Returns

[Zetti]

Chapter Nine

Martha took a deep breath and started ‘This started when we were in New York, you had just got a new job as a detective of the Narcotics unit and I was lonely.’

She felt Jack’s body tense but he made no comment and just waited so she carried on talking.

‘I joined the local salsa dancing class so I had something to do, at first I went on my own and practiced with whoever was there. I became friends with a few people there, when you went to Seattle for an undercover job, one of the girls asked me to go out with them on a Friday night.’

She looked at him trying to gauge his reaction but he had clearly schooled his facial features to look neutral and not betraying any reaction he might have.

‘We were in a club, and then after a while, it got boring so we ended up in a casino.’

‘What happened next?’

‘It became a normal Friday night, to go out for drinks and then to a casino. I ended on the slot machines.’

‘How much?’

Martha frowned and asked ‘What do you mean?’

‘How much did you lose?’

‘At first it was only $10 here and there.’ She spoke quietly and then looked at him ‘I ended up losing about $5000 in 6 months.’

She felt him move and stand up, she watched as he pushed his hand through his hair and had anger etched into his features, she could feel the anger emanating from him.

‘I never noticed.’

‘I only ever used my own money, never touched yours.’ She admitted feeling embarrassed and ashamed of herself.

‘So what happened to make you breakdown earlier?’

‘Well I had no money left but I had the urge to carry on gambling so I went to a loan shark.’

She heard a sharp intake of breath and watched as Jack’s face paled. She approached him but he moved away.

‘Don’t,’

‘I ended up borrowing about $10000 to carry on gambling, I ended up with my new job and I slowly paid it back, by gambling and then winning. I was on a winning streak and had nearly all of the money ready to pay back but then…’

‘You lost it all.’

‘Yes, I didn’t know what to do.’

‘What about talking to me?’

She heard the scathing tone of voice and cringed inwardly. She never wanted to hurt him, ever.

‘About two months later, after I had paid back some, the loan shark told me that someone had taken my debt and that I would have to pay him instead. That is when I pawned the engagement ring.’

‘My mum’s ring? You told me that you’d been mugged!’

Martha saw Jack’s face look ashen and tears began to fall again, she felt like he had pushed a knife into her heart and was twisting it.

‘I was desperate. I didn’t know what else to do.’ She begged him to listen but he pulled away from her and just stood at the edge of the kitchen near the door to the conservatory, she didn’t know what else to say.

‘The loan shark did his best to get money from me.’

‘Why?’

‘I don’t know, he sent a goon after me to threaten me. That same man is in the Bay.’

‘What? Is that why you were crying?’

‘Sort of, it is linked to him. He told me he was my twin.’

‘None of this makes any sense.’ She heard him speak the words that she had been thinking all that time.

‘I know.’

‘You need to leave.’

‘Jack please’ she walked towards him but he put his hands out to stop her ‘I never meant to hide it, but the longer I did, the easier it was.’

‘Please go. Get your things and go.’

Martha was going to reason with him but the look on his face made it clear that there was no point so she went up the stairs and crossed the landing into their room. She blinked her eyes as she tried to stop the tears again. She pulled a small suitcase out from the closet and packed it with the essentials. She did it as slow as possible in the hope that Jack might stop her but after a while, she knew that he wouldn’t. She picked the case up and pulled her coat from the closet door. Martha exited the room and made her way down the stairs, she spotted Jack at the sofa once she had got to the bottom of the stairs.

‘Jack..’

She saw him stiffen as he turned to look at her. ‘Just go, I can’t look at you right now.’

Martha nodded as he turned away from her and watched him walk into the kitchen and out of her sight. She opened the door to see the rain pouring and the clouds getting darker..

**

[Zetti]

Apologies for the long delay, life was pretty hectic in June and its finally starting to calm down, this is a small chapter just to get me back into the flow of the story, hopefully the next update won't take as long. Thanks for being so patient with me! Enjoy

Chapter Ten

The cold air hit Jack squarely in the face as he walked out of his house the following morning; his eyes had dark circles underneath them to indicate his lack of sleep. The grey tinted sunglasses hid his dark circles as he strode out to his car and opened it.

He sat in the driver seat but didn’t move to turn his car on. He put his hand on the steering wheel trying to encourage himself to start the engine and make the morning commute to work. He glanced at the dashboard in front of him as he turned on the engine and checked the time.

I have time to go to the diner and get some coffee! I need caffeine in my system.

He made the journey to the diner car park and turned the engine off, he put his head in his hands and sighed, it was going to be a long day for him.

‘Hey darl, what can I get you?’ Irene asked as he walked to the counter in the diner, he smiled and asked for a double espresso.

‘That bad?’

‘Just one of those mornings.’

Irene nodded knowingly and winked at him. A few moments passed with Jack confused as to why she winked at him but then he realised that she had assumed that he had kept Martha awake all night.

