Quick Fanfiction Contest Archive

[tessalove]

Ok..... I'm really stuck between 1 & 6, There both really great.

I loved number one, It was really good, The emotion was brilliant! I loved the last line, it was so simple, but affective! Bringing Mattie back was really good as well, It really tied in with the story!

Number was really great as well, Bringing Aden's abuse into it and having him leaving was great, The emotion and the power fo the story was really good, It was a really sweet story and I loved the ending!

They were all so good! This was a great round!!

My vote goes for Number 1, That was my favourite!

[TelephotoMarigold]

Entry One:

Brings together a range of characters. Good flow.

Entry Two:

The fic was well written but would have liked to have seen some hesitation on Aden's part because of all the goodbye's and seeing what he would be missing by going ahead with it.

Entry Three:

Brings me back to the wonderful on/off days of Drew and Belle. Nice simple story.

Entry Four:

Nice pacing. Good writing. The list of reasons for Geoff to stay get narrowed down to one.

Entry Five:

I like Changleo. The relationship has a strength to it. This is a good story. Basic background and nice conclusion.

Entry Six:

Nice story. Good content. Flows well. Good pacing.

Overall I vote for .... Entry.... ah.. this is so hard.... erm.... can I chose two of them??? No? ok then.... Entry 1.... With a mention for Entries 4 and 5....

Well done everyone who sat down and wrote for us....

Tele

xx

[Red Ranger 1]

Okay, you appear to have caught me in a bad mood, so I’m sorry if some of these are a bit more critical than usual.

Entry #1 was a nice idea but unfortunately it felt like you didn’t really do anything with it.Matilda’s reaction to Belle’s death is a good starting point and the best bit of the story was the little flashback to Miles phoning her and her collapse.But other than that it felt as though she just came to town, chatted to Aden for a bit and then said goodbye to a group of silent characters and I’m afraid it just felt a bit inconsequential.

Entry #2 unfortunately seemed to go on a bit too long, with Aden having pretty much the same conversation with too many people.My favourite bit was the little moment where he upsets Geoff’s pool game, as though he couldn’t resist the temptation to wind him up one last time.I did think the ending was nicely ambiguous though.

Entry #3 earns points for a tight focus, with just two characters saying goodbye.It was a nice assessment of Belle and Drew’s relationship and the way that sometimes you have to let the person you love go for both your sakes.My biggest problem with it was that Belle’s shift in attitude seemed a bit too abrupt, it only took a couple of comments from Drew for her to change from begging him to stay to never wanting to see him again and it didn’t quite ring true.

Entry #4 starts with a very long exchange of dialogue which made me wonder if it was going to be entirely dialogue.That would have been an interesting experiment but in the end it fell awkwardly between too stools, with not enough insight into the characters’ thoughts yet the fact there was some left me wanting more.The characters were captured well and the arguments believable although Nicole’s presence seemed unnecessary, just another way to cause tension between Geoff and Ruby.Although it set things up well, the ending was slightly abrupt and made it feel like a part of something longer.

Entry #5 had an interesting set-up, with Angelo discussing the situation with Ruby, a semi-outsider, and them both giving their perspective of someone that they love but have difficulty getting along with.I thought that would be it so it was a nice surprise when Charlie turned up and they came to an understanding.I liked the understated ending as well, they don’t fall into each other’s arms and live happily ever after but there’s a glimmer of hope.

Entry #6 was another interesting idea but unfortunately I found the prose a bit rambling.Maybe that’s appropriate, Aden’s thoughts were cluttered, but it made it hard to get into and empathise with him.The conversation seemed to have a few abrupt shifts as well with Belle’s attitude towards him changing constantly but it was an interesting look at a different way things could have gone for them.

I hope everyone finds that constructive and so I’m casting my vote for Entry #5.

[Danni02]

Oh my! They are all so good its hard to pick just one.

Entry 5 gets my vote.

I really liked the opening and the scene was set well. I was expecting Charlie and Angelo to reuinte at the end but I liked how it was understated with, I believe, a small glimmer of hope for the future.

[Inactive User]

I voted for Entry 4 and 5. They were both well-written and great

[Georgia]

First Place: Miranda (Entry 5)

Second Place: Matticus01 (Entry 1)

Third Place: tessalove (Entry 4)

Thanks also to adellejefferiesxox, meant2live and ish_the_angel for their amazing enteries.

Miranda, host away

[Miranda]

Good evening/ morning to you. Here are the competition entries for Quick Fanfic Number 3.

Please vote for your favourite [one only] by 12 noon on Sunday 22nd November GMT [11am AEST on Monday 23rd November I think].

Entry 1

That girl; that beautiful girl must be mine... I long for Belle Taylor to be my valentine... well maybe my secret valentine...

Her radiant skin, her glistening brown eyes shimmer in the sun. I work along side her most nights, intoxicated by her beauty and her scent, rose oil no doubt. She carried the same scent as my mother. I knew this girl was special, from the very moment I laid eyes on her. But I knew she was way out of my reach. I was a no body; no one cared about Aden Jefferies – not even me. I hated myself....I had no future.....no hope.....no dreams....

