JosieTash Posted June 18, 2011 Report Posted June 18, 2011 COOOOL that Leah & Miles are married, AND how childlike Miles is …. Oi, leave those alone, they are for tonight” I said. “I know Mum but I’m hungry now” VJ complained. “Mmmm these look yummy” Miles tried to grab one. “Oi, I just stopped VJ from getting one. You’re just as bad as him” I said. “But I’m hungry now” he insisted.
lozlovesh&a Posted June 21, 2011 Report Posted June 21, 2011 Okay, I'm just not really sure where this is going..... so. Chapter Five – Roo. “Hi Aunty Morag” I said entering the house she shares with Miles, Leah, VJ, Romeo, Nicole & Dad. “Hi darling” she said. “How are you?” “I’m good. You?” I asked. “Yeah good” she said. “Oh the stupid phone” I grumbled. I ignored the message. “Oh there’s mail for you” “Thanks” I replied reading the postcard. I frowned. “Bad news?” she asked. “I don’t know. Just this friend from America” I said. “A Boy friend?” she asked. “No. Girl” I replied. “Oh okay. Well the others are having dinner in there so did you want to do something?” she asked. “Yeah come to my house. Liam is away with Bianca so I’ve got it to myself for now” I said. As we were walking towards my house we ran into a familiar face. “Hi Aunty Colleen” I said. “Hi Ruth, Morag. Where are you off to?” she asked being nosey as usual. “Roo’s house” Morag answered. “What are you doing?” I asked. “Well I was going out with Madge Wilkins but she cancelled on me” she answered. “Oh. That’s too bad” I said. “Yeah it is” she said. I sighed. “I guess you could come with us” I said. “Oh thanks pet. It will be nice to have dinner with my sister and neice” she said. I smiled. “Yeah so let’s go” We walked in the door and the phone started to ring. “You guys sit down I’ll just get this. Hello?” I answered. “Hold on. You’re where? Well do you need a lift? No I’m not living there any more. Come to my new address I suppose. Okay bye” I sighed. “Was that your girlfriend from America?” Morag asked. “Yes. Aparantly she is here” “Why is that bad?” Colleen asked. “Well it’s not really its just that sometimes she can be a lot to handle” “Right” Colleen said. “So shall we order a couple of pizza’s?” I asked. “Sure” Morag replied. The pizzas arrived about 15 minutes later and we sat down to eat. I had eaten a couple of slices when there was a knock on the door. I opened the door. “Hello stranger” Laura greeted me. “Hey yourself” I replied. “So can I come in?” she asked. “Oh right yeah sure come in” I replied. Laura frowned. “Are you not happy to see me? I know you’ve been ignoring my calls and texts” “Yeah I know sorry been busy” I said. “Okay well I got cleaned out too” she said. “Oh. You did?” I asked. “Yeah, not by Tim. By Brad. I’m pretty much broke” “Oh I’m sorry to hear that” I said. “So I was going to book a place to stay, do you know where I could stay?” I sighed. “I can’t have you staying anywhere. Just stay here okay? There is a spare room” I said. “Great thanks” she said. “Um hi” Morag said. “Oh right sorry. These are my aunts. Morag & Colleen” I said. “Hi nice to meet you. I’m Laura” she said. “Oh yum pizza. Mind if I have some?” she picked up a slice. “Go for it” I said.
Miranda Posted June 21, 2011 Report Posted June 21, 2011 I bet it'll all become clear Loz. Red Ranger is good at these intertwining fics, so is Perry, they would have ideas Anyway, I really love your writing in the first person, well done A classic plot for a story is a stranger comes to town and stirs things up for the residents. Just sayin.
Zetti Posted June 21, 2011 Report Posted June 21, 2011 Ah I wouldn't worry about not knowing what direction it is going in. I don't think at first when I used to write. This chapter was very good & I love the fact that it is in first person. Well done and looking forward to more
HighwayUnicorn Posted June 21, 2011 Report Posted June 21, 2011 Great interaction in that update. & as for the direction in which you are taking this fic, I wouldn't worry about it. Just write whatever comes to your mind. You'll eventually know where to put a twist, where to end, etc. I look forward to more. Love Carina xxx
lozlovesh&a Posted June 22, 2011 Report Posted June 22, 2011 Hmmm.... thanks for the suggestion guys! I'll have to have a think....... I've got one more chapter ready... but I won't put it up till a bit later.
JosieTash Posted June 22, 2011 Report Posted June 22, 2011 LOVE that you've got Laura in this fic !!!!!
lozlovesh&a Posted June 24, 2011 Report Posted June 24, 2011 Chapter 6 – Irene. “Lilly, April come on your going to be late for School” I called to the teens that were staying at my house. I love having people stay over. I love taking care of people. It’s what I do. Lilly is my foster sons daughter but he is in jail at the moment and her mum is coming down from Queensland soon, she just has to take care of a few things first. April is Bianca’s younger sister. Bianca is also staying with me but she is away with her new boyfriend Liam. “Coming Irene” April called. “Have you heard from your sister girlie?” I asked April. “Yeah I spoke to her last night. She’s having the best time. I am so happy for her” April replied. “Good. Me too” I said. “Morning Lil” “Morning Irene” Lilly said. “Hello” Ruby and VJ arrived at the door. “Hey” April grinned. VJ walked in and gave Lilly a kiss. “Hi VJ” she smiled. “Aw you two are cute” I said. “Irene” Lilly was annoyed. “What have I said something wrong?” I asked smiling. “No don’t worry” Lilly replied. I walked into work. “Sorry guys, running a bit late this morning, Lilly & April were taking their time” I said to Leah & Indi. “That’s okay don’t worry about it” Leah replied. “Yeah it’s been a bit slow today for some reason” Indi added. “Surprise” Bianca walked into the kitchen. “Well welcome home girlie” I hugged her. “Hi Irene” she smiled at me. “How was your trip?” I asked. “Mmmm magical” she said. “I’m not sure I want to know all the details” I said. “Wasn’t going to tell you all the details” she said. “I want to know all the details” Leah said “Oh really? Well maybe i’ll tell them and maybe I won’t” Bianca said. “Scott, that’s not fair” Leah replied. Bianca grinned. “Well that’s life sometimes” she said. “Bianca” Leah groaned. “Clearly you are happy and I want to hear all about it” “Chill Leah. I will tell you later I promise. I just came to get some vanilla milkshakes. Liam’s out front waiting for me” Bianca said. “So Bianca are you still going to live with me?” I asked. “Yeah of course. I may be in love with Liam but I’m not ready to move in with him yet. Though we may be having sleepovers” she said. “Oh if that’s okay of course” she added. “It’s okay darl” I said. “Okay cool” she grinned. “Thanks for the shakes. I’ll see you later Leah” “Lunch here” Leah said. “Yup. Bye guys” Bianca said. “Bye” I replied. “I am so glad she’s happy now” Leah said as soon as she left. “Yeah me too” I replied.
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.