How ironic, she is the reason I couldn’t sleep but not because of that! Sometimes I wish I had never come back. This town had done nothing but cause me hassle. My life in New York was less stress than this one!

‘Want anything else?’ Irene asked as she handed the coffee over to him and accepting the note in his hand.

‘Not right now, work beckons.’

‘Have a nice day then darl.’ She handed the change over to him.

He nodded in acknowledgement and then walked out of the diner, to end up bumping into Roo.

‘Jack.’

‘Roo.’

‘Is Martha at home?’

Jack’s defenses went up, he might be mad at her for all the lies and trouble that was going on because of her inability to talk to him but he wasn’t about to let Roo hurt her more either.

‘Why do you want to know?’ he asked as he walked to the side of the diner to let the customers waiting in front of him to pass.

‘I need to talk to her.’

‘Why?’

‘There are things I need to explain.’

‘You’ve turned her whole world upside down, she’s not going to talk to you and I’m glad because you don’t deserve her at all.’

‘Please just tell her I need to talk to her.’

‘No.’ Jack stated firmly causing Roo to stop dead in her tracks as she was pacing around.

‘Please.’

‘She doesn’t deserve to be hurt again, she needs peace and time away from you. You’re not good for her.’

‘You cant stop her talking to me.

Jack noticed a hint of petulance in her voice but it didn’t faze him. He was angry at Martha, but not angry enough to put her in a situation with her mother.

I cant stay angry at her forever, she’s my life, my rock and the one person I will always love. She’s it for me.

**

Jack walked into the police station with his phone in one hand and a coffee in the other. Coffee made the world go around in his opinion, without coffee he would not be able to function. Sidestepping the constables wrestling a prisoner who was trying to evade the officers, he managed to get into his office. He looked at the desk, which had yet more paperwork added.

I didn’t get into policing to sit at a desk all day and fill in paperwork. Policing used to be about catching the bad guys but now all I do is paperwork all the time.

Collapsing into his chair, he took a big gulp of coffee not caring that it was burning up his throat as it passed through his gullet, he just needed to get through the day.

Technically I’m the boss so I can just take the day off. I think my life has to come first right now.

‘Dectetive Holden?’

‘Yes?’

‘You asked to see me first thing?’

‘Oh yes.’ Jack remembered the phone call from the previous night.

‘I’m taking this paperwork home, so call in the other dectetives and only call me if its urgent.’

‘Sure, no problem, will you be in tomorrow?’

‘I will let you know when I’m back.’ He told her and then dismissed her. He picked up the paperwork with the intention of dumping it at home and dealing with it later. He needed some relaxation time.

Life is getting way too complicated. Some time to myself to figure out where my head is, is the best thing for me right now.

**

[Zetti]

Chapter Eleven

Everything happens for a reason so just buckle up and enjoy the ride…

Jack chuckled as he saw the sign on the bench as he sat down with another coffee and his paperwork. It was early evening judging by the fact that the sun was slowly but gradually setting.

He ran his fingers across the file cover and took a sip of his coffee. He sighed as he watched some people walk across the beach with their dog exploring ahead of them. The rustle of paperwork caused him to look down and grimace.

Paperwork is a necessary evil. I can’t be bothered with paperwork but it is a necessary evil at the moment, the quicker I get it done, the better. Seriously police work shouldn’t be paperwork, I didn’t join the force to be stuck doing paperwork. So changes might almost definitely be necessary.

Jack shook his head to rid himself of the daydream and focused on the paperwork in his lap. Once he had immersed himself in the paperwork, the time flew and before he knew it, the sun had set leaving a dark glossy backdrop against the water. Jack looked out over it and smiled at the scene that Martha would have truly appreciated. She loved natural scenes and moments that took her breath away.

I need to stop bringing her into everything, what is important now is that I get home and get some food into me, beer and a burger sounds like the perfect meal. The rest of the paperwork can wait for tomorrow, I have a date with my TV tonight. Hark at me sounding like a bachelor when in actual fact I am married.

Jack stood up and binned his long since empty coffee cup and picked up all his paperwork, making sure they were in order of how he had organised them. They were organized by the crime committed and the actions required, it might not make sense to anyone else but it was a system that worked for Jack.

The car journey was accompanied by rain and out of nowhere, he saw a flash of light. He slowed down only to find a female at the side of the road drenched through and looking really fed up.

‘Need a lift somewhere?’

The first thing that Jack noticed was her lack of trust for him so he pulled out his badge and showed it to her.

‘I’m a detective.’

However he realised she still didn’t trust him as she edged away even more. He then pulled his phone out and gave it to her.

‘Ring anyone you want and tell them where you are so if they don’t hear from you then to find me.’ He rattled off his address.

She’s smiling, that has to be a good sign I guess. She really does have pretty eyes.

‘Thanks. I just got lost and have no idea where I am now.’

‘Where were you going?’ he asked as she got into the car tugging her backpack with her. Jack noticed her pulling her backpack to her chest and hugging it as if it was her lifejacket.