“If you want to show a girl that you love her you need to shower her with roses and chocolates” Colleen boasted to Geoff, Valentine’s Day was coming up. Great....such an American tradition if you ask me, but I will admit....it was a good enough reason for me to be open and honest about my feelings for Belle. I knew exactly what she would say if I even consider revealing my true feelings. At first she wouldn’t believe me then...well I can only begin to imagine what kind of ear full I would cop from her. Belle certainly had a way with words. I don’t think there had been a time in her life when she was speechless, but this was just one of her qualities which I had fallen in love with....another reason to add to my long list of reasons why I am in love with this gorgeous creature.

“Move it...” Belle hissed at me, I would always try and make work a little bit difficult for her. To come to think of it, making work slightly harder than it already is... was a pretty dumb idea....but it was the only way I knew how to express my feelings for her....at least for now. Desperation must have kicked in as I began to listen to Colleen’s advice, now I must be losing my mind, indefinitely.

“Show her the key to your heart, spoil her.....love her.....give her expensive gifts...” Colleen clapped her hands as she spoke to Irene, who was rolling her eyes the entire time of her rant. I listen from the kitchen; I couldn’t exactly ask Axel for love advice or even my father for that matter.

So I made a plan, this plan was probably the dumbest idea I’ve ever come up with and it most likely wouldn’t be a success but I had to try...I had to try and get myself closer to her - the girl of my dreams. The first step was to leave anonymous notes – I had chosen out romantic love quotes, written them on fancy paper. Each day I’d leave them for Belle. Belle would either find them first thing in the morning or just after she left work that day. I’ll never forget the look on her beautifully caved face when she read my first note. Her eyes lit up with love and happiness. It was a great feeling knowing you were the reason behind her smile each day. Then I began to bring her chocolates, then flowers – Irene even began to take an interest and she was just as thrilled as Belle. But the harsh reality always hit me, lowering my self confidence – I knew if Irene and Belle knew the truth. If they knew it was really me secretly leaving these gifts for Belle. Any chance of making Belle mine would fail. Why did love always have to be so complicated, why couldn’t it be simple? Why couldn’t I have her all to my self?

She was the girl I loved.

Then I decided to take a step further, I knew would be risky. But I didn’t care I was eager to hold her, to kiss her luscious lips. I had left a note in a place I knew she would find, the note had read “Meet me here after dark, make sure you’re alone and we shall dance the night away. From your secret admirer”

That night after everyone had left, Belle remained in the diner. Irene and I left the diner together. Irene knew why Belle would be staying behind. “Night love, have a good one” She waved good – bye. “Yeah, bye Belle” I farewelled her too, if I left with Irene, there was no way Belle would find out it was really me. Irene closed the door behind us. I made sure no one including Irene could see me go back into the diner. Belle luckily wasn’t facing the door. I snuck up behind her covering her eyes quickly before she could turn around. “Oh my....” Belle giggled. I had brought a ribbon with me to tie around her eyes. I couldn’t have her seeing me. I took her hand after I had tied the ribbon around her head, covering her eyes. As much as I wanted to look deep into her eyes, I didn’t want to see her reaction as she discovered her real secret admirer. My hand entwined with hers, I moved side to side letting her know that I wanted to dance with her. Never had I felt so close to anyone before. I could feel a connection between us already; it was as if she was a magnetic pulling me closer and closer to her. Belle giggled, “I must say you’re a fine dancer”

I smiled at her, even though I knew she couldn’t see me. I touched her face, trailing my hand down her cheek, and then I did the impossible I leaned closer, and my lips just millimetres apart from her cheek. I pressed my lips down, Belle giggled. “That was nice”

We continued to dance; her head was in the crook of my neck. The smell of her hair was so intoxicating. “So are you at least going to tell me your name” Belle smiled as we danced. I coughed implying the answer no. “Please...you know my name.....I need to know the name of my secret admirer”

There was no way she was going to learn the truth tonight. I wanted this night to be perfect, a memorable night – if she knew the truth, it would be ruined. Belle felt my face and then ran her fingers through my hair. “So soft....” Belle was pleased. “I’d really love it if I knew who you were....”

I coughed again. “Please” She whispered. Then she did the unthinkable and I was stupid enough for letting her do it, but I was weakened by her touch. I couldn’t bring myself to stop her. She removed the blind fold. “Don’t worry, if you’re worried about being seen as ugly I’m a fairly open minded person” Belle laughed, then her eyes were uncovered – she saw me and possibility for the very first time. “Oh...Aden...” Belle said she looked horrified. “Oh I see what’s going on....this was some cruel joke to get me into bed wasn’t it” Belle snapped at me. “What no”

“How dumb do you think I am...I can’t believe I fell for your stupid little tactics” Belle threw the ribbon to the ground and stormed to the door. “Belle, wait...it wasn’t like that” I pleaded blocking her from leaving. “Oh really then what was it like?”

“Belle I swear....I really do....” Then I stopped, I wasn’t ready to admit my feelings for her – not out loud at least. “Really do what?”

I swallowed, my heart raced, I can’t do this. I can’t tell her how I feel. “Belle...I.....” Still can’t do this, she’ll laugh at me; she’ll think I’m a stupid jerk. She hates me. “I....” I took a deep breath. “I care about you....”

