If You Don't Wanna Love Me (by charmed60) - comments

[suzannelgnz]

That was a great chapter Laura, That confrontation between Rach and Kate was really well written and I'm glad that Rach was able to vent her anger like that.

I'm looking forward to reading about what Tony has to say to Kate about how she's treating Rach & Harry + the whole Leah & Rach part involving what i'm assuming is Rach beginning to lose her hair.

[Danni02]

Loved that chapter Laura.

Cant believe Kate was calling Harry Jack! And saying she was his mummy....and then what she was saying to Rachel...really dont like this woman, but I guess we are not suppose to....

Loved the confrontation between Kate and Rachel.

Like the sound of the preview, well Tony confronting Kate anyways! The Leah/Rachel stuff will be sad Poor Rachel.

[TachelHolden]

I can't believe Kate how insensitive she really is. Run Tony run!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Tachel Theyre still in loveee and little Harry i soo cant wait for Tony to find out

[crazylazy]

ive caught up finally - this isan amazing fic,your storey is fantastic,i love the friendships and your setting the scene is brill

i really cant wait for the next update

many thanks x

[suzannelgnz]

Laura- That last update was beautiful, I especially loved how you had Martha and Leah helping Rach get through starting to lose her hair.

Can't wait to see how Tony reacts to Rach's illness.

xx

[TachelHolden]

Was sooo good :-o rachels hair!!!!! come on Tony can't wait for him to find out xx update soon

[KirstyEkua]

Ohh Laura those two chapters were so emotional!!

I can't believe Kate was holding Harry like that, calling him Jack and saying she was his mum. That must have broke Rachel's heart to hear that, especially as she has no real control over Kate spending time with Harry. I did love how Harry calmed down as soon as Rachel held him though!! Kate is really losing it, it's like she knows she's barely holding on to Tony and she's doing everything possible to keep him. I love Tony defending Rachel and getting really angry at Kate for what she did, it's so clear how much he wants to be with her But i am glad Tony and Kate didn't get to take Harry away - 2 weeks is such a long time and although Rach is going to be in hospital for most of that, at least she can have Harry visit. I think she needs him to help her through this.

I loved how you did the scene of her hair falling out. Again i think it's lovely she has Leah there supporting her unconditionally and having Martha bring her headscarfs round was bittersweet. It was lovely they were able to laugh about it and fool around a bit, maybe having fun with it is the best way to deal with it.

“No I’m serious” Leah assured. “It looks really trendy, I’m actually quite jealous I think I’m gonna steal one of these.” Rachel laughed as Leah grabbed one and attempted to wrap it around her head, tying herself in knots.

Awww. That was just so sweet and exactly like something Leah would do i think.

Can't wait to find out what happens next!!

[flyingwithoutwings]

Ah, just caught up on the last few chapters: WOW!

So much has happened, it's amazing.

Kate =

How dare she hold Harry like that, calling him Jack, and acting like she was his Mum... she has a few issues, me thinks. I loved Tony defending Rach, even though I'm still not happy with him. I loved how Harry calmed down as soon as Rach held him... aww.

Now, onto the most recent chapter...

My goodness, that was absolutely beautiful. You wrote it so well, so sensitively, it was amazing. I loved how Leah was so supportive, and the way she brought Martha in was a lovely touch. It made me like Martha a lot, too! I loved their fooling around, cheering Rach up... it was so beautiful. And such a realistic portrayal of friendship, but also Rach's hard times. It was just... beautiful.

This was just one of the MANY things that stood out to me in the last few chapters...

Rachel carefully stepped down the stairs into her garden, clinging tightly to the basket of wet clothes she had thrust onto her hip. She knew that Leah would slap her wrists if she knew she was trekking across the garden to hang her washing out instead of just putting it in the tumble dryer; but she desperately needed something to take her mind off of the day she had ahead of her. Derek had called only a week after she’d had the bone marrow test and it had confirmed what they had feared; she had acute myeloid leukaemia. She hated the way they said it, as if she was no longer a person but a statistic instead; a guinea pig that they could now trial loads of untested but potentially cancer destroying treatments. They’d wanted to start the chemotherapy straight away which had most upsettingly to Rachel, left her with no choice but to let Tony take Harry with him to see Lucas. He’d arrived earlier and gushed about how grateful he was that she’d let Harry go and how it wasn’t a personal thing but something very important to Kate. She’d resisted against her immediate instinct which was to tell him that she couldn’t care less about his new girlfriend’s needs and instead smiled sweetly; saving her tears for when he’d closed the door. She knew she should think of it as a blessing; they estimated she’d need to stay in hospital for a couple of weeks and that was how long Tony was going to be down with Lucas for so it had actually worked out perfectly. But the thought of not seeing Harry for two weeks was literally breaking her heart and she had no idea how she was going to get through it. Hearing him giggle and seeing him smile every day constantly reminded her that couldn’t give into this disease which was plaguing her body and a tear slid down her cheek as she realised that all she had for the next two weeks were photographs and memories of him. She shook her head as if to symbolically remove the terrifying thoughts which were poisoning her consciousness. Memories and photographs might not be the same but she knew it would be enough to keep her fighting. She paused and rested her arms on the table close to the washing line, allowing herself time to catch her breath whilst she ran through in her head the list of things she’d need to take into hospital with her. Feeling satisfied that she’d remembered everything, Rachel began removing the wet clothes from the basket and hung them on the line, grabbing onto it as waves of dizziness passed over her whenever she looked up. She smiled sadly as she picked up from the pile one of Harry’s tiny pale blue baby grows he’d worn when he was first born. She’d originally wanted to keep all of his clothes and save them for the next baby her and Tony had been planning to have once Harry had started nursery. But she knew that was now no longer possible; not just because her and Tony were no longer together but because there was a very likely chance that the chemotherapy she was having today would make her infertile. She’d battled with the idea of having her eggs removed and frozen so that if she wanted another baby in the future; should she meet someone else; she had that option. But doing that would delay her treatment for another few weeks and she knew she couldn’t be selfish. She thanked God every day for Harry and had decided that he was enough of a blessing in her life; she didn’t need another child to make her happy.

And of COURSE the last chapter with the girls, messing around and having fun. Gorgeous. I loved, loved, loved it.

Can't wait to see Tony's reaction to Rach's Leukaemia...

Update soon.

Edited January 13, 2010 by flyingwithoutwings

[Danni02]

Aw that was a great chapter.

I loved how Leah and Martha were with Rachel. It was so sweet.

Looking forward to seeing how Tony reacts to the news.

Update soon.

[TachelHolden]

Omg how sad was that? Im nearly crying I can't begin to imagine how Rachel's feeling but to have Tony there with her and knowing she still loves him was so sad. I thought it was written perfectly , so cute she went to sleep in his arms because thats where she feels safe. Awwww poor Tony crying now he wishes he didnt leave her and feels bad. I hope that him and Gina have a nice chat sisterly love and all and all Rachel wanted was to be close to her husband making me all sad. I do love this fic and where its going i really don't want Rachel to die because i want Tachel and Harry back together.

A lot of support there from Leah and Martha , theyre good friends Rachel is really lucky to have them.