‘Anywhere.’

‘Are you okay?’

‘I’m fine.’

Yeah the look of pure fear in her eyes tells me different. Something has happened to her as her defenses are up. I will have to tread carefully with her.

‘Is there anything you want or a place you want me to drop you off at?’

‘Is there anywhere I can just get a bed for a few nights until I decide what is next for me?’

‘Of course, there is the caravan park or the Sands hotel?’

‘Hotel please, a hot shower and a bed sounds perfect right now.’ Came her tired response.

Jack carried on driving and noticed she was really cold so he turned the heat up so that her feet would warm up until they arrived at the hotel.

The journey took longer than expected, it should have only taken 10 minutes but a traffic accident caused him to have double back and make the longer car ride which meant the entire journey took over 40 minutes.

‘Sorry about that, it was only supposed to take 10 minutes.’

‘No problem, not your fault, here you go.’

Jack took his phone from her, he’d forgotten that she had it.

‘Come on, I will make sure you get in safely.’

‘No need’ came her low voice ‘I will be okay.’

‘I know but I wont until I know you are safe in the hotel room. So let me do this please?’

Her only response was to nod her head.

I must be insane but he seems so nice but the ring on his finger tells me he’s off-limits. Shame because he’s really good looking!

‘Come on then.’ He gestured for her to lead the way to the reception area of the hotel.

‘Hello how can I help?’

Jack responded for her, ‘A double room please.’

‘For two?’

‘No for one’ Jack answered as she nodded away and typed something into her computer.

Jack watched as they sorted out the details and finding out that her name was Hazel.

‘How long is your stay?’

‘A few days but might be longer.’

‘No problem. Your room is 314.’

‘Thank you.’

Jack walked her to the stairs before she stopped him. ‘I’ll be fine from here, thank you so much for the help, I appreciate it.’

‘No problem.’

He watched her as she walked up the stairs, turning around to talk to him.

‘What’s your name again?’

‘Jack. Jack Holden.’

‘Thank you for the help.’

‘Anytime.’

She smiled and then made her way up the next flight of stairs. Jack turned with a grin on his face but he was unaware of someone watching him. He strolled up to the receptionist and paid her for a week stay so that Hazel didn’t have to worry.

Well that is a load off my mind, a few days to get my bearings again and then I can get myself back to work.

**

[Zetti]

Chapter Twelve

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that he was here with another woman, I really must have hurt him more than I realised. How do I fix this? Can I fix this? His face when I told him the truth about the ring belonging to mother broke my heart. I really have hurt him so badly!

The hotel room looked blank despite the upmarket décor that filled the room, Martha sighed as she threw her phone onto the bed and slipped off her shoes. She moved into the bathroom just off her hotel room and ran herself a bath. A nice hot bath might help her feel a bit better. Once the water was filling the bath, she went and plugged her phone into the phone charger, she checked if there were any messages but there was nothing. She found it difficult to avoid texting Jack.

There’s nothing I can say to make it any better or to unhurt his feelings. He’s my life, my man (I hope) and my rock! I need a way to make this better again, to heal some of the pain he must be going through right now, how stupid was I? Maybe this hot bath will help me feel a tiny bit better so I can formulate a plan.

She walked across the carpet reveling in the soft feeling of it vowing to herself that If she ever got a chance to go home, she would change all the carpets to suit her taste in a bid to really make it her own. She stopped the water as she re entered the bathroom and took her clothes off slinging them in a corner of the bathroom.

‘Ah perfect’ she sighed as she stepped into the bath and enjoyed the luxurious feeling of the water over her entire body.

It is amazing how the water can make your whole body just relax, the swirl of the clear blue liquid that almost has healing powers to make your body relax and drift off to a peaceful and tranquil place. I need to talk to him, a phone call cant hurt can it?

A phone call wont harm will it? Will he want to talk to me? Is he with that woman? I’ve never seen her before so maybe it was just someone he is looking after through his job? Has he really just replaced me that quickly.

**

Jack found himself on the sofa watching a cookery show, not that he had any interest in it.

Hazel was definitely going through a tough time, I cant help but wonder why. Is she on the run? Abusive partner or parents? Runaway? I need to find out. I haven’t got much to go on though. I only know her first name. Hazel. Nice name, suits her and matches her eyes, duh that is probably why she was named that.

I need some sleep, maybe a fresh start tomorrow will help me work out what it is I need to do next.

He jumped as his phone rang; he pulled it out of his jacket lying on the arm rest and sighed as he saw it was Martha.

I have to talk to her at some point, we cannot carry on like this.

**

Martha sat up in the bed and picked up her phone, which was charging next to her. She dialled for Jack and crossed her fingers in the hope that he would pick up.

It’s late but hopefully he will be able to answer me and talk to me, Please let him talk to me.

‘Hey.’