“Yeah right” Belle laughed at me. “I like you I do, but I knew you wouldn’t believe me – this is why I went to all this trouble for you. But it was nothing but a waste of time. You hate me, I hate me. From now on I’ll promise to leave you alone. You deserve better than some low life” I was about to leave when she spoke up. “Aden”

“What” I said losing hope. “You went to all this trouble just to tell me that you like me, yet you didn’t want me to know it was you, but you still hoped that some how I’d fall for you...”

Okay, that made no logical sense. “Yeah...”

“Did you even stop to consider the fact, that I might actually like you already?” I couldn’t believe what she had just said. Belle likes me...? How can this be?

“No...I didn’t think about that” I whispered feeling really low. “Why are you so quiet....I thought there was something you wanted to ask me?”

“There is?” I asked having no idea what she was going on about. “Fine I’ll ask you.....Aden will you be my Valentine”

I nodded, she came closer. She eyes fixed on me, “Perfect” She smiled she closed her eyes as did I. We embraced. I kissed her irresistible lips. That special girl was mine – all mine. Never had I felt so much happiness in my life.

Entry 2

I stare the page in front of me.

Dear Aden.

That’s all I have come up with so far. How do I tell him how I really feel? I chew on the end of the pen for a moment, deep in thought.

“Can I get you anything?” Colleen’s voice interrupts. She tries to get a glimpse at my letter but I manage to cover it up before she sees anything. “Writing a love letter?” She asks.

“I’ll grab another OJ please Colleen,” I tell her. I’m not about to share my secrets with the town’s biggest gossip.

“You know, I used to be quite the writer in my day,” Colleen informs me.

I smile at her, still keeping my work hidden.

“So if you need any help with writing your little love notes all you have to do is ask.”

The old woman scuttles back towards the kitchen. I can’t be bothered get annoyed. I’m in such a good mood today. Aden and I had hung out at the beach together for a few hours this afternoon and I’m almost certain we had a ‘moment’ or two. We’d splashed around in the water, lazed in the sun, and talked about heaps of stuff.

I’d made the decision to put my feelings down on paper and see what happens.

I pull my letter out again.

Dear Aden.

It was harder than I thought it would be.

I really love hanging out with you.

Nope. That wasn’t what I wanted to write. I scribble it out and begin again on a fresh sheet of paper.

Dear Aden.

I don’t know how to say this, so I’m just going to go ahead and say it. I really like you.

Nup. Maybe I could try poetry.

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I really like you

Do you like me too?

Ok, so my poetry sucks pretty bad. I decide that I should be completely honest and put it all out there.

Dear Aden.

The time we’ve spent together has been amazing. You’re so easy to talk to and I always have fun when I’m with you. I would really like to get to know you better and see where it takes us.

If you like the idea, please meet me tomorrow night at the wharf.

xox

When I’m finally happy with it I place it in an envelope and make my way over to Aden’s house. I hesitate for a moment before posting it in his letterbox, hoping that my plan works. I pop the love note through the slot before I can change my mind and walk away.

I have a little over 24 hours to set up for the romantic rendezvous I have planned. In my mind I picture us sitting on a picnic blanket on the wharf, eating prawns and strawberries, sipping wine and watching the sun go down together.

I can barely sleep that night. Did he get my note? Does he know who it’s from? Will he meet me at the wharf?

Next morning I begin my preparations. I grab a big picnic basket and fill it up with all my favourite picnic goodies.

I head down to the Diner to grab some of the muffins that I know Aden loves. I see him sitting at one of the booths, sipping a drink and chatting with Irene. I notice he has my letter in his hands so I do my best to eavesdrop on the conversation without being too obvious.

“Any idea who it’s from?” I hear Irene ask.

“No, I’m really not sure,” Aden tells her. “I know who I would like it to be, but it’s not very likely.”

“So are you going to meet them?”

“You know what?” Aden grins. “I think I will.”

I start to feel a little sick in the stomach. I have no idea who he hopes it will be, but I’m pretty sure he won’t be expecting me. I check to make sure he hasn’t noticed me standing behind him and duck over to the counter. I choose the muffins and go home to finish getting organized.

The afternoon seems to go on forever. I can hardly wait for evening to come. My confidence returns a little after a long shower as I check myself out in the mirror.

I pick up the picnic basket and head down to the beach. I almost forget the blanket and curse myself as I turn back to collect it. Now I’m worried I’ll be late.

When I get to the wharf there is no sign of Aden. I hope he hasn’t changed his mind, but I remind myself I hadn’t actually specified what time I wanted to meet up. I lay out the blanket and place the platters of food on it. I grab the bottle of wine and glasses and place them next to the rug, then proceed to rearrange the plates several times.

I look at my watch. It’s just after 7pm. I look around and see no sign of the man who has captured my heart. I walk to the end of the wharf and sit down with my legs hanging down near the water. The sun’s not quite ready to set yet, but has turned the sky a gorgeous peach colour. I close my eyes and inhale the fresh air as I listen to the sound of the water splashing against the wood of the wharf frame.

I don’t hear the footsteps as Aden approaches. He kisses the back of my neck and smiles as I turn around to face him.

“I’m glad you came,” I grin.

“Me too,” he tells me, pulling me towards him.

We kiss for a few moments and hold hands as we make our way over to the picnic.

“Wow! This is amazing!” Aden tells me, looking at the spread I have prepared.

“Nothing but the best for you,” I say, inviting him to take a seat.

