A Journey of Love

[callyha]

Oh my gosh, Poor Charlie! Poor Ruby!

Poor Everyone! I feel for all of them, Charlie for been so broken, Ruby for not knowing how to grieve without her mum for support and Angelo for finding Charlie on the beach!

Hope Charlie's ok!

More soon please

[Inactive User]

Whoa this is such a sad but great chapter!

Poor Ruby and Angelo, Jo-Jo beginning pushed away by Charlie

Whoa at the ending!! Hope Charlie is okay

Update soon please xx

[charlie29]

Thanks for all the comments, sorry for the long wait in updating, have been away

Chapter 32 - Help Me

Angelo shook Charlie again and was relieved when she fluttered her eyes open.

"Charlie, what have you done?! How much have you taken?"

"What are you talking about Angelo? Stop shouting at me, my head is pounding"

"The pills Charlie, for goodness sake, how much have you taken?"

Charlie sat up looking confused and saw the pills scattered around her. She smiled and then started to laugh.

"How can you find this so amusing Charlie? I need to get you to the hospital" Angelo said angrily.

"Angelo, calm down. They are pain killers, I had a terrible headache so I took a couple. The wind must have blown the pot over and they must have fallen out. Oh my God, you thought I had tried to kill myself didn't you?"

"What was I supposed to think Charlie? You have been so broken the last week, then I find you unconscious on the beach surrounded by alcohol and pills. I was so scared, I thought I'd lost you"

"Well if you look closer, you'll see I haven't touched the vodka, and I wasn't unconscious. I haven't slept for about 4 days, I thought if I laid down for a while, then I'd feel better"

Angelo sat down next to Charlie and held her as she started to cry.

"It's ok baby. I'm sorry for shouting at you, and I'm sorry for trying to force you to go to the funeral. I just want you to be alright again. You have hardly touched Joseph the last few days, and I know Ruby is struggling without you. We all need you Charlie, just as much as you need us. Let us help you, please"

"I'll try. And you are right, I do need to go to the funeral, it's the only way I'm going to get closure from all this. I want to feel better Angelo, I honestly do, I just don't know how to do it"

"Let's just get through today, and we'll sort everything else out tomorrow. It will all be ok Charlie, one day, it will all be ok"

"Thank-you Angelo. And I'm sorry for the things I said to you back at the house. I have neglected little JoJo and poor Rubes, I can't thank you enough for looking after them"

Angelo helped Charlie up from the sand, and they walked back to the house. They were met at the door by Ruby, who was dressed in a long black dress. She was carrying Joseph who looked up and smiled at Charlie. She held out her arms for him and gave him a big cuddle. After she had spent some time with him, she handed him to Angelo and went to find Ruby. Charlie found Ruby sitting out in the garden.

"Hey Rubes, you look beautiful"

"Why aren't you coming mum? I don't understand why you don't want to say goodbye"

"I am coming. I have been so confused over the last few days, and I haven't felt well. I woke up this morning with a terrible headache, and I felt like I couldn't cope with it all. Dad always told me I was the strong one, but the truth is I've been lying to myself all these years"

"What do you mean?"

"I've always told myself that I am the strong one. So many bad things have happened in my life Ruby, and I have never dealt with any of them properly, which is why I am so messed up now. I felt ashamed, that it was my fault that dad died. I know it's not, but that's the way I feel. I felt so guilty that I couldn't face going to the funeral. Then Angelo found me on the beach, and he thought I had done something stupid, and it changed me"

"What did he think you'd done?" Ruby asked, wary of the answer.

"I spilt some pills on the beach, and had a bottle of vodka with me. He couldn't wake me up at first and he thought I'd tried to kill myself. I saw the look on his face, and it still haunts me. He looked so lost, and I knew that I had to start getting back to normal. That's why I am coming to the funeral. I am sorry I haven't been there for you Rubes. I have wanted to, but I could barely help myself. But that is all going to change now. I promise, I am going to become the mother you will be proud of"

"I'll always be proud of you mum"

Charlie hugged her daughter and then went to get changed. Two hours later, and they were standing at the graveside, watching the coffin lower into the ground.