The one word answer made Martha’s heart blossom with a small spark of hope that her marriage might not be over.

‘Can we meet tomorrow?’ Martha asked

‘Tomorrow evening?’ he asked after a long pause, his voice sounded so far away to Martha.

‘Sure what time?’

‘5.30?’

Martha smiled despite the fact that Jack had made no indication that he wanted to fix things but the simple fact that he answered gave her hope.

‘I will see you then, oh and Jack.’

‘Yeah?’

‘I’m sorry for everything.’

‘See you tomorrow.’

‘See you then.’

Martha lay back on the bed and allowed herself to feel more hope that maybe she hadn’t completely messed up.

**

[Zetti]

Chapter Thirteen

The restaurant that had been renamed from Angelo’s to Brax’s was pretty quiet that Tuesday afternoon. Martha found herself waiting for Jack to turn up.

I hope he does turn up, so that I can hopefully fix the mess I made. I want a chance to prove that I truly am sorry for my actions. He can’t hate me anymore than I actually hate myself. I just need a chance to prove it and I am sure we will be okay, right? I hope so.

‘Want a drink?’ the waiter asked shaking Martha out of her daydream.

‘Yes, I’ll have a club soda please.’

‘Of course, anything else?’

‘No that’s it for now, thanks’

‘No problem, will be right over with your drink.’

Martha smiled and then looked over at the door to the restaurant but was disappointed to see that it was empty. Her hopes deflated as Jack was now over 40 minutes later.

Looks like he isn’t coming. I should be angry at him but I can’t be because it is all my fault. If I hadn’t hurt him then we’d be fine. I miss him but what can I do?

Martha looked at her phone but it was blank, no text, no phone calls, not even a single app notification which normally drove her insane, just absolutely nothing, nada.

‘Here you go, are you wanting to order some food?’

‘No thank you, just the bill please.’ She said trying to smile but feeling like her heart was breaking.

‘Of course. Be right back.’

Martha could only manage a terse nod as she put her phone in her pocket and stood up to walk to the bar so she could pay.

I shouldn’t be so upset, this is my fault. My stupid actions led to this, led to our marriage falling apart. He must truly hate me to get my hopes up and then stand me up at the last minute. He’s probably given up on our marriage and there is literally nothing I can actually do about it.

She paid her bill and then made her way of the restaurant, walking down the stairs and out of the surf club. The beach was deserted so she decided to take a walk down there. It was the perfect opportunity for her to be alone with her thoughts.

**

Hazel adjusted her skirt and checked her reflection in her portable mirror before she placed it back in her bag and slung it over her shoulder. The beach looked absolutely beautiful so she pulled out her camera and started to take some landscape photos. She spotted a large seagull picking at some discarded food, she didn’t want to disturb it so she played with the zoom on her camera and took some intimate shots. There was something about nature that she loved.

A perfect moment to capture the beauty of nature and the intricate wonders of the world. I sound so corny but I do love nature.

‘Excuse me?’

Hazel spun around and came face to face with another lady, she didn’t recognise her but from the first glance and the fisted hand, she clearly wasn’t happy.

‘Yes?’

‘You were at the Sands hotel last night.’

Who the **** is she? How does she know I was at the hotel?

‘Who are you?’ choosing to phrase her words carefully.

‘I’m the wife of the man you were with.’

‘The police officer?’

‘That’s the one.’

Hazel blinked at her short and rude tone of voice but then realised she didn’t really know who she was so she couldn’t blame her for the rude attitude.

‘Sorry, he was helping me when I got stuck.’

‘Stay away from him.’

Hazel nodded as she watched the lady walk away with her hair swaying in the breeze. Her thoughts turned to the night before.

He was very nice but definitely bad news if that is how his wife acted. Shame, he was quite good looking and his eyes were mesmerising. I cant think like this, he’s married! I need a distraction!

**

[Zetti]

Chapter Fourteen

Jack stretched his arms as his eyes fluttered open. He moved his hand to the side to check his phone expecting it to be 11am; he only closed his eyes for a few minutes. He pressed the power button on the side of the phone and sprung off the sofa when he saw the time was 13.04.

He unlocked his phone and dialed Martha’s number. He had completely lost track of time.

I didn’t mean to sleep that long, it was meant to be a 15 minute power nap and it turns out to be 3 hours! Crap, crap, crap! Come on Martha answer the phone!

‘Hello. I cannot answer at this moment in time, please call again.’ Came the voicemail as Jack swore under his breath and found his keys. He was going to have to go and find her.

‘Dammit.’ He muttered under his breath as he walked to his car but instead he found himself bumping into another human being.

‘Sorry.’ Came his automatic response as he looked up and saw a blonde haired man in front of him. ‘Lucas?’

‘Hey bro! Heard you were back.’

‘Yeah came back a while ago.’

‘Where’s Martha? I thought we could all go and find the diner for some lunch?’