“I was hoping the letter was from you.” He pauses for a moment then looks up at me and continues. “I feel the same way, Geoff”.

Entry 3

There it was again, a single rose left on my door step I pick it up and read the note that’s attached, they never say much, just to Ruby xxx or a little message, today’s was different though it had a longer message on it.

Ruby, your the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen,

you would make any guy happy to call you his girlfriend.

Your kind Caring and your so special!

One day when I get the guts to reveal my identity I hope you will be mine, I hope these aren’t stupid or tacky, It’s just my way of showing you what you mean to me, xxx

Every time I get one of these I can’t help it but smile, I’ve never been treated like this, they leave notes, poems, flowers, teddy’s and other things, I have a small collection developing in my room, I just wish I knew who it was, who ever he was, he was obviously sweet and he knew how to treat girl instead of just jumping straight in, But what if he wasn’t thinking like that? What if he was some sort of creep? What if it wasn’t even a him? Or worse what if this was some big joke?

I just can’t help wondering who it is, every minute of the day I think about him; in my head he’s hot! And he’s caring and he’s romantic, I find myself day dreaming all the time, wondering if anything will be waiting at my door when I get home, I haven’t told anyone about it yet, I can’t help it, I don’t know what they’ll think, I want to tell Nicole, but she can get pretty jealous or she’ll try and get the thoughts of the sweet, dreamy hot guy out of my head and convince me he’s a weirdo.

I change my mind about telling her, It’s just so amazing I want everyone to know, but then I convince myself otherwise, What if he finds out I’m spreading it about, he’ll never want to reveal himself! So instead I decide on just telling my best friend, she’s coming around after school, this would be the perfect time to find something on the door step! And I do, there it is a small heart shaped box of chocolates! “Ohh, what’s that!” Nic asked, obviously interested, I smile and pick up the box; I detach the little note carful before explaining everything to her.

“I have a secret admirer!” I smile

“What? And you haven’t told me?”

“I haven’t told anyone, I keep getting things on the door step, Mostly flowers and stuff” I can’t help but grinning, I try to hide it but it’s too obvious to hide

“That’s so romantic! Have you any idea who it is?”

“No” I half frown, “There’s nothing obvious, I can’t tell who it is”

“”You have no clue?”

“Nope, not a even a little bit!”

“We so have to find out! This is like so cool!”

“How?”

“Well what all has he sent you?”

I take Nic upstairs and open up my wardrobe, and there in the bottom is everything I have ever gotten, I pressed the flowers before the died so that I could keep them, All the teddies were there and the boxes that the chocolates came in, and A small box filled with all the notes and poems.

“Wow” her eyes widened, “That is so much!”

“I know, It’s been going on for about two weeks now, and I usually get something everyday”

“Your so lucky! I want an admirer!”

“You have a boyfriend Nic!”

“Yeah, but even still I don’t get all of this!”

“But you never know, this could just be someone’s idea of a joke! Or even worse it could be some creepy guy!”

“I doubt it, They wouldn’t go through all this trouble just for a stupid prank!”

“Yeah I suppose”

“No supposing! We need to get to the bottom of this! We need a plan!”

“But Nic, What if this isn’t what it seems? I mean why would anyone go through all this just for me? I’m not special!”

“You are special Rubes! Your special to me, I wouldn’t be the same without you, and your obviously special to this guy! So were going to find out who it is and make you happy!” She smiled

“Aww Nic, I love you!”

“What are besties for? I love you too!”

This was it, I was going to find out whom my admirer was, before school Nic came around and she planted a camera, she switched it one and made sure it was well hidden, we went to school, and we were coming back at lunch to check it.

The day seemed to drag in; I was so excited but so nervous! I couldn’t wait to get home!

Finally the lunch Belle rang, I launched of my seat and straight out of the doors, were a rather inpatient looking Nicole was waiting we rushed home, grabbed the video camera and plunged down onto the sofa, she hit play and watched it, we watched about the first five minutes, until she had the sense to fast forward, when we saw a figure she stopped and rewinded to the moment he entered, Both of us gasped and our eye’s widened, “No way! No freaking way!” She almost screamed

“Umm, Well this is umm interesting!” I said nervously, Geoff had left a single rose on the ground, we hadn’t managed to pick it up but on the video it was Geoff, I was still in shock as was Nicole who sat silently playing the video over and over

“What is my boyfriend doing leaving you flowers and love notes?”

“Nic are you ok?”

“Not really! Is my boyfriend cheating on me?”

“I don’t know, can you call it cheating?”

“It’s sort of like cheating! He’s obviously not into me! Why would he do this?”

“Geoff loves you Nic!”

“So why is he doing this?”

“I don’t know, we need to figure this out!”

“Come on”

“Where?” I asked nervously

“I need to ask him! He’ll be at the diner!”

Before I could say anything Nicole had pulled me to my feet and we were on are way to the diner at a rapid pace, “Geoffrey Campbell” she yelled as soon as she set eyes on him

“Hey, Are you ok?”

“No, no I’m certainly not ok!”

“Ok, Nic what’s wrong?”

“Why on earth are you leaving flowers for Ruby on her doorstep?”

“Oh Nic, Can we not do this here”

“So it’s true? Your cheating on me?”

“No! Of course not! Nic I love you”

“So what’s with all this stuff your leaving for her? And the love notes?”