Ruby stepped forward. Ross was a wonderful man. I am proud to call him my grandfather, although for most of my life, he was my father. He was kind and considerate, and he loved his family. I know he was an amazing police officer, and he will be greatly missed. I love you. Ruby started to cry, and was comforted by Morag as she watched Charlie step forward.

Charlie stared at the coffin, and her prepared speech went out of her head. She cleared her throat and began to speak. I have dreaded this day for so long that I can't believe it is actually happening. I will miss you so much dad, and I am so sorry that it all came to this. You see, if it wasn't for me, my dad would still be here today. I made him carry so much guilt over all these years, that eventually the stress killed him. Angelo ran up to Charlie, to try and stop her from speaking, but was pushed away. People keep telling me that it's not my fault, but I know deep down it is. I'm sorry dad, I love you so much and I will miss you forever. Charlie looked around at the shocked faces, and then ran from the graveside. Angelo ran after her, and found her sitting on a bench, crying.

"Hey, Charlie, come on now, don't cry" Angelo was at a loss at what to say to her.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. But in a funny way I feel better now. I feel like it was my chance to say sorry to dad, and now I can move on. I want to get better Angelo. Help me"

"I will give you all the help you need baby. I want you to start your counselling again, you were doing so well, and I know you can do it Charlie"

"With your help I can do anything"

Charlie cuddled into Angelo, and both had a smile on their faces.

[Danni02]

Loved that update.

I am so glad that Charlie didnt try to kill herself and that she decided to go to the funeral, but still sad that she blames herself for her dad's death, but she seems to have found peace with it so thats good. I loved the chats she had with Ruby and Angelo. The ending was sweet. I hope Charlie continues with her counselling!

Update soon

[callyha]

That was a great update.

Very sweet and touching at the same time

I'm glad Charlie only fell asleep and that she didn't try to kill herself.

Those speeches Charlie and Ruby gave were so touching, and I'm glad Charlie feels like she has found a way to find comfort/peace with Ross; even if everyone was shocked.

I loved the part with Charlie and Ruby, how Charlie is going to be the best mother to her and how Ruby replied saying that she is proud of her

I'm so glad Angelo is there for Charlie, bless him

And JoJo, smiling at his mum aww how sweet xx

More soon please

[HighwayUnicorn]

Deleted.

[Inactive User]

Great chapter

Phew!! I am glad Charlie didn't do anything stupid.

Loved the speeches Charlie and Ruby spoke at the funeral

Update soon xx

[charlie29]

Thanks again for all the lovely comments It's only a short one this time.

Chapter 33 - Better Times

It had been three days since the funeral, and things were starting to improve in the Rosetta household. Charlie had arranged another counselling session for the day after the funeral, and she had forgotten how much better things felt after talking to Daniel. Charlie sat in bed and remembered the session.

"So Charlie, I haven't seen you for a while. What has been happening?" Daniel asked

"I've made a bit of a mess of everything actually. My dad passed away last week, and I fell apart. I keep thinking it's my fault that he's gone and I couldn't deal with that. I have been a terrible mother, and wife. I honestly don't know how Angelo has not walked out on me this week" Charlie replied.

"Why do you say that?"

"We had a fight on the day of the funeral. I stormed out of the house and went down to the beach. I hadn't slept for days and had been using alcohol to help me get through each day. Angelo found me asleep on the beach surrounded by pills and alcohol and he thought the worst. He was so angry at me, until he realised he had made a mistake. I would never kill myself, I couldn't do that to my family. But I am broken at the moment, and I have no idea if anyone can fix me"

"That's what I am here for Charlie. And if you remember back to before your dad sadly passed away, you were doing really well. You were starting to really open up, and you were feeling positive for the first time in a long while. You need to be brave and soldier on through this, and I promise with my help, you can have your life back"

"You really believe that?"

"I know it"

Charlie was brought out of her dream by Angelo handing her a cup of coffee.

"Mmm, thank-you" Charlie breathed in the scent of the coffee and smiled at Angelo.

"I was just thinking about my counselling. Do you think Daniel is right? Will I ever be back to normal?"