Jack winced as he thought of lunch and how he had let her down. He sighed and put his hand through his dark brown hair.

‘Uh oh, what did you do?’

‘It’s a long story, I need to find her so I can talk to her.’ He took his key off the key ring and gave it to Lucas.

‘That’s my spare key, let yourself in, and I will be back later.’ He said hurriedly as he tried to scramble his brain into thinking coherently enough. That brain process would help him find Martha and try to sort out this whole situation.

He dialled Martha again and got her voicemail yet again. He groaned in frustration as he got into his car and started it.

Where would she be? She wouldn’t go to the caravan park because of Roo but where else would she actually go?

His phone rang halting his daydream as he answered it without checking who was actually ringing him.

‘Martha?’

‘Jack?’

‘Who are you?’

‘It’s roo.’

‘What the **** do you want?’ he swore at her

‘I just saw Martha on the cliff top. You know the one I am talking about, looking destroyed. She wont want to talk to me, maybe you should go and see her.’

Jack hung up the phone and got out of there sharply. He had to go and find his wife. They had to talk this through and find a way past it all.

**

Martha sat on the cliff near the memorial for Belle; it was a quiet area now where very few people ever came which was good for her. People wouldn’t have to witness her breakdown. This mess up was her own fault. If she had been good enough then she wouldn’t have gone on the wrong path or at least been completely honest with Jack. Lies have the power to ruin a relationship but only if you are not honest about them in the end.

I left it too late. Jack would have forgiven me if I hadn’t pawned off my engagement ring. The ring that belonged to his deceased mother. The ring that he had kept with him till the day he asked me to marry him. I shouldn’t have done it. I know I am not perfect but my heart yearns to be in his arms again. If only I could just turn back the clock and tell him I need help, maybe it would have never gotten that far. All the lies just ruined our friendship, our relationship and our marriage. I lost my best friend, my man, my lover, and my soul mate.

‘Martha?’ she heard a voice filter through all the recriminations she was inwardly berating herself for.

She looked up blinking through the tears that were streaming down her face.

I must be seeing things. Is that really Jack?

‘This is where we shared one of those first few moments, do you remember?’

‘Yeah, not something I will forget. It meant the world to me. It always has and always will.’ Martha spoke and kept eye contact with him till he sat next to her and she jerked her gaze away from his.

‘Why?’

‘Why does it mean the world to me?’

‘Not that, why did you do it? Why did you hide it from me?’

She looked him in the eyes and swallowed the lump in her throat. She had to choose her words carefully because she didn’t want to hurt Jack any further.

‘I didn’t know what to do. I know that I should have told you, but it was so easy to say to myself that I’d tell you another time, to delay the inevitable.’ She paused and then breathed in before carrying on. ‘I spent so long trying to find a way to tell you but without the disappointment in your eyes.’

‘So if your twin hadn’t turned up, would you have ever told me?’

She shook her head. ‘I don’t think so, its like I didn’t know how to tell you and the longer I went without telling you, the easier it became for me to keep it to myself.’

‘Have you spoken to him since?’

‘My brother you mean?’

‘Yes.’

‘No. I just felt alone. I wanted to fix this between us. I got jealous.’

‘Jealous of what?’

‘I saw you at the Sands hotel.’

Martha watched as the realisation dawned on him. ‘She was stuck, and needed a lift. That’s all.’

‘I know that now, but I did confront her after you didn’t turn up.’

‘What? Where?’

‘Does it matter? I am sorry; I just don’t know what to do. I hurt you but I can’t change the past. I just want to try and fix this.’ She muttered as the tears she had been holding in for a few moments fell once again.

She felt him shift and then his arms pulling her into his lap. She cried her tears as he rocked her back and forwards.

‘What does this mean for us?’ she hiccupped through the tears.

‘You come home and we work through this together. Just make me a promise?’

‘Anything.’

‘Tell me everything, and don’t lie to me again.’

Martha nodded as she snuggled back into his chest and nodded feeling a semblance of peace wash over her.

‘Good, now lets go home?’

‘Home yeah, sounds perfect.’

**

[Zetti]

Chapter Fifteen

‘I’ve missed this, just holding each other and being close. It feels like a lifetime.’ She breathed as she looked up at him. She saw his features soften and lean down for a kiss. She leant up and kissed him more deeply before she felt him pull away and sigh.

‘What is it?’ she asked concerned and trying to suppress the feelings of rejection.

‘We need to talk first so we get this all out in the open.’

‘Talk about what exactly?’

‘What you are going to do next?’

Martha frowned as she sat up and placed her legs under her facing him. She closed her eyes only to open then when Jack placed his hand on her cheek and rubbed his other hand along her jawline.

‘Your twin, I think you should talk to your mum.

Martha pulled away from him and stood up. She inhaled and exhaled before turning around to face him. She felt him pull her back onto the sofa causing her to snuggle into him.

‘It can wait.’

A voice came from behind her. ‘What can wait?’