“That wasn’t from me, I was doing a favour for a mate”

“Yeah right, that’s an original one!”

“I’m serious! Do you really think I’d do that to you?”

“I don’t really know what to think! Who was the mate?”

“I can’t really say Nicole”

“Why not? Why can’t you say Geoff!” She screamed, “If you care about me in the slightest you would tell me!”

“Nic you know I love you, but I can’t do that to him, I promised him”

“I don’t understand Geoff, I don’t even know if I can trust you! Why can’t you tell me? I’m your girlfriend!”

“It’s me” A voice came from the corner of the room “Geoff has nothing to do with this, I asked him to do me this favour because I couldn’t I had to work, I assure you”

“You? Oh my god!” Nicole screamed, happiness now entering her words! “I’m sorry, It just scared me, I didn’t want you to like someone else!”

“I could never like anyone else!”

“Aww” Nic blushed “So you’s two have a bit of talking to do! Don’t ya think?” Nicole winked at Ruby, who had remained silent for the whole of the event

“Well ruby, would you like to go down to the beach?” Romeo asked

She nodded her head, Romeo had been the one to send her everything, the sweet, dreamy not to mention hot guy of her dreams, When she thought about it, it seemed so surreal, When se thought was this guy would be like, she pictured some old weird creepy guy, or a stalker, she never once imagined it to be Romeo they boy she had been crushing on since he came to town. For Ruby her dream had just became a reality.

Entry 4

I walk off the bus and swing my bag over my shoulder. I take a deep breath and exhale slowly as I look out to the Ocean. I walk about 200 metres along the road and stop in front of a sign. ‘Welcome to Summer Bay’ it read and I feel a smile come to my face. I was home. I read the sign once more before walking down the path and on to the beach. It’s there where I see her for the first time, for the first time in almost a year. I smile to myself as I think of all the happy times we had together before I left her. I can’t believe I was so stupid to leave someone as great as her. She looks up in my direction and I find her smiling and waving. I smile and wave back and find myself thinking that this is going to be easier than I thought. I hadn’t even been back 5 minutes and I’d seen her already and by the looks of things I was going to be talking to her any second now. I take a deep breath and start to walk in her direction. Then I see someone running past me and lifting her into his arms. I stop walking immediately and put my head in my hands. Of course she would have met someone else. Who wouldn’t want to be with her? I look up again to find them embraced in a passionate kiss. I feel as though my heart is being ripped out. That should be me kissing her. I try to turn away and not watch but I can’t seem to stop myself. I want to see who it is. After what seemed like a lifetime they eventually pull apart and my heart sinks as I see the man standing with her. It was Roman Harris. She was back with her ex. They had dated before we had. I envied him. He had Charlie the woman of my dreams but he just didn’t treat her with any respect. I even took her out on a date, showed her how things should be but she still chose him over me. Eventually it all ended in tears, more so on Charlie’s part and a few months later I found myself dating her. I was so happy. It was the best six months of my life. Then I made the stupid decision of choosing my career over my personal life and just like that I lost her. But now I was back in the Bay and I wasn’t going to lose her again.

It was a few days since I saw her on the beach with him and I hadn’t ran into her again. I hadn’t been out the house much as I mostly didn’t want to have to witness her all over Roman in public again. I take a deep breath and rise to my feet. I decide it was time to go see her and declare my love for her. I walk out of my house and along the road to Charlie’s place as quickly as I can, scared that I will change my mind. Part of me wants to leave her to be happy, even if it does have to be with him. But a bigger part of me wants to tell her how much I love her and have her running into my arms with her telling me she feels the same. I arrived at her house and take a deep breath before I open the gate and walk up the path to the door. I glance in the window quickly but almost immediately regret it as I see him with his arms wrapped around her. I stop walking and turn around. I can’t tell her now with her boyfriend there listening. I let out a sigh before walking back down the path but stopping just as I reach the gate. I take a deep breath and turn back around. I was going to tell her tonight. I walk back up the path and slowly bring my hand up to ring the door bell. A few seconds later and Charlie is standing at the door with the biggest look of shock on her face.

“Who is it? Tell them to get lost” Roman shouted as he walked across the room and stood behind Charlie. I take a deep breath before telling her.

“Charlie I still love. I want you back” I say with a huge grin on my face. But she stood there in silence not saying anything.

“She’s with me now” Roman shouted “Get lost” he said as she he pulled Charlie back into the room and stepped outside. I stand there not moving not saying anything. “I said get lost” Roman shouted again but I still stay standing there.

“I want to speak to Charlie” I say as I try to step in the house. Roman pushes me back and I stumble down the step.

“Roman” Charlie shouted as he pulled him back. They looked at each other and Roman sighed and walked into the house and out of sight. Charlie took a deep breath before talking to me.

“I loved you Angelo. And you left. I’ve moved on. I’m in love with someone else” Charlie said as I saw tears coming to her eyes.

“Tell me you love him more than me and I will go” I find myself saying although I can’t quite believe I’m saying it.

“I…I…love him” Charlie said as a tear rolled down her cheek

“You didn’t say more” I said hopingly.

“I love him. Please go” Charlie said and she slammed the door in my face. I stand there for a few seconds before turning and running all the way home. I slam my door shut and barely fall to the floor in tears when I hear my door bell. I jump up as quickly as I can and wipe the tears from my eyes and run to the door.