"I can't promise you will ever be normal Charlie, but that's what makes you special! But on a serious note, yes, I think hopefully one day in the future you will feel a lot better and we can have our life back"

"You have been the most amazing husband. I'm not going to get all mushy on you, but I really couldn't have got this far without you"

"You can get mushy if you like" Angelo responded and gave Charlie a lingering kiss on the lips. Charlie smiled and returned the gesture.

"That was nice, we haven't been this close in a long time" Angelo said.

"I know, that's my fault. I will make more effort, I promise"

"Charlie, it's not your fault. Stop blaming yourself for everything. All I want is my wife well again, and our family back together"

"Talking of which, we need to start planning our little mans first birthday. I can't believe a whole year has gone by. We have been through so much, it all feels like it happened yesterday"

"What shall we do for his birthday?"

"I think we should go away as a family for the weekend. I don't think I can deal with people coming over right now. I want it just to be us, Ruby and JoJo"

"That sounds like a wonderful idea. I will have a look at some places and see what we can book"

Just then, the sound of Joseph crying flooded into the bedroom.

"Sounds like little man is awake, I'll go and get him" Angelo went to get out of bed.

"No. Let me, please. I need to start spending some proper time with him. I have neglected him, and I need to make up for it"

"Ok" Angelo watched with a smile as Charlie left the bedroom to tend to their son. Over the last few weeks, Charlie had lost interest in doing anything around the house. She had spent most of her time in bed, and Angelo had been worried about the amount of time Charlie had spent away from Ruby and Joseph. It seemed that a different Charlie had come back from the counselling, and she was starting to look forward to life again.

Charlie walked into Joseph's bedroom, and fought back tears as she saw the smiling face of her son as he saw his mummy coming to get him. Charlie had felt so bad for neglecting him, but she had not had the strength to care for him. She picked him up out of his cot and cuddled him.

"Oh I love you so much my little JoJo. Mummy is so sorry for not looking after you, but she's not been well. I promise I will try very hard to get better and I will be able to look after you again"

"Mum, mum" Joseph gurgled back at her, and Charlie burst into tears. It was the first time she had heard Joseph speak.

"Oh you are so clever JoJo, and you said mummy first!" Charlie said through her tears.

"Hey mum, why are you crying?" Ruby asked as she entered the room.

"JoJo just said his first word, he said 'mum'!"

"Oh well-done Joseph! You made mummy cry!" Ruby laughed. It was nice to see Charlie taking care of Joseph again. Ruby was old enough to accept that it was not her mum's fault, but even she had missed being able to talk to Charlie.

"You look better today mum" Ruby said.

"Do you know what? I feel better today. Just spending time at home with my wonderful family is the best medicine. I am so sorry I haven't been there for you Rubes, I know you have been finding things tough. We are going to go away for Joseph's birthday and I promise you that we will spend some quality time together"

"That sounds lovely mum. I love you"

"I love you too Rubes"

"Mum, mum" Joseph gurgled again as Angelo entered the room.

"Wow!! My little man is talking!"

"Yes, and did you notice what word he said!" Charlie said, teasing Angelo.

"The most important one of course" Angelo said, leaning over and giving Charlie a kiss.

The four of them sat together for the first time in a while, talking and laughing. It definately was better times.

[Danni02]

Aww that was lovely! I am so glad that Charlie went back to counselling and it seems to have done her the world of good! "I can't promise you will ever be normal Charlie, but that's what makes you special!" I had a little chuckle at that bit. But it was sweet. I loved their talk And JoJo is nearly one! Oh my! And he said his first word! Soooo cute! Love the ending with the four of them together. I think a nice little break from the bay and some family time could do Charlie the world of good!

Loving this, cant wait for more!

[callyha]

Great update! I loved it!!

I'm so glad Charlie going to conselling seems to be helping.

And the line where Angelo said: "I can't promise you will ever be normal Charlie, but that's what makes you special!" I was like

How cute!" JoJo is nearly one and his first words were mum mum! Aww, loved the ending with the four of them, such a lovely image

More soon please