‘What the-‘

Martha looked up to find Lucas stood at the bottom of the stairs and squealed. She jumped up and hugged him. ‘When did you get here?’

‘Earlier.’ She heard Jack answer for her. ‘Sorry I forgot to mention it.’

‘Nice bro, you forgot all about me, only took you 25 years.’

Martha stifled a giggle at the serious expression on Lucas’s face when she knew for a fact that he was only winding him up.

‘Oh shush! You know that is not what I meant!’ came the response as Martha giggled.

‘Coffee?’

‘Yes please!’

‘Milk and 2 sugars right?’

‘Yes, you know me too well, when you going to divorce my idiot brother and run away with me?’

Martha laughed as she heard Lucas go ‘ooft’ whilst subsequently hearing a soft thud against the carpet and some grunts. She deduced that they were having a wrestling match on the floor. She shook her head in silent laughter.

**

[Zetti]

Chapter Sixteen

‘Are you ready for this?’ Martha heard Jack ask yet again which didn’t help her nerves settle at all. She ran her clammy hands down her jeans and tried to calm herself down. She was about to come face to face with her twin yet again.

I have so many questions to ask. So many questions that I need the answer to. Am I even ready for this?

Martha felt Jack’s hand cover hers to stop the rubbing motion up and down her jeans.

‘Breathe. You’re not alone, I promise.’

‘I know, I couldn’t do this without you.’

‘Your strength comes from inside of you. Don’t forget that’ came his calming voice as Martha spotted ‘him’ walking down the length of the restaurant.

Martha couldn’t speak, just gripped his hands harder as her twin appeared at the table. Moments passed with no words, the tension eased as Jack cleared his throat and broke the seal of silence.

‘Thanks for agreeing to meet me.’

‘Sit down.’ Martha heard Jack say as she struggled to get her head and mouth to engage with each other.

I don’t even know what to say to him, what do you say to your twin that you knew nothing about? The twin that was terrorising me for money, what possible explanation is there?

‘Martha?’

‘Sorry, what?’ she faced Jack who looked concerned.

‘I was just going to get some drinks for us, the waiter will be here in a moment, what do you want?’

‘Water for me please.’

‘And you?’

‘Pint for me please.’

Martha looked her twin in the eye. ‘I just realised I don’t even know your name.’

‘Logan. I know that you don’t understand everything that happened.’

‘Too right I don’t.’ she said looking him squarely in the eyes, never losing eye contact even as their drinks were delivered.

‘Let me explain.’

‘Go on.’

‘I had no idea who you were when I was asking you for money, if I had known I would never have done it.’

‘Who told you to come after her?’

‘I used to work for a debt collection agency, my job was to..’

‘Yeah we get that part, who assigned you to my wife?’

Martha watched as Logan took a gulp of his drink. He was avoiding the question but she wasn’t bothered about the avoidance per se, more so the reason behind the avoidance.

Martha sighed as the waiter approached their table. They all placed their order, Martha opted for salmon, Jack and Logan both going for steaks, medium well and rare respectively.

‘I don’t know. I only worked there for a few months, one day I get an assignment, and I didn’t know who from. It was legitimate, the paperwork detailing all the information I needed was there, and it checked out.’

‘So if you were from a debt collection agency, why did you terrorise me? Why did you make me so so scared?’

‘I wasn’t planning on that I swear. It just got to a point where your debt got signed off onto a third party, that third party wanted me to go with them. They were going to pay me double and I needed the money desperately at that point.’ A pause ensued until Logan looked Martha in the eyes. ‘I had no choice but to do what they wanted.’

‘What did they have on you?’ Jack asked but was interrupted when their food turned up on the table.

‘I’m confused what you talking about?’ Martha looked at Logan and Jack. ‘What is going on?’

‘I have a daughter.’

‘Still not sure why that is relevant, apart from the fact that I am an auntie.’

‘She has cancer.’

‘What kind?’

‘Neuroblastoma.’

Martha saw the anguish in Logan’s eyes and knew without a shadow of a doubt that he was telling the truth, he didn’t act that way to hurt her, he did it because he had no choice in the matter. She reached over and placed her hand on his.

‘How is Roo involved?’

Logan sighed and placed his other hand on top of Martha’s, not wanting to let go of the connection however frail it was between the two twins.

‘You remember the third party?’

‘Yes.’

‘It was her. She wanted the money from you.’

‘Why?’ Martha asked pulling away from him and feeling like someone had just slapped her ten times.

‘I don’t know, I honestly don’t’

‘When did you find out that she was our mother?’

‘A few weeks after you moved back here.’

‘How?’ Martha heard Jack intervene.

‘She told me, she wanted me to stay away so she threatened me, she knew that if you found out then well you wouldn’t want anything to do with me. As I would always be the one who hurt and scared you.’

‘I don’t get it, she was paying you? What was the money for?’

‘To pay for the treatment for my daughter, there were experimental treatments that would help her.’