“How dare you do that? You come to my house and tell me you love me in front of my boyfriend after all this time” Charlie shouted

“Because I’m madly in love with you” I shout

“Well I don’t love you anymore” Charlie shouted

“Then how come you are still wearing the necklace I bought you” I shout and Charlie looks down and takes hold of the necklace in her right hand. She looks back up at me and our eyes meet. Her left hand moves forward takes hold of mine.

“I’ve never stopped loving you” Charlie said and we smile at each other.

Entry 5

Roman Harris normally started his day with a run on the beach. He would get out and do his warm up exercises; before heading down the road at a medium pace. After getting to the beach from there it was a couple of K to warm up and then another few K to stretch himself until he felt his muscles telling him to stop. He would stop somewhere and do other cardio exercises before heading home. The only thing different about this day was that when he got home there was a bright red rose lying on the doorstep. He carefully picked it up and found the gentle scent of the flower told him that this was a home grown bloom. The roses grown commercially looked beautiful but had very little scent.

He looked at the card attached to the bloom and read the words.

“To my secret flame, if you but knew my name you’d think this some kind of flirty game but your approval I do seek until then this bloom to keep. From your Secret Admirer….xxx”

He twirled the rose between his long tapered fingers and inhaled the scent some more before re-reading the card. It must be for Aden or Nic he decided taking the rose inside with him. He laid it carefully on the table while he searched for a vase, coming up with an empty jar he put the rose inside it and filled it up with water before he made his way up the stairs to grab a shower.

He thought about the rose all day trying to imagine who would send him something like that until he decided that it could only be for Aden or Nic. Probably Nic more than likely and felt a sense of disappointment. He closed up the diner later that normal and headed home. He opened the front door and moved inside heading into the kitchen. He saw the rose and smiled before catching the note stuck to the fridge from Nic. She had gone to the city with her mother and wouldn’t be back until tomorrow. He guessed from the silence pervading the house that Aden was staying with Belle. Well that left him and his new friend the rose he thought with a grin. He moved up the stairs and went straight to bed.

Roman overslept and decided not to go for his run as he crawled out of bed and went downstairs grabbing a bowl of museli for his breakfast before getting a shower and heading out. He stepped outside the front door and saw another parcel on the doorstep. He bent down and picked it up cautiously.

“Something sweet with which to tease. Something frothy designed to please. Have you guessed my name? With love, from your Secret Flame”

He looked at the cup of Cappuccino and the Chocolate Chip Cookie and frowned. They were from the diner. He would just ask Irene who had been in that morning. He took a sip of the coffee and smiled.

Whoever had bought it knew he liked his Cappuccino with sugar and extra foam.

Roman sat on the beach looking out at the sea. Irene hadn’t been able to give him any information on who had been in that morning saying that a group of school kids had been around. He sighed and stood brushing sand off him he made his way home.

There on the doorstep was another present. He looked around before approaching it and picking it up he peeled back the wrapping to reveal a box of chocolates.

“I’m guessing that you think this a silly game but in truth I’m scared to reveal my name so I may have to stay your secret flame. Here is something to keep you sweet while I suggest that you and I meet? Your secret flame.”

“Ok.” he muttered. “How are we going to arrange a meet when I don’t even know who you are.” He groaned. “And how the hell did you know these were my favourites.” He added moving into the house.

He avoided opening the chocolates for a long time telling himself that he would have to run an extra few K in penance if he did but even so as soon as he finished his dinner he opened the box and took one out and placed it in his mouth. The chocolate truffle melted and he sighed.

He got up the next morning and dressed ready for his run looking at the empty box of chocolates guiltily. Opening the front door he found a rose on the front porch and he picked it up and sniffed the fragrance before reading the note.

“No more excuses will be made, No more gifts to trade. I will be on the Pier at three. Will you be there to meet me? Your Secret Flame.”

He kept looking at his watch all day before finally making his excuses to Irene, and moving out of the diner door. He didn’t notice the bemused look from Colleen. He strode to the end of the Pier torn between being angry at the set up and intrigued.

“Leah?” he said quietly.

She turned and looked at him.

“Roman?” she asked in turn. “You’re my secret admirer?” she said puzzled.

Colleen moved towards them and looked at the pair of them.

“Sorry pets, it was me.” She murmured coming clean. “Well me and Madge Wilkins and others.”

“Colleen!” Leah muttered. “I thought I was being stalked.” She added trying to maintain her anger at the other woman in the face of her smile.

“Yeah.” Roman said.

“I’m sorry.” Colleen said, without actually sounding sorry.

“You have to admit this is pretty finny. I mean the idea that you would send me chocolates.” Leah murmured to him.

Roman looked at her crossly for a minute before he too grinned,

“Cappuccinos and roses?” he said.

“Well that is my fault I got the two mixed up. Leah was supposed to get the rose and you were ..” Colleen trailed off.

“That explains the Greek Cook Book.” Leah murmured into the silence.

“Would you like to take a walk along the beach.” Roman suggested.

Leah nodded and put her arm through his.

“Alone Colleen.” Roman added after a minute when the other woman started following them.

She moved back tot he diner and looked at Irene.

“Did it work?” Irene asked.

Colleen nodded.

