felt Miles’s warm breath on her face; he was still staring into her eyes. Then, all of a sudden the grip weakened and he let her go. They both got up; none of them knew where to look or what to do.

Miles cleared his throat. “I’m going to the shops. Is there anything you need?”

“Um, no. I don’t think so.”

…

When Miles went Oliver came back. His cheeks were red and he was filled with excitement. After feeding him, Kirsty sent him up to play, she needed some time to herself. She made a cup of tea and sat down on the couch. Then there was a knock on the door. ‘Typically’ Kirsty thought and considered not to answer it. But what if it was someone who wanted to rent a van or someone who was paying the rent? She got up and headed toward the door. The person standing on the other side of it was someone Kirsty didn’t expect at all and by the look on his face he hadn’t expected to meet Kirsty either.

[Red Ranger 1]

Jesse!Glad it was him and I think that's a good move, it gives Kane someone to talk to.Kirsty finding the letter was a nice moment.And once again I'm left wondering who that was at the end...

[I love music]

Glad it was Jesse! Nice for Kane to have something good happen to him.

Kane continued his story. Jesse listened carefully, nodding or shaking his head at the right times. Sometimes he asked questions such as “who’s Aden?” and “what did he say then?”

Don't lose interest in writing a scene. If you really can't think what to say, tie the ending up in one or two sentences eg There was a lot to catch up on and Jesse was a willing listener. Kane drew a deep breath and began. The rest of the scene is fine.

Ollie sitting by himself playing with his cars. His t-shirt was put on back to front.

“Good morning sweetie!” Kirsty said to him.

Once again, I really like the Kirsty/Ollie moments, very sweet.

Then she tried to lift up a flooring board, and even though she used all her strength, she could not remove it. Had someone fastened it? She tried the board next to it. Slowly but surely she managed to wriggle the board up enough so that she could get her hand underneath and pull out what was under.

My favourite part of the chapter was where Kirsty finds the letter again, especially as, realistically, it wasn't easy to retrieve. I'd forgotten what he wrote so it was nice to re-read over Kirsty's shoulder.

I was going to say it would have been better to end the chapter on the dramatic note and line Then, all of a sudden the grip weakened and he let her go. but you were miles (I only realised that pun when I previewed this post!!!) ahead of me and had your own dramatic ending all planned out!

Looking forward to finding out who the caller at the door is.

[Slade]

Ok, quite liked the dialogue between Kane Jesse and him being there is definitely a good thing as had it been Scott or Gus (who I hadn’t thought of) they no doubt would have landed him in more trouble. I wondered how he would react after Kane told him about the robbery he committed at the jewellers. I also wonder how long Jesse’s going to wait before telling him about Chloe. I thought it was funny you brought him into the storyline because during the summer in the UK they stopped showing Home and Away for a month and showed some older episodes which had Jesse and Kane in. One of them was the one where he reluctantly sacked him from the Gym and the other two were where when Sarah Lewis shot Jesse at the Surf Club and Kane tried to help him.

Ah the letter. I always wondered what happened to that. I know Shelly searched Kirsty’s room shortly after Kane returned her to the bay but I don't believe there was any mention of it (even though Kirsty kept the ring he gave her). I actually think the letter had just as much sentimental value. Looks like she and Miles had a moment which is kind of understandable as she’s lonely. Good description BTW.

So we end the chapter with mystery person number two. I won’t even try and guess who it is this time.