‘Would?’

‘She died, not long ago. The cancer got to her heart and she passed away.’

She watched as tears fell down Logan’s face. She stood up and knelt near his chair wiping the tears away.

‘I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you, that was never my intention, I promise.’ He spoke through the tears but Martha just nodded.

‘I know, I know, I get it now. It’s okay.’

‘Our mother could have paid for the treatment but she was so interested in getting the money from you, she kept refusing to help, I had to. My baby girl had to come first, she just had to.’

‘Shh. It’s okay, its not your fault. I don’t blame you anymore.’

**

[Zetti]

Chapter Seventeen

‘Where are you staying?’ Martha asked Logan as she walked him to his car with Jack opting to give them some much needed time together.

‘At the Sands for a while.’

‘Do you have enough to keep you going?’

‘Yes, I do, I will be fine.’ Logan said looking determined and exhibiting strength but Martha knew it was a front; he was very similar to her in that sense.

It was for that reason alone; she hadn’t asked him to stay with her because his pride wouldn’t have let him accept the offer.

‘Why don’t you just stay with us?’ she heard Jack ask from behind her.

‘No its okay I’ll be fine.’

‘I know but you two deserve to have some time together, you’ve spend 32 years apart, why waste more time?’

Martha swelled with admiration for Jack, this situation had been hard on him too but he had stayed the course and never once wavered in support for her.

‘He has a point,’ she heard Logan address her tapping one foot and then the other in a repetitive motion ‘I don’t want to intrude.’

‘You’re not’ Martha answered grasping his hand. ‘He’s right for once, we’ve wasted too much time.’

‘What about her?’ came his muttered response.

‘Her?’

‘Our ‘mother’.’

‘Lets not worry about her for now.’ Came Jack’s quick response in order to diffuse the tension that arose the moment Roo’s existence was mentioned.

The night had gone better than expected, neither of them needed to have that topic brought up. It would do more harm than good.

**

‘The whole thing is messed up.’ Jack commented as Martha flopped onto the bed dragging the covers over and snuggling up to him.

‘Tell me about it, I just feel for him. He did stupid things but for his daughter, my niece.’

Jack tightened his hold around her body. They had been trying to have a child for a while now but with no luck. It would be seriously bad timing if they did get pregnant now when Logan was still grieving for his daughter.

‘I cant believe she would do it this to either of you’ Jack sighed clearly showing his confusion at the way Roo had treated her own flesh and blood.

‘Oh I can. She’s selfish.’

Jack didn’t disagree but he didn’t voice his opinion either. He was on Martha’s side but as he knew all too well, there were two sides to every story. Somehow he got the feeling that this whole messed up situation was about to get even more messed up if that was even possible.

‘I had a twin all this time. The other part of my family that I never knew I had. She could have told me when I came back.’

Jack sighed watching Martha rant as he tuned out. He loved her but he couldn’t help but think that there was more to this situation than Martha was making out.

‘Are you listening?’

‘You’re selfish.’

‘What?’

‘You have a mother, someone who loves you and yes she hurt you. Do you know what I would give to have that?’ Jack asked as he pulled the covers off and stood up. ‘I lost my mum a long time ago, I will never see her smile. She never saw me graduate, become a police officer, marry you. She wont see her grandchildren, or watch them grow up.’

‘Jack..’

‘No, your mum made a mistake, I don’t know what she was thinking, but she was young when she had you, barely an adult herself, don’t you think that she was probably scared and alone? Having twins I imagine as a single parent is not easy. You talk about what she robbed from you, and I get it, but have you thought maybe it was not that easy for her either.’

‘Jack.’

‘I’m gonna go for a run.’

‘It’s late.’

‘I’m going for a run.’ He said yet again leaving Martha on her own and in shock, she knew she needed to have that conversation with her mother if she was to put this at rest and move on with her life.

**

[Zetti]

Authors Note: This is the last chapter but I may bring a sequel if people are interested

Chapter Eighteen

Roo entered the lounge area of her new house in a recently built new complex not far from the diner. As she looked around the newly furnished apartment with a smile, a knock on the door came.

‘Hang on.’ She called out as she went through the kitchen to the backdoor to grab her bag where her keys were situated. She navigated her way through the kitchen to the front door whilst fumbling around for her keys, which was not as easy as she initially thought it, would be.

She finally located her keys and allowed the door to swing open as she unlocked it. She looked into the eyes of her two children, both with stormy blue eyes and matching blank neutral expressions.

‘Can we come in?’

‘Of course’ she gestured to the sofa on her right and moved out of the day to allow them both to enter the room.

‘Do you want a drink?’

‘No, we just want answers.’

‘Sit down, and we can talk’ Roo spoke as she closed the door and moved to the opposite sofa so she could sit and talk to them both.

I can hardly believe that they are here, maybe this is finally my chance to talk to them both and make amends for the past.

‘Who is our father?’