“Now lets focus on Miles.” Irene said with a grin. “I think he needs a new girlfriend.”

Entry 6

My name is Matilda Hunter, I'm 17 years old, I have two amazing bestfriends; Belle and Cassie, and an amazing boyfriend; Ric, and in turn he has two bestfriends; Drew and Aden. Now you know the gang, we best get on with the story.

I've had my fair share of admirers. But even so, it surprises me to be standing here with a piece of paper in my hand with the scribblings of some love struck teenage boy and not knowing who it is. Oh I guess you want to know what the note says right?;

"Your eyes sparkle like perfect little twinkling lights,

If only I was the reason for their shine,

I wish I could have them forever in my sight,

You're the reason that my heart does pine."

Cheesy right? It was the fifth one this week, and it was only Wednesday morning. They were sweet, but becoming slightly annoying, I'd already deduced that Ric wasn't the one responsible.

No matter how much I love him, there is no way on earth that he was capable of something so romantic. Besides, he couldn't rhyme cat with mat if his life depended on it. Literature was not his strong point, to be honest, education wasn't his strong point.

So thats left me at a dead end of who's sent me the notes.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Ric swaggering towards me. I quickly stuff the note into the pocket of my school dress and close my locker.

"Morning sunshine." He smiles at me before placing a soft kiss on my lips. "Sorry, I couldn't walk you to school this morning."

"Thats okay. I made it on my own... just." Okay, the pout across my face right now, not necessary, but I just like to make him sweat, besides it made him kiss me again.

The bell rang to sound the first lesson.

"I'll see you soon." He smiles and walks off. Walking into my classroom I take my seat.

I check the note against an older one. Check, the hand writing matched; Check, the cheesniess matched;

"This note is written from the heart,

It helps me realise where to start,

I'll hold you dear, I'll hold you close,

Until I can find the courage to be man that you hold close."

"Dalby's a romantic? Man, wait til Curtis hears about this." My eyes widen in horror, as I realise Aden's presence. He quickly snatches one of the notes from my pencil case and reads it aloud.

"Your voice is like a song

It speaks to my soul

It opens up a part of me

That I would never known."

"Man that one doesn't even rhyme." Aden muses as I quickly snatch the note back from him.

"Stop it Aden." I mumble under my breath.

"You haven't told Cassie about these have you? Because if she expects me to go all sop-" I roll my eyes and have to interrupt him at this moment.

"Why would I tell Cass?"

"Because you girls tell each other everything." He has a point.

"But it's a secret, so please don't tell Ric." I'm practically begging with my eyes at this point. Please shrug and walk away, Aden. Dammit.

"Dalby didn't send them did he?"

Wow, I've got give him some credit, he got there faster than I thought he would. "No. Which is why, you have to keep it a secret."

"So, little ol' Hunter's got a secret admirer. Hang on, you're not doing the dirty behind Dalby's back with some poet society freak are you?"

"No I am not! I don't know who sent them, that's what I'm trying to figure out." I reply angrily at the accusation. I hear the mumblings of an apology.

-------

Aden's waiting for me outside the classroom. "You know I was thinking..." I roll my eyes as Aden follows me to my locker.

"Does your head hurt?" I shrug with a smug look.

"Ha." He replies sarcastically. "Anyway, I was thinking about these secret admirer notes.. and well.. I'd be careful Mattie." It was strange, he seemed geniuingly concerned.

"Why?" I feined interest.

"Because, a secret admirer's just a stalker with stationary. Everyone knows that. First it's little notes... then wham! He's got you locked in the boot of his car!" Aden stated almost matter of factly.

"Oh is that fact?" I ask with a smile on my face, it was nice to see him so concerned for me. All we'd ever done in the past was trade insults.

"One hunderd percent." He speaks with all seriousness and follows up with a small nod, before disappearing into the growing crowd.

-------

Later that evening, we're all round mine watching a movie.

"Mattie... what's this?" Cassie asks as she comes out of my room with a piece of paper. I know immediately what she's holding, my face goes almost as white as a ghost as Drew takes it out of her hand.

"I would move the heavens, just to spend a lifetime in your presence,

I'd sleep a dreamless sleep if you were mine,

But for now all I have is dreams of you and I,

If only reality was but a dream and a dream was but reality,

I'd be forever in the debt of he deity that made it happen,

But for now I'll have to settle;

With speaking once you have passed by,

With lingering looks,

With wondering thoughts,

And with dreams of angels and lovers.

Goodnight my princess."

As soon as Drew had finished reading the last word, all eyes were on me. All eyes except Ric's that was. I swallow hard.

"Where did you find it?" I ask quietly.

"On your pillow. I'm pretty sure, Ric's reaction confirming, he didn't write it." Cassie explains, as Drew passes me the note.

"I think you should tell them." Aden encourages, I close my eyes tightly, I know they're all looking at him with accusation in his eyes now, taking in a deep breath I sigh before explaining to my friends about my secret admirer.

I've given them all I know, I've shown them all the notes, I've told them everything. Ric still can't look at me. I watch as he walks to the kitchen, I follow him.

"Ric-"

"Don't try and make excuses Matilda." My heart sinks to my stomach at his use of my full name.

"I'm not. I didn't tell you because I didn't think it mattered. It was just a stupid teenage boy with a stupid little crush, I was brushing it off. But now I'm scared and I need you."

"Clearly you have something to hide, otherwise you would have told me more or less straight away." His voice raising slightly.

"This thing is tearing us apart in such a small time, don't you think that's what this guy wants. Don't give him what he wants." My eyes beginning to tear up.

"Guys I think recognise this hand writing. But you're not going to like it." Belle calls from the other room.

"Who is it?" Ric and I speak in unison.

"It kinda looks like it's..." Just as Belle is about to unveil the culprit, the door swings open and Lucas walks in. My newly aquired step-brother.

He looks at me, then my friends then the notes that are on the table. His eyes widen. He opens his mouth to say something, but closes it quickly again, he looks pale and guilty. That's when it hits us.

"You sent her those notes!" Ric yells across the room angrily. Of course why didn't I realise it. Before I knew it Ric was storming across the room and Lucas, fearing for his life, and run into the annex and locked himself in.

Making my way to the door, I force Ric to stop with the hatefilled ramblings at Lucas through the door.

"Luc..."

"I didn't mean for it to go this far." He calla through the door. It takes me ten minutes to convince him to come out of the room. While Ric stands on the otherside of the room, eyeing him carefully, I ask him to explain himself.

"It was an english and social studies experiment rolled into one. I thought I could knock two nails on the head in one go. I had to write a serious of love poems for English. And for Social Studies I had to monitor a chain of events, and I didn't think starting a rumour was very me."

"So the notes weren't actually written about her?" Drew asks what everyone else is thinking.

"No." I can feel the tension pour out of the room, Ric's stance loosens.

"Okay, well please don't use us as your social experiment again please Luc." I ask with pleading eyes. He nods before leaving the room.

Now all that was figured out, I had to find a way to try and get me and Ric back on track, he was still avoiding eye contact with me. But that... that is a story for another day.

[adellejefferiesxox]

Number one – I liked the way a secret valentine substituted a secret admirer. You could tell Aden was lost and wasn’t sure how to show how he felt. But in the end we got a happy ending. Good writing.

Number two - I felt it was a little rushed and the characters were pushed together too quickly at the end. But overall, it was a sweet story. The letters were nice to read. I liked that idea. You could see the character was struggling with their feelings.

Number three – Needed a bit more description, but the girls squealing over the secret admirer was really cute to read. It was a good story; I liked the Ruby/Nicole interaction. The way you wrote the feelings of the girls was realistic, I could get inside their heads and imagine the scene.

Number four – Awww I just loved this one. It was written really well, detailed. Even those the confession happened quickly I felt it happened smoothly and not out of the blue. It had a surprising result at the end of the story, but a ending I totally agree with.

Number five – It was short and sweet. Good story. I liked the description at the beginning .

Number six – Another well written story. A different combination of characters for this story was refreshing. I liked how you brought back a former character from home and away.

~ Overall, it was a difficult decision all the entries were written to a high standard. I vote for entry 4.

[TelephotoMarigold]

I vote for Number 3

Tele

[Red Ranger 1]

Entry #1 had a nice romantic atmosphere to it but while the characterisation of Aden was consistent, some of Belle’s actions didn’t ring quite as true.I wasn’t entirely convinced that she would agree to meet someone she didn’t know or that Irene would be happy with her doing so and her change from apparently being disappointed it was Aden to admitting she had feelings for him seemed a bit abrupt.It might have been better if there was more of a suggestion that she wanted Aden to be her admirer but wasn’t sure if he was serious or not.

Entry #2 had some nice comedy moments, such as the various attempts at writing the love letter.Although I realise it was the point of the story, an unknown narrator can be something of a double-edged sword, since it makes the story hard to visualise.The ending, with Aden’s admirer turning out to be Geoff, was a genuine surprise since it hadn’t actually occurred to me.

Entry #3 did a good job of showing Ruby’s mixed thoughts about her admirer, part pleased and part worried that he’d turn out to be a weirdo.I liked the interaction between her and Nicole and their plan.The double-bluff revelation was nicely done, at first it appears Geoff is Ruby’s admirer, which several people were probably expecting, then it turns out to be Romeo.My only fault with the story is that in places it didn’t flow as well as it might have done and it just seemed to peter out a bit.

Entry #4 made a good use of the first person narrative, spending the first part focusing on Angelo’s thoughts and giving a decent idea of what he’d been up to and where he was at with his life.His single-mindedness in telling Charlie how he felt was nicely portrayed.Unfortunately, I found the ending a bit abrupt.Unresolved endings are very hard to do;if you don’t include enough clues to let the reader come to their own conclusion about what might happen, it can feel incomplete.

Entry #5 flowed very well.Roman’s feelings were nicely demonstrated as a mixture of bemusement and curiosity.Again, there was a nice double-bluff ending with the revelation that Leah was Roman’s secret admirer and then that they’d both been set up by Colleen and Irene.The ending managed to be simultaneously funny, surprising and quite touching.

Entry #6 handled a large group of characters very well.I especially liked the interaction between Matilda and Aden, the relationship can be hard to capture because they spent very little time together but here it came across perfectly.The revelation that Lucas was behind the letters but wasn’t really after Matilda, he was only interested in the reaction, was a clever idea and the way that Matilda’s future with Ric was left open-ended worked well.

So, I hope everyone found that constructive and I’m casting my vote for Entry #5.