She inhaled and exhaled as she prepared herself. ‘I was a rebellious teenager, and by the time I was about 16, I had gotten myself into a world of drugs, sex and gangs.’ She paused and took a breath before continuing ‘I got sucked in and treated like a queen. There was this guy who was the right hand man of the leader. He was a charmer, knew exactly what to say to make me all gooey for him.’

‘So you slept with him.’

‘Yeah, he was in my ideal 16 year old head the perfect guy. He made me want to do whatever he asked of me.’

‘So what? You fell in love with him, how does that lead to you putting us both up for adoption?’

‘I didn’t get pregnant until we had been sleeping together for about 5 months, it had gotten to a point where I wanted out of the gang but if you were in the gang, the only way you would get out is if you were dead.’

The room went eerily silent but neither Martha nor Logan spoke, they couldn’t speak without breaking the tension and risking Roo shutting down on them so they waited for Roo to carry on talking.

‘One day we were in his house and we were all drinking, I had made a rule to myself that I wouldn’t take drugs, it was not my scene but somehow I ended up drinking and drugs were involved. The next thing I knew he was.. well anyways to cut a long story short, he raped me.’

Logan spoke up. ‘So you decided to give us up?’

‘No, your father didn’t think he’d done anything wrong and I couldn’t escape, as soon as he realized I was pregnant, he was getting ready to be a dad. I naively thought that maybe he could be a good father and I could move on from what had happened.’

‘Okay so you ended up giving us away, what happened to him?’

Roo looked between them both. ‘He died in a car accident, I was with him, I was about 7 months at the time, and the shock caused me to go into early labour. The nurses did everything they could to stop you from being born so early but you were born early. Martha you were small but a fighter, you took a while to get to full health but you did. I stayed by both your bedsides for 3 weeks, but I was on my own, I didn’t know what I could do. I wanted a better life for you both.’ Tears had started to fall but she kept talking. ‘Giving you both up was not something I wanted but something I had to do.’

‘That doesn’t explain why you wouldn’t help me when I needed your help. My daughter, your granddaughter was dying.’

‘I didn’t want people to know about my past, and it is no excuse but I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t let your granddad know about how badly I’d fallen as a teenager.’ She stopped speaking and looked into Logan’s eyes.

‘I can never apologise enough, whatever I do will not be enough to erase the guilt and shame I feel over what I did to you, you didn’t deserve what I did.’ She sniffed. ‘I will never forgive myself and that is what I deserve but I was scared and lonely, I didn’t know what else to do.’

‘She’s dead because of you.’

‘I know, she is.’ Roo spoke as the tears threatened to fall, she blinked them away furiously, she didn’t deserve the release of the tears to make herself feel a little less pain.

I cant even bring myself to hate her, Lucy wouldn’t have wanted that, she was such an outgoing boisterous little madam and I love her, I miss her.

‘I can’t forgive you right now, I don’t hate you but I cant forgive you. You are one of the reasons my daughter isn’t here anymore. I can’t be around you, I won’t.’

‘I understand.’

I get why she did what she did but how do I move past it? She abandoned us. I wasn’t exactly the happiest child growing up.

‘I get why you did it, but I don’t want you in my life.’

‘I understand, I’ll stay away from you.’

Logan and Martha walked to the door and with one last look at Roo’s face where she had started to cry, they left her. Roo fell onto the floor and curled herself into a ball as she cried. She cried for the loss of her granddaughter and for the loss of her two children.

**

‘So its done?’ Jack asked them both.

‘We got the answers we wanted. She’s not a part of my life anymore’ Martha spoke as Logan got a beer out of the fridge and gulped half of it down.

‘It’s done.’

‘What you going to do now?’ Jack directed the question to Logan.

‘I don’t know, I was going to go back to New York, that’s where my life is but there is also too many memories there as well.’

‘Start fresh here then.’ Jack told him ‘Stay with us until you get on your feet and find a job.’

‘You can stay here, we have the room, you are family.’

‘Are you sure?’ he asked.

‘Yes, you are always welcome here.’

‘Then I will do for a while though.

Martha smiled as Logan walked into the lounge and dumped himself on the sofa.

‘Things are looking up then.’

‘Yeah, fresh start, the next chapter of our lives, the 4 of us.’

‘4?’

Martha put her arms around his neck. ‘Yep, 4 of us..’

‘Are you..’

‘Congratulations Daddy..’

‘Are you pregnant?’ Logan asked from the doorway.

‘Yeah..sorry I didn’t know if you’d be okay with it, I just don’t know if it is too soon for you.

‘I’m happy for you! You’re making me an uncle remember..’

Martha smiled as Logan gave her a hug.

I love her, she’s happy, I’m happy, she found a brother she didn’t even know she had. I am glad we returned to the Bay, shows good things do happen..

**

Thank you everyone for reading, I’ve loved writing this story and I hope you’ve enjoyed reading it too!